Mums who used to BF baby to sleep.

[Reesie]

My lo is 9months old and I have BF her to sleep. She has been a terrible sleeper from birth (hourly wakings from birth to 3 months then 11/2 to 2 hours until 6 months). I have tried lots of things to try and get her to sleep but have failed miserably. I nearly ended up going mad with it all.

In the end I decided to not to worry about it anymore as I couldn't seem to change things. So, I just relaxed and BF her to sleep each night and often let her stay in our bed. Lo and behold a few days after I made that decision she started to sleep up to 8 hour stretches!!!! I have been co-sleeping with her the last few nights and despite my stiff shoulder and back in the morning - am starting to enjoy it.

However, a close friends and family have told me that I must be mad to do this as she'll never learn to sleep on her own or settle herself to sleep. I've been told that by the time she's about 2 - I'll have lots of sleep issue problems.

I'm going back to work in 6 weeks and my job can be quite demanding and stressful. I'm dreading having to go back without having any sleep the night before...

Is anybody out there who has said b***ks to routines and self settling techniques - what happened to you lo's sleep a months and years down the line?

hunker
yes she did, she used to take it off! Little blighter! So was a waste of time even trying.
She would wake up always straight after she had wet and eventually she stopped, by herself. I do believe that by waking up each time she learnt that she didnt like it and it was somehow a concious decision. I never lifted her, well tried it, she would still wet again later guaranteed!

I also BF both of mine to sleep but did not co-sleep with them. Just popped them in their cots asleep. DD was a bit more tricky & at first I used to feed her to sleep on our double bed and then transfer to cot when we went to bed.

I did do CC with both at about 9 mnths to get them to get them to sleep through night. Had a bit of crying on the first night but never let them cry for more than 5 minutes without going in and cuddling them. Then it worked & they slept through.

At some point (poss 1 year) I stopped BF them to sleep - they just had a feed and then put in cot awake and held their hands for a bit until they dropped off.

Gave up BF my DD when she was 3.

So I guess I'm a bit of a mixture. They both sleep v well now - 10 or 11 hours per night, never wake up upset or reluctant to go to bed.

Go with your instincts. Night feeding when you are breastfeeding is no hassle as you can both cuddle up in bed together. Not half as tiring as listening to a sad and lonely baby!

Haychee, I've read that night dryness is possible by the production of a hormone that suppresses the ability to wee while asleep. Until that hormone's produced, your child physically can't be dry at night. It's not about "learning" that it's not nice to wet the bed, afaik.

Did she have three years of wetting the bed?

Don't worry about it. Your LO will be the most confident and feel so loved! She'll be fine sleeping by herself given time.

Bollocks to routines. Follow your mothering instincts. You're doing a great job.

Not read any posts apart from OP but I breastfed DS to sleep until he was about 10 months, when he started biting alot and breastfeeding phased out... but before that, about 9 - 91/2 months as soon as he was put into my bed he would fall asleep. He is now 18 months and wonderful about going to sleep, I put him to bed wide awake.

I BF both of mine to sleep and they slept in our bed. Have had some minor probs that didn't last long. Seemed to be as they got older and went through their little 'stages'. My eldest has slept in her own bed by herself for years now. and my 2 year old sleeps through most nights in her cot and they both go to bed awake and fall asleep themselves.
Stick with it, continue with what you are doing, if it suits you both. The close bond you have is too precious and it will only last a little while (because they get too big and push you away and they eventually want their own space.) at this point we made the decision that they had to sleep in their own room, on their own and it now works.
sorry for waffling

It depends on the child and on the parent. I coslept and bf my ds to sleep until 6 months and then did cc. But still sometimes bf him to sleep after that until 15 months. DS is the best sleeper in the world....has been known to put himself to bed when tired. However, my dd was a totally different matter....I hated having her in my bed...she snuffled and wriggled and wouldn't let herself be bfed to sleep no matter how much I tried. She is still a much worse sleeper than ds. I think that although I tried to give them the same treatment, their personalities, coupled with my level of tolerance ended up defining the final results. If you are happy sleeping with your dd, then do. If you don't sleep well with her and you need your sleep to function then don't. Either way, you are doing the best for your dd, because you will be a happier mom at the end of it.

Bf all of my 3 too sleep for best part of 1st yr. The only one I had probs with was my 3rd - the girl. She was a very very light sleeper, still is, so when I snuck out she would wake and she overfed so she would feed and feed and them vomit it all up. She was an awful sleeper for the 1st 2 years and more or less in our bed.

Now she is 3 and okay but still not great. I think this is just her, nothing to do with feeding btw! Good luck

DD2 was like this often waking 5-6 times in the night and only a BF would do, we coslept until 12 months when we decided ebough was enough I was knackered. We put her in her cot beside the bed and the first night DP got up to her, rocked her, shhed her etc took about 40 minutes of whinging for her to go down, 10 minutes the second night and that's been her since. Once she realised there was no boob on offer she didn't get up anymore. I wouldn't have dont it on a younger baby as I think some do need milk in the night and I wouldn't have left her on her own but it worked for us.

I missed all the later posting as I was ..well, In bed...

Well, I did the usual - BF her to sleep and put her in her cot. Then she woke at 5.30am!!!!!!! I popped her in bed with me and gave her anther BF and we both snuggled in until 7.30am. Bliss!

