7M/O STILL doesn't sleep!

[rottiemum88]

I've read so many of these threads from others, but none seem to exactly match our situation so I wonder if anyone might be able to offer any help/advice. I'm due back at work (full time) in exactly a month and if things haven't improved by then I'm going to really struggle

DS is almost 7 months and as a newborn was an amazing sleeper. He'd go down in his next-to-me crib when we went to bed at 10ish and sleep through until 3/4, have a quick feed and go back to sleep until 7. This all changed at 8 weeks old, when despite us changing nothing else about his routine, he started waking up hourly through the night!

Initially we thought introducing more of a routine might help, so we brought bedtime forward (gradually) to 7:30/8pm and did bath, story, feed and then into his crib, but it didn't make any difference, he continued to wake hourly through the night.

Other things we've tried:

• DS has always been combi fed with one bottle of formula given by DH when he gets home from work. We changed the formula feed to the last one before bed in the hope he'd sleep longer - didn't work
• Putting down drowsy but awake
• Feeding to sleep
• Rigid daytime routine with set nap times, walk times, playtime etc
• Days where we just go with the flow
• Earlier bedtimes
• Llater bedtimes
• Giving a dummy, which DS accepted for naps during the day but for some reason not at night. Whenever we've tried to give the dummy if he wakes at night, he becomes even more agitated and won't settle again until he's had a feed
• DH doing the bedtime routine/night wakings. DS just doesn't settle well for him and refuses a bottle altogether in the middle of the night. The longest I've managed to hold out was an hour and a half of DH holding and rocking him without success before I caved and gave him a feed so he'd go back to sleep

We moved him to his full size cot at 6 months after he outgrew the next-to-me and we thought lack of space might actually be disrupting his sleep. If anything the cot seems to have made things worse and he's sometimes waking every 30-45 minutes tossing and turning and getting himself caught in the bars. I never wanted to cosleep but have resorted to doing so over the past few weeks just to get any kind of sleep myself. If anything this really hasn't helped DS as he's even more restless and unsettled, but at least I can sleep through some of the feeds.

I feel like there must be something really obvious I'm missing but I'm so tired these days I'm struggling to see the situation clearly anymore and just concentrate on surviving each day the best I can. The one thing we haven't tried I guess is moving him to his own room, but I've been trying to avoid it if I'm honest because if his sleep is still as bad as it is now, it's just going to make life even harder than it already is traipsing across the landing 8-10 times a night.

Any help would be very gratefully received!

Sorry it's long

Update: I moved the cot back across the corridor this afternoon and put DS down in his own room for the first time tonight! No protest at all going to sleep (although I did keep him up for an extra hour to make doubly sure he'd be tired 😐) and lo and behold... 2 and a half hours later he's still asleep! This is the first time he's slept for longer than an hour at night in over 5 months and I'm absolutely gobsmacked. Keep resisting the urge to go in and check on him (we've got a monitor and he seems fine) incase I disturb him, but if he doesn't wake up by the time I go to bed myself in an hour I imagine I'll have to have a quick look for my own sanity. He could wake up every 5 minutes for the rest of the night and I'd still be over the moon with this progress. Thanks again for the advice everyone 😊

@rottiemum88 just read this thread and I’m so pleased that there’s been a change OP, I bet you feel over the moon! Keep us updated, I’m having a similar problem.

@Sunflower160 thanks, yes I'm thrilled, moreso for DS than myself that he's finally getting some of the sleep he needs He's actually woken up about 30 minutes ago, but it was still a really good stretch for him and he went straight back down after a quick feed. How old is your LO? Is it an ongoing issue you're having with sleep or a more recent thing?

Brilliant news

Fantastic! And it should get better and better from here. Some babies - like some adults - are just really bad at sharing a room!

@peachgreen He must take after me, I sleep much better when DH is in the spare room

Another update: Sadly after the success of the first night, we were back to hourly and waking last night and tonight it's regressed to every 15-20 minutes since 7pm Nothing else about our routine has been any different to normal so I'm struggling to explain it, but every time he's woken up and we've seen it on the monitor he's looked absolutely panic stricken about being alone which is heartbreaking to watch, so I've brought him back into my bed until we work out what to do next

What's happening when he wakes up? Is he crying?

@peachgreen Yes crying, but not just a little bit, it's always really loud, red-faced distraught crying, with tears streaming down his face. The only thing that settles him once he's gotten himself into that state (which he does instantly, I've never left him for long before responding) is to feed him. Although last night it was so frequent he was waking that DH did go in a couple of times and manage to get him back to sleep just by holding him, but he still woke again 15-20 minutes later. He was also "up for the day" at 3:30 this morning and we've had similar for a week or so now of waking ridiculously early, so I've no idea what's going on but it's starting to break me

I think it's time to take him to the GP to be honest, OP - that really is significantly frequent wakings and the fact that he's going immediately to screaming suggests to me that he could be in pain. You poor thing, it sounds absolutely hellish.

Eugh, I think you might be right. Although I might need to look at changing GPs if that's the case, I've already had way too many "it's just colic and he'll grow out of it" type conversations with my existing ones. It's so hard just to get someone to listen sometimes

It really is. My DD had a dairy allergy and it was very difficult to get diagnosed. How is he during the day?

@peachgreen He's fine on the whole. Sometimes every so slightly sick after feeds and has occasional meltdowns which seem to be from overtiredness, which isn't really surprising given how little proper sleep he's getting. I think that's the reason we've never been taken very seriously in terms of there being a medical cause for the night wakings, because there's nothing to indicate any problem when he's awake. They did humour me a bit re him potentially having reflux for a while, but when the medication(s) at varying doses never did anything to help, they basically said it's just the way he is and he'll eventually grow out of it, possibly ones we started weaning him. The issues with that could probably make for a thread of its own because he really hasn't taken to solids whatsoever, either purées or finger foods, despite us trying loads so I think another trip to the GP is warranted at this point really. I did try speaking to the HV about it a couple of times but she was beyond useless, offered no advice and looked at me blankly 🤦🏼‍♀️