I’ve posted before and received some good advice and I’m probably only posting this to get it out of my system but...
My son is nearly two and a half. He slept 12 hours a night till he hit two from being about six months old - and before that he was sleeping all night from 8 weeks. Therefore this is all a bit difficult for me.
He’s in a bed and we were at a stage where he’d get into bed, say night night and then that would be it till he came in to us in the morning. About two months ago he stopped going to bed at night without kicking up an almighty fuss. It then hit a point where one of us would sit there till he fell asleep. I put it down to bad dreams or regression and thought it would just pass. It hasn’t.
Over Christmas he started coming into our bed in the night anywhere between two and four. Then it was one. Then midnight. Then the other night 11pm. Which I drew the line at.
We saw HV the other day for his two year check and she suggested a stair gate on his door and disappearing chair method. However I have tried the disappearing thing and all he did was climb out of bed and try and drag me back, kick off massively and then I’d end up back in his room or dh would. I couldn’t handle ds screaming in my ear - and he does.
Tonight we decided controlled crying - so five then ten then fifteen etc. We put him to bed at just after seven, he had his story, I said night night and tucked him in and left.
He’s still awake now and has somehow managed to stand at the gate screaming for an hour “lay down mummy”. It hasn’t let up at all - I wouldn’t have the energy for that so no idea where he gets it. Dh is up there now because it’s just ridiculous how long he has managed to keep this up.
I’ve gone from sitting in the dark in his room for an hour hearing lay down mummy over and over again to hearing him scream it downstairs. He stops the instant you set foot on the stairs and gets into bed fine. Leave and it all starts again. And all I can think is what time is he going to wake in the night shouting of me. He woke up at four am and happily got back into bed when I gave him a dummy as he’d knocked all his on the floor. I just don’t know what to do about this awful awful problem at bedtime. I end up sitting in his room - usually at least 45 minutes if not more - and then desperately trying to creep out without hearing “lay down mummy” again. I don’t lay on his bed or even lean on it!! I am literally sitting on the floor in the pitch black - I doubt he can even see me.
He only naps if he needs to on weekends and CM has shortened it a lot as she has a new baby starting and therefore won’t have a space for him to nap when there’s three kids there two days a week.
He’s finally gone to sleep now - dh sat in there for five minutes....
I don’t know what to do or how to handle this or anything!! Do I just have to ride this out till he decides he can do it himself? I don’t actually mind sitting in his room while he sleeps - I stick a podcast on and wait - but it’s the fact I can be in there an hour and then struggle to get out without him waking! This is honestly the hardest thing I have gone through since he was born - newborn ds slept better than this!! I know we haven’t helped by allowing him to stay in our bed when he came in but sometimes it was either that or no sleep and going to work zombified. I hate hearing him cry but I feel like I’m being controlled at times which I know is mad!
Is it a case of solve the staying in own bed in the night and then tackling bedtime? It’s felt good just to get this down if I’m honest.