Losing my mind with newborn

[Kara4]

My daughter is about 8 weeks old and has never slept well during the day. She’s FF and sleeps well at night.

At first she’d only sleep during the day if I held her, so I got a sling. I’ve been wearing her most of the day and still trying to set her down for naps occasionally.

She used to sleep in the sling but has always fought it. Now she won’t go in at all. She won’t sleep when I hold her, won’t sleep if I set her down next to me, won’t sleep in her cot, won’t sleep in the car, won’t sleep in her pram.

I watch her cues, I watch her wake windows, I know she’s tired. But she fights it and I don’t know what else to do for her. She wants to look at everything all the time and even health professionals have commented on how alert she was from a very young age.

Things have gotten worse since she got her jabs this week plus it’s been so hot. But to tell the truth, she was resisting naps last week too so I can’t blame it on that.

What more can I do for her?

Have you tried a mobile over her cot? Worked for us.

Aw I feel for you OP. Mine wasn't much of a sleeper - day or night. Have you tried a different sling. Maybe it's not comfortable?

Are you persevering long enough with walks in the pram? Sometimes at that age something that doesn't work one week will work the next.

We had some of those baby dvds that play patterns etc. Not sure what age they are suitable for (I'm long out of the baby stage) but while it didn't always help with sleep it did help soothe when overtired!

It won't make you feel better just now, but it will get better.

@burritofan when she cries there is definite flailing involved, then she gets upset that she’s trapped in the sling. She gets so worked up that I don’t try to put her back in straight away because I feel like I’m torturing her!

@orangejuicer she seems to find them interesting but not really relaxing? You’ve inspired me to order a portable one though, I’ve been thinking about it for a while. We’ll see if she likes it!

@WhatWouldTheDoctorDo I would suspect the sling but she used to love it and it was the only way she’d sleep. We have two, one stretchy and one buckles. She’s gotten more resistant to both now. Really hoping it’s a phase!

I think you’re right about things changing week to week. I just feel like I’m running out of options. If it’s this much of a struggle to get her to go down for twenty minutes at a time, what on earth am I going to do next week?!

I used to play classical music to my non sleeping dd, it seemed to calm her and she would then drop off sometimes. Perhaps worth a try? And once she became a bit older, a muslin cloth and dummy and she came to associate these with day time nap time.
I do so feel for you, easy for me to say now but these days will pass .

@kara4 it might be worth a try. My DS was always fighting sleep in his cot and the mobile just gave him something to focus on that allowed him to settle. Bit of a different story now at 8mo but it worked for us when he was little

I have been there my dd was exactly the same - the midwives commented when she was born how alert she was. It was a real challenge to get her to nap but if she didn't she would become over stimulated/overtired/wired and scream the house down early evening. It was awful and as a single mum I found it very tough. I found that lying with her in a dark room helped, white noise and sling sometimes, and yes, sometimes I had to let her cry it out because I was in tears myself and exhausted but I always checked on her every few mins. She did then settle into a routine of napping once a day. The plus side is now she is three she is amazing when we need to be flexible with bedtimes etc and dropped her nap easily when she was ready. Keep trying but like all difficult phases this will pass and your baby will settle into a routine that works for her.

I wanted to update everyone and say that it’s getting better. It’s not consistent, and no one thing works from one day to the next or even one nap to the next. But I have her sleeping on occasion and hope things get better from here.

Thank you for your suggestions and commiserations, they have really helped me through the worst days.

Kara4 so glad to hear it’s getting better for you. I’m currently having the same issues as you were having. My DS is 6 weeks old and it’s a struggle. It’s made harder when I have my 3 yo following me like a sheep and I can’t leave him in a room alone while I try and settle my littlest! Feel bad for wishing away the next few weeks but I just can’t wait for it to get better x

Hang in there @Lubilu28! Things are so much better now. I don't think there was anything I could have done differently, we just had to get through it. Do whatever you need to cope. Can anyone watch your older son for a bit to help out?