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Original poster

Bath time makes baby hyper before bed - change of bedtime routine

96 replies

Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 07:42

Anyone else experience this? For weeks we've noticed 5mo DS gets very difficult to settle before bed. Its been taking up to 90mins from getting to our room. His arms flail and he chats, stares at the ceiling, curtain, any light in the room (we make it as dark as poss but have a groegg and night light which make shadows). He feeds well but then gets very cranky which either results in me trying to bounce and shush or feed (which ultimately results in comfort feeding). This really does take 60-90min so added on to his bath means hes awake for 3 + hours.

We thought it was overtiredness but have really been nailing the naps atm. Hes stopped feeding to sleep for naps and going down alone. Night times are a nightmare in comparison. Albeit he cant self settle and wakes 5 or 6 times.

His routine is roughly

6-7am wake up
Nap 1 hour 15 later
Awake 1.30 - 1.45
Nap

Repeat irrespective of number of naps until 7-8pm where we would take up for bath, massage, story and feed before bed.

I'm thinking we may need to ditch the evening bath which is shame for both daddy and for a routine hes used to.

Did anyone else have similar and did you find a good routine minus the bath??

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Marcine · 02/03/2018 09:19

Generally 7pm bedtimes as we need to be up at 7am to leave the house by 8.30pm. It fits into the national routine or work, school etc.

ijustwannadance · 02/03/2018 09:23

Bath him in the morning. If it wakes him up at night then what's the point.

There's also no need to bath a baby every day.

DetectiveDog · 02/03/2018 09:23

I think I’d try to not let him fall asleep at 4.45 at all although I know that’s hard! Mine wasn’t a good napper at all so I’m no expert by the way. I think your options are cut out that late nap but maybe start the bedtime routine earlier. Or still have the late nap but then bedtime just has to be later in the evening. Also if you do think the bath is too stimulating, you could do it at a different time of day - no law to say it has to be bedtime. Finally - I think at that age they just do take a long time to go to sleep sometimes as they’re still learning to self settle. I’m sure my DS was like that for quite a long time - bedtime was a long drawn out affair! Tedious!

Battleax · 02/03/2018 09:29

If you don’t have SIDS experience or anything similarly sad, maybe try not going up with him? Different things work for different babies.

TittyGolightly · 02/03/2018 09:30

Generally 7pm bedtimes as we need to be up at 7am to leave the house by 8.30pm. It fits into the national routine or work, school etc.

I get that. In our case we didn’t need to do that until DD went to school. It wasn’t a problem. (I had people telling me when she was 3 months old that she needed to be in bed by 7pm ready for when she went to school.)

Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 09:31

Yeah tbh I think it just that detective dog. Keep the nap and then we can stay downstairs with him til later and go up together for 9pm bed time or scrap it and carry on going to bed at 6-7pm.

Its only a month but me and DH are going a bit dollaly going to bed in silence for 7pm....

Btw its only 7am wake up because that's when he wakes up! Used to be 8am but now its 7. Today 6am but thats an oddball.

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Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 09:34

So for arguments sake (because clearly I am crap at this) a nap ending 6pm say would mean bedtime 9pm because I have been going for 2 hour gaps but you think longer before bed? So up for bath at 8.30 maybe.

I guess I just have to try!!

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Marcine · 02/03/2018 09:34

My 7 year old still wakes up at 7am on the dot, regardless of what time he goes to bed, even at Christmas Grin
For me the 7pm bedtime is perfect for getting some child free time in the evening.

Marcine · 02/03/2018 09:36

DD manages more like 2.5 hours awake before bed, but yours might do 3. It should be your longest awake time of the day though.

hiptobeasquare · 02/03/2018 09:43

Do you have to stay in the room when the baby is asleep for the first 6 months?! Can you not leave a monitor on? I know to keep the baby in our bedroom, but I thought I could put them to bed and come back downstairs. I am pregnant at the moment and my health visitor didn’t mention that- I have a toddler but he was 6 months when we adopted him.