The problem is now is that I quite missed her in the night.... I know, I know that I wanted a baby that would sleep all night in her own cot - but now I'm getting used to a little person in bed with us from midnight on - it's nice isn't it?

I spoke to Dh and he felt the same - he loved having her in our bed too.

So, in my opinion the old 'self soothing technique' is rubbish. I suppose if we went back a few thousand years or asked a lovely mum from a tribe in outer somewhere or other about 'self soothing techniques' they would look at us as if we were barking. Their little babies I'm sure would all be BF to sleep.

So - I shall continue to BF to sleep and co-share with my lovely snuggly baby.

All the posts I've had - the majority have been really positive about it - so, why are we felt that we have to get baby to sleep on their own. Lots of us fail miserably at it and then feel terrible.

Whatever works for you and your dh is best. Happy snuggling!

I used to do it with both of mine. It felt natural to me. I went with my instincts. Ds1 used to use me as a dummy, which was fine except he got his first 2 teeth at 3 months (ouch!)

Also, I used to have them at the side of me and I slept and they would sort themselves out. From very very tiny, they could wiggle and somehow manouvre themselves into position, I would quite often wake up to find baby happily sucking away!

(There's 15 months between my lads, so this wasn't both of them at the same time, btw!!)

did this with both of mine BUT they were both completely different sleepers

dd1 slept through from about 6 months - give or take the odd cold/teething bout, but she would NEVER sleep in our bed. Which was a pain in the arse as you would be pacing the floor

dd2, erm, can still be a PITA and she is 3! Can still be in our bed once or twice a week, and do you know what, who cares. She is 3 not 13.

Go with your gut instinct is my only parenting tip

Did this with both of mine - when I weaned DD1 at 19 months she DID sleep a little better during the night - but that was probably because at that time Daddy went in to comfort her instead of me. However, she is now 5 and wakes 1-2 times a night anyway!

DD2 is now 2 and was weaned at 20 months and weaning made no difference - she still wakes lots during the night!

Yes, same here, like I said, both of mine got the same start. (knackered mum flopping out boob and falling asleep. neglected infant left to wriggle like a worm to locate nipple. Yelling infant having nipple shoved in gob to shut him up. And so on and so forth)

Ds1 woke every 2 hours until he was 15 months old (oddly, it just stopped at around the same time ds2 was born)

Ds2 slept through from day one (in fact, dh woke him up that first night because he was worried that he had slept too long!!)

ds2 was a great sleeper until he was about 1, went through a patch of refusing to go down, got over it!

Now - at 7 & 8, ds1 wakes up if there's a chink of light or a bit of noise (gets very cross!) ds2, well, they could drop a bomb in the room and he'd not wake up! but he's a BUGGER to get to sleep, always want to play about!

ds1 used to do that, but is currently going through a straight to sleep phase.

In a month it'll no doubt be different again!

I guess my point is, do what feels right to you, whatever will be will be.

And it probably will be everything, at one time or another.

bf all mine to sleep till they got to about 6m, co-sleeping more and more with each baby... then i gave them a bottle at bedtime to sleep instead. they are 4, 3 and 20m now and are all hooked on bottles to go to sleep (well, dp and i are hooked on them having bottles to go to sleep anyway) whice i am a touch uncomfortable with in itself, but so much so im gonna change it anytime soon as i havnt seen an argument to convince me its worth the battle.

anyways, they all sleep v well together in a room (seperate beds) on the whole. and none of them were in a cot much past 12m.

my2pw - so true. nothing more constant than change ime.

nappiesgalore
Have you tried the spout type bottle top instead of a teat, by avent? Is a step away from the teat type addiction.

I always bf mine until they were asleep (winded them halfway through though), I have never had a problem with either child (both completely different personalities) settling into their own cots, beds, rooms etc afterwards.

I shall no doubt be doing the same with number 3, if I ever get pg - although after hearing about a friend suffocating her baby by sleeping in bed with her I shan't be doing that next time.

Don't worry, trust your own instincts - your baby = your way..

oh sorry, I think I may have misread, I stopped b/f at arounnd the 6 month mark (mainly because I had had enough!)

I did co sleep with dd2 though

not recently haychee, tho i do have one. i currently make up 6 bottles at bedtime, 2 each, so id have to buy a fair few to give it a go... but maybe worth a try. ta.

If babies weren't intended to bf to sleep, breast milk wouldn't be so sleepymaking. That's what I decided.

agree vesela

bf to sleep all of mine,dident really set out o do it,but they always slept after a feed and it felt a bit harsh to make them stop! never really minded where anyone slept so long as they sdid sleep.
ds1 would climb into my bed in the middle of the night until he was 7 and he came in and discovered his new brother and both his sisters were already there and decided he would be better off in his own bed!
my dd 1 came unto bed at some point most nights til she was about 5 dd 2 until she was about8 and ds 2 is 8 at the moment and often calls in the night still and i go and get into his bed.its getting a bit boring now after 16 years of bed shuffling,but i think its a good relationship builder.(for parents and kids,terrible for parents,we dident sleep in the same place for years poor dp was stuck with the sofa!)

I used to feed ds2 to sleep, he is now 20mo and had been self settling 'after' his feed for some months now, and I stopped feeding him about 6 weeks ago - and he just settles after a story and a cuddle.