7M/O STILL doesn't sleep!

[rottiemum88]

I've read so many of these threads from others, but none seem to exactly match our situation so I wonder if anyone might be able to offer any help/advice. I'm due back at work (full time) in exactly a month and if things haven't improved by then I'm going to really struggle

DS is almost 7 months and as a newborn was an amazing sleeper. He'd go down in his next-to-me crib when we went to bed at 10ish and sleep through until 3/4, have a quick feed and go back to sleep until 7. This all changed at 8 weeks old, when despite us changing nothing else about his routine, he started waking up hourly through the night!

Initially we thought introducing more of a routine might help, so we brought bedtime forward (gradually) to 7:30/8pm and did bath, story, feed and then into his crib, but it didn't make any difference, he continued to wake hourly through the night.

Other things we've tried:

• DS has always been combi fed with one bottle of formula given by DH when he gets home from work. We changed the formula feed to the last one before bed in the hope he'd sleep longer - didn't work
• Putting down drowsy but awake
• Feeding to sleep
• Rigid daytime routine with set nap times, walk times, playtime etc
• Days where we just go with the flow
• Earlier bedtimes
• Llater bedtimes
• Giving a dummy, which DS accepted for naps during the day but for some reason not at night. Whenever we've tried to give the dummy if he wakes at night, he becomes even more agitated and won't settle again until he's had a feed
• DH doing the bedtime routine/night wakings. DS just doesn't settle well for him and refuses a bottle altogether in the middle of the night. The longest I've managed to hold out was an hour and a half of DH holding and rocking him without success before I caved and gave him a feed so he'd go back to sleep

We moved him to his full size cot at 6 months after he outgrew the next-to-me and we thought lack of space might actually be disrupting his sleep. If anything the cot seems to have made things worse and he's sometimes waking every 30-45 minutes tossing and turning and getting himself caught in the bars. I never wanted to cosleep but have resorted to doing so over the past few weeks just to get any kind of sleep myself. If anything this really hasn't helped DS as he's even more restless and unsettled, but at least I can sleep through some of the feeds.

I feel like there must be something really obvious I'm missing but I'm so tired these days I'm struggling to see the situation clearly anymore and just concentrate on surviving each day the best I can. The one thing we haven't tried I guess is moving him to his own room, but I've been trying to avoid it if I'm honest because if his sleep is still as bad as it is now, it's just going to make life even harder than it already is traipsing across the landing 8-10 times a night.

Any help would be very gratefully received!

Sorry it's long

I’m definitely no expert on this but how do you usually get him to go to sleep for naps and in the evening? As it just sounds like he hasn’t learnt to link sleep cycles on his own yet, so is waking up after every cycle and he doesn’t know how to get to sleep in his own?

Hi, thanks for the reply. For naps I usually take him upstairs, give him a feed and then put him down in his cot. He's almost always still awake and might start to cry, but I'll give him his dummy and he goes straight to sleep. Naps are hit and miss, but can be anything from 30 minutes to 2 hours long. Nighttime I tend to do bath, story then feed and put him down in his cot. Again he's usually drowsy but still awake, but never takes his dummy. For some reason actually getting him down to sleep has never really been a problem, but getting him to stay that way is proving tricky!

I have no advice but lots of sympathy. Mine woke that much and other people with babies that woke every few hours really didn't get how little sleep it was. I dreamed of the 2 hourly wake ups that they were lamenting!

I'm afraid the only things that stopped me losing my mind was just accepting the bad sleep and no longer trying to 'fix' it. That's not going to cut it for back to work though.

Maybe a baby sleep coach would help?

My DS didn't wake as often as yours but not brilliant. He hated his cot and got limbs stuck in the bars, whacked against the sides. I bought him a double bed, put it in the corner and bought a bed rail and co slept. Then when I really needed proper sleep my DH would take his turn to sleep with him. That's how we got through. Good luck, sounds so tough. Hope someone else has a genius idea

Sounds like my DD! Like the exact same... the first year was hell, then I had enough after her birthday I let her cry it out, it got better but she still is a crap sleep at 3 years old its just now I can shove the tablet on and go back to bed 😂🙌🏻

Honestly, I would try him in his own room. If I was in the room with my DD there's no way she would ever sleep.

@SleepWarrior thank you, in some ways it's just nice to hear DS isn't the only baby ever to have slept this badly! Did you make it out the other side eventually? I have considered a sleep coach, but have some reservations that they'll just suggest CIO and I really couldn't do that to DS. I did (probably a bit half heartedly) try the pick up/put down method for a few nights, as well as just sitting by the cot shhhh'ing, patting, etc but it turns out DS has willpower much stronger than mine and will just cry and cry until I give him a feed. I know he's probably using it for comfort rather than genuine hunger, but have yet to find anything else he'll accept in its place

@TypicalMeBreakMyTypicalRules I think that's probably what we'll end up doing. DH has been sleeping in our spare room for a while now anyway as he's a noisy sleeper and I (seemingly wrongly) blamed him for some of DS's night wakings So technically cosleeping longer term wouldn't be an issue, I'm just concerned that DS sleeps really restlessly in my bed and it'd actually be better for him if I could find a way to help his sleep through in his cot.

