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Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

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Original poster

What do you do in the evening with your baby and their routine?? I would like to go to bed later than 7pm....

29 replies

Jellybabie3 · 03/01/2018 19:10

My DS is 3 months old. Up until now we have bathed, massaged and fed him and put him to bed starting from 7pm onwards. We have him in a sleepyhead which is inside a next to me cot. Because of this i have been going to bed at the same time as him and just watching some tv there while he feeds and sleeps until his final feed at 10/11 pm when i also put my head down. Now it's a new year and hes older i would really like to not got to bed so early BUT ds will not sleep by himself in his sleepyhead downstairs - no idea why!! Only on me or husband.

Any suggestions? Or what do you do so you get some time in the eve?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

OperaPanda · 03/01/2018 19:17

I'm a FTM of a 7w old so not much experience but trying to think with you.

If baby doesn't sleep downstairs, is there any difference that could explain that, something you could change? (lightning, noise?).

Or could you do the same routine but leave baby upstairs with a video monitor just for this last stretch? We're setting up a routine and that's what we want to do with LO - not implemented yet as she's just started cluster feeding 9-11pm this week.

NerrSnerr · 03/01/2018 19:25

Before both of ours was 6 Months they just dozed and fed on my lap until I went to bed. We didn’t start any bedtime routine until after 6 Months.

Cakescakescakes · 03/01/2018 19:27

I just let them sleep on me until about 4 mo tha then started moving bedtime earlier.

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 03/01/2018 19:47

Hmmm ok so could wait til hes 6months old and going into his own room?? Just sit him on our laps til we go up?

I could use a monitor but would have to fork out for a fancier one.

OP posts:

123456kent · 03/01/2018 23:13

Ebay for a monitor?
Sounds like it’s all going well, you just need to be downstairs enjoying your evening.
My baby is 11 weeks and we do bed time routine (which doesnt go too well), into sleepyhead in our room, then downstairs. Usually back up and down approx 3 times, then she settles and we watch tv (OH does anyway, I watch the monitor worrying she’s going to cry all evening) until we go to bed.
Worth the investment

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 04/01/2018 06:39

So you all have video monitors? I literally have a walkie talkie like one

OP posts:

Cantchooseaname · 04/01/2018 06:44

Does he sleep from 7-10? Can you settle him upstairs in Moses type basket, then once he is out bring him down with you?
The advice is to be in same room until 6 months.

winterwonderlandy · 04/01/2018 06:45

I put my first baby up to bed around 7pm with a monitor (not a video one) from 6 weeks and checked on them regularly. My second baby is now 8 weeks and I'm going to start doing the same in the next day or two now that Christmas is out of the way. If it makes you feel better then get a cheap video monitor from eBay or gumtree but I don't think it's essential. I'd recommend using the baby sleeping bags rather than blankets if you don't do already so you're not worrying about blankets coming loose.

TipseyTorvey · 04/01/2018 06:50

We had an Angel breathing monitor and a video monitor so I could see them and know they were breathing. That meant i could at least get an hour or so to eat dinner with two hands. I was so knackered then that I usually went to be by 9 anyway!

Topsyloulou · 04/01/2018 06:51

We've just started a bed time routine with 8 week old DD. She was settling for the night around 8pm & then we were disturbing her when we took her up to bed when we went. DS, 3, goes to bed at 7 so we get DS ready for bed at the same time & she'll go in the bath with him as well if it's bath night. He goes to bed & DD comes back downstairs for her last feed & then when she's sleepy we take her up & put her in her crib, normally around 8. We have a video monitor & breathing mat so we switch those on. I'm normally in bed by 9.30 so she's not on her own long.

mummydoc123 · 04/01/2018 07:01

We didn't really have evening routine till much later and bub spent most evenings on top of me before we went upstairs together around 10 ish. This started to change around 6 months ish and we got an evening routine gradually brought in and bed time for bub brought forward. Everyone does it differently. For what it's worth I only had walkie talkie monitor for 1st and never used for 2nd as could clearly hear bub crying in house without it! We've also just moved 2nd bub into own room at 15 months whereas 1st was there at 6 months. Different babies, different needs. Good luck xx

RefuseTheLies · 04/01/2018 07:04

My dd just used to sleep on me or dh in the evenings until we went to bed. We had a moses basket downstairs that we’d put her in to sometimes (but that lead to her waking up, more often than not). Then everyone to bed around 10.30pm after a dream feed.

I was (am) totally pfb, so if my dd was napping or sleeping, I was always in the same room as her until she was 6 months old.

Candyfloss1122 · 04/01/2018 07:07

We did this with our DD, went to bed when she did. We continued doing this until she was around 5 months and then would head downstairs once she was settled for a few hours.