Marcine · 02/03/2018 09:45

If you want to follow sids guidelines then you should be in the same room for all sleeps until 6 months. Monitors haven't been shown to reduce sids.

TittyGolightly · 02/03/2018 09:48

Do you have to stay in the room when the baby is asleep for the first 6 months?! Can you not leave a monitor on? I know to keep the baby in our bedroom, but I thought I could put them to bed and come back downstairs.

Babies can forget to breathe when they are in deep sleep. Having an adult close to them helps them to regulate their breathing. A monitor doesn’t replace that.

TittyGolightly · 02/03/2018 09:50

My 7 year old still wakes up at 7am on the dot, regardless of what time he goes to bed, even at Christmas grin
For me the 7pm bedtime is perfect for getting some child free time in the evening.

I’m an owl. My evening doesn’t end till 1-2am, so a late bedtime was perfect for us. DH worked away so we had to just do what worked. Don’t know what I’d have done with a lark!

DD has seen in every new year, doesn’t struggle too much with jet lag and we can share a hotel room no problem (seem to be common issues for those with more “normal” routines on here.)

WheresTheEvidence · 02/03/2018 09:52

By 5/6 months I aim to have babies in a nap routine such as

7am wake (1hr 40 wake time)
845/9 nap (40/60 minute nap) (2hr wake time)
11.30 nap (longer nap) (2.5 hr wake time)
3.30/4 cat nap (No more than 30 minutes)
Bedtime 7pm but in bed anytime between 6.30/7 if showing sleep cues.

That last nap is too late and causing a knock on effect.

hiptobeasquare · 02/03/2018 09:52

Thanks, I stupidly hadn’t realised that. I have read up on it, but I wasn’t thinking about it properly, I’ve been so stressed out about how I’m going to manage two babies that I hadn’t thought about it in reality.

Marcine · 02/03/2018 09:57

I'd be a night owl through choice but unfortunately having a job gets in the way!

TittyGolightly · 02/03/2018 09:59

I’ve only recently returned to the 9-5 and I’m not gonna lie - I hate that 6:45am alarm!

Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 10:14

Thanks all i will start spacing his naps better. Really helpful.

@Marcine if you use 7pm onwards as adult time are you leaving LO alone? Or are they older?

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Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 10:15

Wish they came with manuals....i feel stupid all the time Sad

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Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 10:16

Sorry just seen shes 5.5mths

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Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 10:26

More thick questions:

-It doesnt matter really if we stick with that nap and put him to bed at 9pm does it - i mean other than he may wake later in the morn and we will need to adjust prior to my return to work?

-What do people do for baby free time in the evening?? I am fully going with SIDS but by gum Id love to watch abit of tv sometimes...

Today he may need four naps for waking up so early Confused

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Marcine · 02/03/2018 10:30

Yeah I started leaving her alone for naps and in the evening about a month ago. We don't have any other risk factors.
Er...my baby free evenings are mostly clearing up, putting older ones to bed, doing homework, making packed lunches, catching up on paper work and hopefully watching some Netflix Grin

TittyGolightly · 02/03/2018 10:34

It doesnt matter really if we stick with that nap and put him to bed at 9pm does it - i mean other than he may wake later in the morn and we will need to adjust prior to my return to work?

If course it doesn’t matter. As long as he’s getting enough sleep and is happy it’s fine.

Original poster
Jellybabie3 · 02/03/2018 10:35

Lol its just the fact you have free time!! Amazing! I can only do stuff when hes awake (naps on me alot but were getting there) so i also feel guilty for not playing with him. Tbf as he wakes 5/6 times a night i am shattered by 8pm but I wouldnt mind watching the odd movie or whatever with DH (also known as the man i live with but rarely communicate except by text Sad)

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BikeRunSki · 02/03/2018 10:35

Bath him in the morning?