My DS has a soy intolerance and if he’s accidentally eaten some (it’s in bloody everything) he is exactly like this, that and the nappies are how I know. Could it be an ongoing food intolerance? Total long shot.

@HJWT2 I'm not sure I'll still be alive if this is still happening when he's 3! 😱

Try him in his own room. He might be a light sleeper and disturbed by your presence. DS always used to sleep wherever we put him but about 5mths he started to need to be by himself or he would just fight it.

We have a light projector that makes colourful waves on DS' bedroom ceiling- it was about £20 from Amazon. He likes to lie and watch the colours and it encourages him to relax. Now that he is two he always asks for it at bedtime. It stays on for an hour and then switches itself off.

Another thing we do is have quiet stories (Thomas the Tank Engine) playing on repeat if he is a bit unsettled. Again, its a bit of a relaxing distraction.

@KittenCamile Hmm, it's interesting because at various points I've suspected DS might have reflux as he's sick quite a lot, but the reflux meds (tried gaviscon, ranitidine and omeprazole) never did anything to help. Drs just said he'd probably grow out of it once he was weaned and didn't have much else to suggest. I'm not sure how I'd go about investigating whether he has potential food allergies/intolerances though?

@peachgreen Yes I think I'm just going to have to bite the bullet this weekend and get DH to dismantle and relocate the cot!

Our ds wasnt a great sleeper - not that bad but at 8 months (co sleeping since birth) he was still waking every 1.5 hours. We moved him into a cot in our room for a week to get used to it..then into his own room. Absolute game changer. He still wakes up at night (twice in 12 hours usually but can be worse when teething) but is easily settled by a quick feed from me or a cuddle from his dad and that's it. Turns out we were all disturbing each other!

Put him in his own room - keep it dark, give him some water in a non spill beaker to have in his cot, make sure you can hear him if he wakes and of course go in when he needs you but only go in if he actually cries or really does need you, not just shuffling about or squeaking. Good luck!!!!

And to add - I avoided moving him for exactly the same reasons as you and was dreading it. Just give it a go and see if it works.

I’m having the exact same issues, @rottiemum88. DD2 is 7 months and generally wakes every hour to two hours. I do remember DD1 going through a similar phase around the time she started to crawl so I’m just hoping that it is a phase and that she will begin to sleep longer stretches again! Lots of sympathy for you - it’s so hard having broken sleep every night!!

He’s only seven months, night feeds may well be genuine hunger. How’s he getting on with weaning? You might find getting more calories in him during the day helps.
I also second what a pp suggested about trying giving baby their own bedroom. It really helped my eldest at that age, in fact he went from waking a lot to only once or twice.
My Dc3 is also seven months so I feel your sleep deprived pain.

@CalamityJune do you know what projector it was?

I actually forgot to mention, he already has white noise for both naps and nighttime sleep and absolutely won't sleep without it now, although he did as a newborn funnily enough. We've never tried anything with lights though, although we do know he won't sleep whatsoever in a pitch black room, just screams the place down, so he has a nightlight already just to take the edge off.

@Marbles321 thank you, I'm definitely going to try. Fingers crossed it helps!

Here it is! Ours doesnt have the remote control or sound though. This one seems very whizzy!

[2019 Upgraded]Ocean Projector Lamp Night Light+Remote Control+Timer, Bedside Child Lights Baby Gifts with 8 Color Modes+6 Music Sounds+Angle Adjustment for Party Decoration https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07M61RTRW/ref=cmswwrcppapiii_83ZsDbKBN6TB0

@sauchiehall sympathy for you also! It really is tough. My final remaining hope is that if his sleep doesn't improve by the time I go back to work then nursery will hopefully do a far better job of tiring him out in the days than I usually manage in my half-zombified state 😂

My dd was a bit like this. Slept really well as a newborn and then it all went wrong at 5 months. She started sleeping through most nights again at about 14 months after we night weaned. We tried it all in between: co-sleeping, different rooms, pick-up put-down, feed to sleep, rock to sleep, go to sleep in her cot, earlier bedtimes, later bedtimes, timed naps...

My advice to myself for next time will be to just do what it takes to get through it, and know that it will improve at some point and not stress as much about trying to improve it. Easier said than actually done but 7 months is still really quite young and I think it's perfectly normal for them to be sleep thieves still. Hope it improves soon for you, it's bloody tough.

@TankGirl97 sorry, I know it might sometimes be hunger and I fully accept at 7 months a baby might still be waking at night to feed. I was more meaning that I don't think it can be genuine hunger at each of the 8-10 times he wakes through the night. I'll definitely be trying him in his own room though, thanks!

@rottiemum88 YEP! We went away for 2 nights, the 1st night she didn't go to sleep till 4AM!! The 2nd night she went to sleep at 10pm but woke up at 4AM! 😂

@CalamityJune ordered! Thank you 🤞🤞