I would strongly advice against undoing all your good work and keeping bay downstairs with you until you go to bed. You have instilled some really good habits and markers for sleep, why undo it now?

Either get a monitor so you can watch baby whilst downstairs, or stick with it a little bit longer. That would be my advice.

Need2morehands · 04/01/2018 07:08

This is the exact same as my ds2 he's almost 6 months old and has never slept downstairs anywhere other then on us but upstairs he's fine although he's poorly at the moment so it's usually us again. We have a monitor and that works fine for us.

GeekyWombat · 04/01/2018 07:13

If you have a tablet / phone can you use a video monitor app? I used one called baby monitor 3G. From memory it cost about £2.99 on iOS - I left the iPad upstairs and then set up a parent monitor from my phone. It kicks in with any noise and you can view the camera as needed. We were in a similar position of not wanting to spend money when we’d only need it for a month or two and it was a good solution.

fastfrank · 04/01/2018 07:16

We have a video monitor for our twins. They're 4.5 months, they have their last feed around 7pm and are asleep upstairs by 8. They usually sleep until about 5-6am.

dorislessingscat · 04/01/2018 07:27

How long does he take to get to sleep? Can you leave him then?

Nessalina · 04/01/2018 07:56

This is what I did with DS (now 3) - darkened room from 7pm until he was 6 months old. I was worried I was being PFB, but he didn't sleep as well downstairs, and I didn't want to leave him due to SIDS guidelines. Monitors don't make a difference, the reduction in SIDS risk is due to someone being in the room, so for me it was not negotiable. Amazon Prime / Netflix was my saviour! Once he was sleeping a good chunk, 7-10 ish, then DH would switch with me a couple of nights a week, and I'd sometimes head out with friends for the evening, and that helped a lot to break the monotony!
DD is now 3 months and I'm conscious that we haven't got her in any bedtime routine yet, I pop her down when I go up at 10ish, but she sleeps til 10am, which isn't going to work with DS's early bird schedule, so I think I need to start getting her down earlier. Back to the darkened room I guess! Luckily I've saved up The Crown and Stranger Things to work my way through

Nessalina · 04/01/2018 08:02

I realise I sound a bit precious there - I totally get that some folks are happy to monitor baby and be nearby in another room. Especially with DC2+ it may not be possible to do it any other way with dinner to cook / chores / life etc! Many others have baby in their own room before 6 months due to sleep issues on one side or the other. But I didn't mind being with him and leaving him alone wasn't for me, and it'll be the same with DD so I do feel your frustration OP!

ValentineFizz · 04/01/2018 08:13

We started a bedtime routine with DS a couple of weeks ago at 6 weeks old....

Bathtime at 8, feed/burp/change til around 9 and then into his moses basket in our dark bedroom with Ewan the sheep and video monitor/breathing mat. I then go downstairs and DH and l get some adult time for an hour or so.

Actual sleep time varies depending on cluster feeding etc but as long as we hit the bath at 8 we can all get to bed at a reasonable time and get some adult "me time" too.

Last night he settled just before 10 and didn't wake until 5.30 this morning! As he sleeps longer I will gradually bring bathtime forward but this is working for us just now.

ValentineFizz · 04/01/2018 08:17

I would also say that having the tv on in our room means he takes longer to settle and go to sleep, so we found that dimming the lights and tv off when he comes out of the bath means he does drop off quicker.

littledinaco · 04/01/2018 08:24

The peak risk for SIDS is age 2-4 months. A monitor won’t stop this (even a breathing one).

Obviously everyone makes their own decisions but just have a read behind why they should sleep in the same room as you up until 6 Months, etc before deciding to leave upstairs with a monitor.

I let them sleep on me downstairs. Their sleep changes anyway so I wouldn’t worry about getting into bad habits. It’s a lovely age where you can sit and watch telly with them fast asleep on you.

tirednotsoyummuy · 04/01/2018 08:40

Hey, my baby is 4 months now and we have the exact same set up (sleepyhead in bedside cot).

Around that age I found it changed and the conditions had to be right for him to sleep, so if we bought him downstairs there was way too much stimulation and he couldn't settle.

We bought a monitor with a video camera and started the bedtime routine at 6 in bed by 7 as he just wont really stay up past then, also same as you was sick of going to bed so early and felt really distant from my partner.

It's much nicer now as we have an evening, can keep an eye on the baby and go to bed when we want (still very early!)

crazycatlady5 · 04/01/2018 09:10

Just keep him downstairs until you go to bed. This worked for us until around 6/7 months when everything became too distracting then we started a bedtime routine.

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 04/01/2018 11:57

Ok thanks. i think i will stay with him based on sids and establish a routine at 6mths. Those that do this do you still bath at say 7 and go back down or wait to bathe when you go to bed or is that too late?

OP posts:

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