10 week old will not sleep at night HELP!!

[Tails5290]

My 10 week olds sleeping habits are leaving me exhausted.
So this is baby no.3 and my first 2 were angels compared to this baby.
His day time naps are ok and can even self soothe and send himself off to sleep in his rock n play in the day but night time comes and it's a whole new ballgame.
We have a strict bedtime routine. Bath, baby massage, feed in the dark and then sleep time about 7.30 and this has been in place since day 1. We will fall asleep on me and I will put him down, and within 20 mins he is wide awake and then I will rock/feed him to sleep and he will wake again, this will go on through the night. I've tried co sleeping or in his bed and it makes no difference he is still awake squirming. He has infant gaviscon as he has reflux but things have been a lot better since he has been on it and is a very happy content baby in the day and rarely sick after feeds anymore. I don't know what I am doing wrong, this is my 3rd child, I should know what I'm doing but instead I feel so clueless and helpless. Any advice would be so greatly received

I think 7.30 is quite early for that age, mine would be bed time much later and then would sleep for about 5 hours from 11pm then have a feed then another 4-5 hours!

It's a tricky age as you can't really reduce day time naps !

Also try a white noise app or some quiet music or a fan , dd never slept solidly when silent !

You aren't doing anything wrong, you just happened to get lucky with your first two.

Sorry!

Thank you for your reply.

It probably is too early but I'm so exhausted by then I'm just desperate to get into bed. If I was to make bedtime later what time should I let him nap until in the evenings?

We have a my hummy and a white noise app that plays continuously all night, I don't know if it makes a difference or not but too scared to turn it off I case things get even worse

Doesn’t help your situation but with my currently 11 week old DC3 I’d never dream of trying to get him in bed that early. He cluster feeds all evening and then nods off on me about 10.30pm. I put him in his basket and he’ll sleep there for about 3-4 hours then he’s in bed with me feeding/wriggling around for the rest of the night. I gave up trying to get babies to sleep at night along time ago and just accepted that they would deep when they want to and not when I deduce they should.

I also think 7.30 is really early at that age. We used to keep ours downstairs with us until we went to bed.

My guess is his gaviscon and whatever formula/breast milk is not enough to treat his reflux. GPs are very keen to prescribe this. We went straight to a private paed gastroenterologist when mine had it. Reflux is normally linked to milk allergy. We were prescribed ranitidine medecine and Althera formula, a hydrolysed formula in first instance. She was better but still not well so got changed to liquid omeprazole and Alfamino, a completely hypoallergenic formula and had a new baby. She was on this til she overcame her milk allergy at 1 year old. It was a hellish journey and I feel sorry that it took us three months nearly to get the formula and medecine right. Please see a specialist ASAP as GPs are not licensed to prescribe these things and, Gaviscon, the specialist told me , is not very effective and constipated many babies. Two friends who breastfed also had to change to specialist dairy free formula even after giving up dairy.

X posted, I would just let him sleep whenever he wants at that age, no waking from naps etc

Could he be dairy/gluten intolerant?

My little one was given infant gavison but it was only after cutting out dairy (breastfed) that he was able to settle at night. Daytimes weren’t as bad, it was only nights where I felt like I was up all night and he was in pain/unsettled x

Thanks littlemisssunshine, it looks like I don't know what I'm doing haha! My second was sleeping from 7.30/8-4am by this age so was trying to start as I mean to go on, obviously this one does not agree. 2 weeks ago he was sleeping on my chest from about 8.30/9 and sleeping for 7 hours and then it all went down hill.

I'm trying not to feed him too much more than normal in the evenings as he ends up giving himself tummy ache and I'm currently combined feeding, he has 2 expressed bottles a day, bf at night and formula for 3/4 feeds

Have you tried putting a tshirt DH has worn as the sheet in his crib? They sometimes settle better with the familiar smell.

Another one saying that you’re not doing anything wrong, you’ve just been really lucky so far.

Coukd you still do the bath, massage and feed but keep him with you until you go to bed?

If you think he has reflux, has tongue tie been ruled out?

My first son had a milk allergy, and I've tried cutting out dairy from my diet and it made no difference, he's so happy in the day, and he is happy to lay flat talking and playing so I told myself he couldn't have a milk allergy or severe reflux as I just assumed he'd be unhappy a lot more. I've started to notice the gaviscon is giving him constipation.
As for dh clothing, dh doesn't have very much interaction with him as he works very long hours and we've recently just separated, so I'm not sure he's really recognise his scent. Thank you all so much for taking time to reply, I have spent the last couple of weeks second guessing absolutely everything I do and the only thing that keeps me sane is searching mumsnet forums

I deffo think 7.30 is a bit early for that age, my son is 11 weeks and has started sleeping all night but he goes down anywhere from 9pm-10pm

The difference I've noticed in him sleeping all night is using a sleeping bag instead of a blanket

In the day does he have more bottles?

Just wondering about tongue tie. My dd has tongue tie which was missed several times. She would wake every 20 mins at night because she couldn’t get a decent latch when breastfeeding. As a result she’d take down air and would wake up mid sleep cycle as she had wind. I’d have to wind her after every single feed! If I didn’t, she’d wake up after 20 mins guaranteed.

Sorry to hear about your split, that must be tough

If need DC3 to be settled in the evening while you see to the other 2, could you put him in a sling? I know it’s a bit of a MN cliche but it helped us

I'm definitely putting him to bed too early by the sounds of things so that is the first thing to change tomorrow. He is out for the count now next to me in bed, so I will leave him for tonight (I'm sure he'll be awake soon anyway).

I have a sling, and we use it when I have housework to do so will definitely try that in the evening!

With the tongue tie, he has put on a lot of weight but is so windy, I have to wind him a lot, at least 3 times per feed otherwise he has terrible tummy ache. I will ask my hv to check.

My first had tongue tie that was missed by just about everyone too Believe. Have a read of [[http://milkmatters.org.uk/2011/04/15/hidden-cause-feeding-problems/ this] Tails

Have you seen the Baby Sleep Info Site too? It’s all evidence based so you can reply on it

I think my DC1’s tt was missed because he was gaining weight, but he was only gaining because he was feeding 24/7!

I think my DC1’s tt was missed because he was gaining weight, but he was only gaining because he was feeding 24/7!

Same here!!! I remember posting on MN in the early hours of yet another horrendous night and some lovely people suggested TT.

I found a BF counsellor who specialises in TT, she diagnosed it within seconds!! I’d had 11 long weeks of hell and wept with relief after that first feed when dd had been snipped. I really noticed the difference.

I've just looked up tongue tie and he does make a funny clicking noise when he feeds, would I need a dr to assess wether he has it? He doesn't feed a massive amount (4 ounces every 2/3 hours in the day) but he's definitely happier on the bottle and seems frustrated on the boob so that's partly why he's been having mostly bottles lately

I would find a specialist not a general doctor for tongue tie...

I wouldn’t bother with the Dr if you can. Almost all HCPs have had no training on infant feeding and most can’t spot a tt if it’s staribg then in the face. You could show your GP this article and ask to be referred for a tt assessment.

Have a look at the tongue tie practioners too and have you got a Bfing Support Group near to you’ll? They should be able to help