Sleep training success stories

[Goostacean]

Hello. Steeling myself to sleep train our LO at 6mo because his poor sleep is affecting my day with him and my toddler, my marriage and my sanity.

Could you share your success stories please? I know there’s lots of advice online about how to go about it appropriately, but would love to hear how people actually got on. I guess I’m worried about being up all night with him screaming, rather than him adjusting, and then being even more tired.

I was a fully signed-up attachment parenting, extended breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping mother while pregnant. The idea of sleep training in which a baby cried was akin to abuse as far as I was concerned. Then I had an actual baby, and after ten months of utterly horrific sleep DH and I were on our knees and our marriage was on the rocks. We had tried all the 'gentle' methods and nothing had worked, and in the end in desperation we went for some kind of (un)controlled crying method. The first night there was quite a bit of crying from everyone. The second night, more of the same. The third night there DS cried for about five minutes, went to sleep, and then slept through the entire night for the first time in his life (he had been waking hourly up until that point) and proceeded to sleep through pretty much every night ever since. He was transformed by proper sleep and instantly became a happier baby all round, and we were able to enjoy being parents for the first time. Honestly, it was like a miracle. We still did all the other baby-led stuff, and did again for our two subsequent babies, but we sleep trained both at around 7 months old with similar success.

Thanks! I’ve read similarly that it can be the miracle boost people need. I’m also concerned about having to be consistent when he wakes in the night, and how to balance that with EBF.

Hi! I recommend the Respectful Sleep Training/Learning group on Facebook. Extremely comprehensive files with guidance on how to go about it and a really supportive atmosphere.

I read the files and decided on a tactic. It took about 1-2 naps before she got it and now she's amazing, practically asks to go in her crib, self settles for naps and bedtime, and links sleep cycles.

Next we will work on the night feed - I know she can go 11 hours as she did this last week. We'll be gentle and use the core night method.

Good luck!

PS my baby is also EBF. Happy to discuss and figure it out together - just let me know!

Thanks for the tip, I’ll check out the group! How old is your LO, @ladybranstonpickle ?

5 months yesterday!

@ladybranstonpickle I’m trying to get onto the group you mentioned but it is saying link broken - is it still up and running? It sounds so helpful!

They archive it between 9pm-5am PST, I think to let the admins monitor the posts, just keep trying a bit later maybe.

@ladybranstonpickle thanks!

Did controlled crying with both kids - worked in 3 nights and totally amazing feeling to get full night's sleep

Yay! Inspiration. Thanks

@Settlersofcatan What intervals did you leave? And how old were the children? Thanks!

We did controlled crying (2 min intervals) with dd at almost 7 months. Had been co-sleeping for 3 months and it was getting dangerous. We used the wonder weeks app to check she wasn't in a leap, and the first night she slept the whole night! For about 45 mins it was really difficult, but I knew that the crying wasn't hurting her (Google nhs controlled crying for analysis of scientific studies). Got easier and easier every night, then she went into a leap and started teething so for a couple of nights it took her a bit longer but once she was asleep she would wake maximum once a night. It has changed our lives! I was really anxious about it in the run up but really glad we did it.

I could have written cheese's post almost word for word! Very similar experience. Now pregnant with DC2 and won't hesitate to sleep train if necessary.

We used this technique- www.parent4success.com/2012/03/05/the-controlled-crying-sleep-technique/

10 months with our eldest and 6 months with the youngest. It was much faster with the younger baby but still ok with the 10 month old.

Anecdotally, it's helpful to do before the baby is able to get out of the cot

I would also echo the post made earlier by @cheeseismydownfall in that don't feel like sleep training defines you as a parent. My 10 month old has had no formula and barely been in the pram, use a sling 99% of the time, we have done baby led weaning etc. But I am not into being woken up every 2 hours.

Oh no, I don’t feel guilty about it... my eldest was nearly trained about four times but avoided it by the skin of his teeth by miraculously having a decent night or two after every period that was so bad I decided to start training! But because he was an only I could rest during the day. Now it’s a whole other ball game. I’m just nervous that I might make things worse or do it “wrong”...

I've been totally against crying it out but the past month with my 6mo has been torture and she wakes every 1-2 hours. I honestly don't know if she would settle this way because she gets so irrate and wound up if she starts crying. Can you all explain exactly how you did the controlled crying and how long you left your LO's for before going to them and how long in total it took for them to fall asleep?

We did pick up and put down at about 4 months, would take turns to sit next to his crib and when he cried pick him up, settle him (as much as poss) and put him down. Bit more to it really but I preferred that than leaving him to cry. After a week maybe we moved to leaving the room and going in to shush and pat. It only took a couple of weeks. He’s been really good at self settling since then. I did it for daytime naps too.

I hear cry it out works much faster but I just couldn’t listen to him cry hysterically I don’t think (although I would if I was on my knees!)

I honestly just don’t want my baby in my bed for our sake and for his and I could see it happening if we didn’t get him comfortable and feeling safe in his crib.
Thankfully he responded well but not all babies do.

Following this thread with interest! Trying to stop co sleeping with my 7 month old, have always thought crying methods were cruel but now reconsidering!

Following too, after spending 90 minutes with my daughter wailing at me whilst franctically rubbing her eyes with tiredness. She's 20 weeks and really struggling with naps and nighttime sleep. We co-sleep but wonder if she'd be better now in her own space.

I'm in the US where sleep training is very commonplace and recommended by pediatricians. I did extinction (with a couple of moderations) and it worked like a charm.

I full expect to flamed and kicked off Mumsnet for saying that though.

I am in the midst of the pick up, put down method. But am so tired, when he wakes at 2/3 am I bring him in with me.

He still has a bottle at night too.

He also will only fall asleep on his own in the car/in the pram. .

I am just following my instincts right now but if it carries on much longer, then I will no doubt try another method.

Well last night my cheeky monkey slept from 8pm to 7.30am with only one 10min feed at 3.30am. So if he keeps that up, I won’t need to train him after all. However if recent history is repeating itself, I’ll be up 6 times tonight to make up for it...! So we shall see.

@Peanut55
Sounds exactly like my son, will only fall asleep on his own in the car/pram. Otherwise its on me.

For those that have successfully done controlled crying methods - would this still work if baby keeps crying during the "comforting" stage? He only stops when I pick him up and I've read you're not meant to do that with these methods.