6 month baby HATES new cot - help!

[PastaFasool]

My 6 month old baby was sleeping brilliantly in a Tutti Bambini fabric bedside cot. He loved snuggling into the fabric sides and being cosy. We were getting bedtime around 7.30pm, and often he would sleep thru til 3am or 4am before needing a feed, then back to sleep until 7.30am. It was brilliant for all of us.

Four nights ago we moved him into a regular wooden cot, and he HATES it. He is taking up to an hour to settle, he's been waking every 2 hours crying, and finds it hard to self soothe as when he tries to snuggle into the side of the cot he's banging his little face against wooden bars. DS also used to self soothe by stroking the fabric sides of his bedside crib, we could see and hear him running his fingers down the mesh side.

DH has been great helping out, and can sometimes get DS back to sleep by holding his hand and shushing. However it doesn't always work, and I am back to breastfeeding up to 3 times a night to get DS to sleep. I don't think DS is always hungry as he calms down when cuddled, I had just been using breastfeeding as a comfort whilst he adjusts to the new bed but it's the fourth night and feels like it's getting worse rather than better.

I am getting desperate for all of us to sleep more than 2 hours at a stretch again... Does anyone have any advice? Desperately wish we could carry on using his old bed but it's not safe after 6 months as the sides are too low.

Thanks in advance!

I'd just buy the travel cot OP, you're likely to need one anyway at some point. It's a nightmare when they won't settle, you have my sympathy!

If it's any consolation DS2 (17 weeks) is currently sat on my lap wide awake watching bake off'

@Sunshinegirl82 I forgot about Bake Off tonight! Will have to watch it on the catch up! No spoilers please :-D

DS is sitting having a cuddle with me too, hiccupping away but at least not crying. We're sitting in his room trying to make it not a scary place at night...

Hopefully it ended up a better night for you all. My LO always needs an early night if he didn't get his full 12 hours the night before. If I don't catch him at the right time, he gets overtired and can take HOURS to settle.

@username198817 I did bring bedtime forward a bit, everything was lovely and sleepy and snuggly until DS fell asleep on the boob, then woke up being put down and got more and more upset because overtired. He just did a 6 hour stretch, with a few episodes of shouting but getting himself back to sleep...

Why not just go with your instinct and what your baby wants rather then trying to break 'habits' and force things he's just not feeling ready for?

My now 2 year old was exactly like yours as a baby and he still feeds to sleep and if he's not settling in his cot he sleeps in my bed.

We all get a decent 10 hour stretch, he's happy, we're happy

What I'm trying to say is guidelines are just that. Not the law.

And every month things change. Illness. Teething. Growth spurt. Separation anxiety. They won't stick to any routine perfectly. You just need to go with whatever makes them happy at that age or you will drive yourself mad, they are only doing what comes naturally.

@checkeredredshorts TBH if feeding to sleep still worked, I would definitely stick with it - I love the snuggly end of the day feed in a warm dark room, it feels so special. The problem is that I can't put him down asleep in the new cot without waking him. In his old bed, he would wake a little but then he would recognise his cosy bed and snuggle down happily.

It's so hard to know whether to try to help him feel secure and safe in his new bed whilst he gets used to it, or whether to change things about the bed. I remember when he was tiny, he used to cry at every nappy change and every bath - but obviously we kept doing them, making him feel as secure as possible, and now he loves both!

I used to be a PA to a researcher in attachment theory, so I am VERY pro cuddles, snuggles, physical contact and being close to my baby! Also I come from a southern Italian background, we are ALL about cuddling our babies as much as they will let us!

@PastaFasool how did this end? Just found your thread looking for tips as my 6mo is really struggling with the transition to his cot bed 🤦‍♀️

@PastaFasool did you ever find anything that worked? I know it's an old post but me and little one are going through this now
Appreciate any other advice

@KaeBee did you find anything to help?

@Adamibbo this was a while ago now but we just persisted, it was a really tricky several nights but then settled, my partner wasn’t comfortable adding anything into the cot so we just stuck with white noise and everything we were doing before the cot. Also gave him a comforter shortly after I think.