Babes who would only sleep in arms- how did you manage to stop this and how old were they?

[MrsHealey]

My DD is 7 weeks and suffering from silent reflux. We're just starting to get the pain reduced for her but we are struggling to get her to sleep alone.

For those of you whose babes would only sleep on your or your partners, how did you get them to sleep alone and at what age? Im keen to start any habits we can whilst the reflux symptoms calm down as im desperate to stop co-sleeping as it makes me anxious. And my DH and I would love some time with each other!

Thanks

Oh I know this. I think it was at that age that I turned up at the gp at my wits end. We had a refluxy baby too, he’s still very sicky at 4 months but it does get better.

My take: ignore other babies with their miraculous lying flat on their backs, and people who say ‘just put him down to sleep’. Yeah I’ll do that if I want a crying baby covered in vomit.

Here’s what we do/ did:
Bednest cot, tilted.
Feed with head higher than bum.
Keep upright (and still) for 20 mins post feed. Practically that means that often I fall asleep with him on me in bed. This is not safe co-sleeping. I’ve made my peace with it, he wakes every 2 hours to feed. This way i get more sleep.
In an ideal world, I feed, hold then transfer to cot whilst he’s sleeping.
Wheatbag to warm cot before he goes down. I lower him making sure he doesn’t drop and keep my body close. I shush and keep my hand on his stomach.
White noise playing (on my phone) before I put him down in the cot.
I’m sure the ‘just put him down’ are rolling their eyes. They’re all welcome to come babysit ;)
We also have a baby go to sleep playlist, more for us as we dance him to sleep.
We have the spare room as an option for one of us if we can’t settle once he’s back asleep. My boyfriend pretty much sleeps through unless I wake him so it gets used less now.
We used to use infant gaviscon, when he couldn’t lie flat even when tilted. We used it once a dat with the last feed of the evening, to help him stay asleep for the first stretch. Use an oral syringe with a breastfed baby.
Judicious use of a dummy sometimes helps smooth the transition to cot.

It does really get better, and we saw improvements soon after we adjusted how we managed the reflux. Time helps. But, he is a baby that even now I don’t lie down much. He’s never flat, and I suspect refluxy babies are always going to be more keen on being held. It will pass. I’m seeing signs that he can self settle, despite my bad habits.

mammagotmoves - I feel like you are describing my life, except with eczema as well as teething and reflux. LG is 9 months and the last two months have been hell sleep wise and we're just about to do the move into the separate room to see if it improves things. Fingers crossed! I also don't want to sleep train but naps are almost always out and about in the buggy or in my arms as she just screams in the cot in the day and everything that works at bedtime or in the night (shhh pat) does nothing. Weird.

How is yours doing on solids? Ours is rubbish - wondered if when she (finally) cracks that the sleeping might be extended too.

It’s actually a bit of a myth that babies who eat more sleep more - obviously some do but it’s certainly not something that magically happens as babies wake in the night for a number of reasons, not just hunger. Mine is 15 months and is established on solids but only in the last couple of months has she started sleeping long stretches (she has slept through twice this week and last night she woke a few times).

Just started happening naturally at around 8-10 months