Letting baby create own routine

[ellasmum]

Hi..

My DD is now 16 weeks old and I am at my wits end - I have tried various things (including GF) and I still do not seem to have a schedule.

I am clueless what her feeding cycle is as I am still feeding her when she gets really cross.

I would love to know from Mums who have let baby decide their own routine how they did it. In particular the sleep issue - I can tell DD is tired so go to put her in the cot for a nap but she just screams unless I feed her to sleep - she then only naps for 45 minutes max. Sometimes I can get her back to sleep again by picking her up and patting her but more often than not it doesn't work.

I feel so sorry for DD as she is obviously not getting enough sleep day or night and looks exhausted. I am happy for her to find her own rythum but need to be able to get her to go to sleep

hi ellasmum. Glad I could be of some help. I read in one of the many books possibly GF about them not having enough control to comfort themselves with there thumb until at least 4 months with DD it was about 5mths. Now shes very skilled and it definately makes it easier to put her down when tired, obviously a big comfort to her (unless she is cross and then she'll scream the place down) Glad your going home to get some help and dont worry about feeding her to sleep if it helps, it helps. Its unlikely that you'll be feeding DD to sleep when she's 25yrs old, it'll right itself in the end. I'm sure you'll feel better and more able to cope after a bit of a break - even if its just the satisfaction that DD screams worse for anyone else!

Ames - thanks for the support.

You are so right about feeding to sleep. I keep telling DP that at least Ella won't be going to school unable to get to sleep on her own!! Well I hope not anyway.

The thumb sucking seems to work in stroller and car but not at home which is very frustrating. Hopefully she will keep at it and it will work eventually.

Have you tried cherry-teat dummies? They are the only ones our dd will take. You might not think such a little thing would make a difference but it does.

Hi there, Another book by a US paediatrician says you can get a baby to take a dummy by putting it in, and the minute you get a hint of a suck you gently pull the dummy - apparently the baby tends to try and suck it back in. Do this a few times and it trains the baby to use the dummy. Never needed this myself - ds was like a heat-seeking missile with his! As a young baby his sleep was extremely erratic and he didn't sleep through for seven months. A nightmare at the time, but sort of forgotten now. IT WILL GET BETTER! Get some help and try to rest yourself. Frankly, your sleep is more important than hers (you won't believe me now, but you will later...)

Well, I must have completely misread Tracy Hogg. I think I gave up when she told me to keep a written log of how long ds spent on each breast. Hmm. You can tell her mother brought up her kids.

BTW, how did you find her? I found her style v twee/fake English - like horrible Daphne on Frasier.

I actually really liked Tracy when I met her in person. However I know exactly what you mean about her style in the book. When I read it I used to think 'There is no way I could say that to a baby'.

She is very down to earth and doesn't seem to be too affected by 10 years in California. She does slip in a few famous names she has worked with. She is very discreet though - shame, I wanted gossip on the stars and their kids!!!