Should DH or I do CC?

[Breizhette]

Hi,
My DD is 8 months old and she wakes up everynight around 12. I then get up and co-sleep with her in the spare room so she can BF during the rest of the night. My DH hates this situation and I am starting to get tired. The paediatrician suggested CC and said she thought better if DH did it rather than me as I would smell of milk. DH first agreed but now would rather we shared the task. We meant to start tonight.
I think it'd be better if he did it as 1/my DD is used to me picking her up everytime she calls 2/I will smell of milk 3/not sure I can do it.
What do you think?
If I am being honest I don't really want to do it!
Thanks.

Sorry, I missed that you were going away. I left bottles of ebm if I was not going to be here in the night but you may find she will start cutting down on her milk in teh next few months anyway.

Its also possible that she only bfs during the night because you're there, so if you do what chirpy says and start by settling her after the 12am feed without bf then she might get the message that night time is not for feeding... And if you miss the contact just make up for it in the evening by lots of cuddles and bf BEFORE bed.

Sounds a bit like your dh misses having you in HIS bed! He's probably a bit lonely! Poor chap.

Lol @ Imbarryscott (great name) re chucking the book

sorry i meant without bf and without sleeping with her

Thank you all. I also just found out that I am not going away until at least January so there's no hurry. I will try the gentle way first and will put her down in her cot after feeding to start with and then jellybelly's suggestions. If this doesn't work I'll try PU-PD with my husband's help.
And joland5, you're right. I did tell him that as I got up for 8 months (which doesn't count in his eyes as I chose to breastfeed so it's my fault I had to get up ), and as I am doing the feeding, changing nappies and bathing, surely he can help with the sleep training.
But he migny not need to

So glad you have decided to to go with CC right now, as you didn't seem very keen.

I did CC with my dd1 at 9months and though it did work, I think it has been somewhat detrimental to her wellbeing. She's now 7 (yrs) and still finds it very hard to go to sleep by herself.

I was just like you, under some pressure from DH for things to be 'normal' ie everyone sleeping in their own beds all night.

If I could go back and have that time again, I would do exactly what you are doing now and try to make sure my dh was not feeling neglected.

I do think if I had just taken dd and slept with her in the spare room instead of contstantly fighting with her to sleep on her own, she would be alot more confident and a less anxious child now.

Remind your DH that this time will pass. Whenever you decide to stop BF (I stopped at 12mo) it's likely there will be a big change in her waking habits anyway. She may well sleep through the night of her own accord when there is no milk to wake up for.

Try PUPD, try not feeding her at night, just trying to settle her, you could try offering water in the night?

Good luck, I know it's hard when you are torn between dd and dh, but try to stick to what your insticts are telling you.

If your dh is very keen on CC - I'm sure there are articles online which suggest it's not necessarily a good thing for children in the long run, sounds like he is a very caring dad.

Thanks Hellish. It's so good to feel that someone understands. I have been torn for weeks now. I have now to tell him we're not starting CC tonight. He might be relieved not to have to get up!

Aw good luck! And at bf being your choice and therefore sleeplessness being your fault??!!! What if she was ff and still waking up then would that be also your fault for choosing to ff or is he assuming that none of this would happen with a ff baby, cos that just isn't the case!

Am only poking fun btw it does sound like he just wants what is best for all of you and with the gentle way I think one of the nicest things is that it can give a dad to a bf baby (who might feel a bit left out) a chance to develop ways to comfort his child without always having to pass her to you for your comforting boob!

Hope it goes well