Anyone else's 8 week old baby in their own room?

[DuRezidal]

Our DD, who is almost 6 years old, went into her own room when she was 3 weeks old because i have terrible insomnia and even though she was sleeping I was not getting more than 2 hours. I would literally spend all night listening to her breathing and wriggling and I could not sleep.

I take sleeping tablets (prescribed) when it gets really bad as it's the only way to break the cycle but don't like taking these when I have a young baby.

When I had my son I did my best to keep him in the bedroom with me for longer. At 6 weeks i caved and put our little boy in his own room and he has slept so much better without me obviously disturbing him. He went from sleeping 3 hour cycles to almost 6 hour cycles a few nights (mostly 4-5 hour cycles) from the night he went in his own room. Then we went on holiday last week where he had to sleep with us again, and he dropped down to 3 hours again.

Does anyone else have their very young baby in their own room?

I would love to have him in the room with me, to be able to hear his noises and him able to be near me, but I cannot function on 2 hours of sleep I feel like I miss out on those initial 6 months of co-sleeping.

I thought they had to stay in the same room as you for 6 months? Even for naps, My DD is 7 weeks old and still wakes up every 3/4 hours because she wants a bottle. Me personally I couldn't sleep knowing she was in another room this young

Plenty of people do but I didn’t due to the SIDS Risk. One of mine was a very noisy sleeper and I used to use ear plugswhen particularly bad to keep Smaller noises down.

That sounds like a very difficult situation if you can't sleep in same room as baby. I would personally worry that you are sleeping through them waking when they are in another room. It seems odd to revert back to every 3 hours only when in the room with you. My DS wakened every 3 hours for a long long time.

My DS went into his own room at 7 weeks. However it was the adjoining room and we kept both bedroom doors open all night.

He's now a strapping 11 year old.

My baby is 4 months and is not in his own room.

My DS went into his own room at 8 weeks, as we found we all disturbed each other.

We had a baby monitor and also where his cot was positioned he was actually closer to me than when it was in our room (albeit with a thin wall between us)

My health visitor did say the recommended age was 6 months but then also said each family had to find what best suited them.

Mine didn’t, but if you need it, do it. If you’re worried about sids, get a movement monitor too.

7 months for both. I was shit scared of SIDS so just put up with it. It was hard, mind. I took the side off the cot and lashed it to my bedframe and many a time I spent sleeping half in/half out of my own bed.

I found earplugs helped. The shit ones, where they only half work. You hear sharp noises but not their snuffling so you can actually drop off.

That sounds tough but the SIDS risk is a problem. Can’t your partner share with baby to let you sleep?

DS went into his own room on day 2. I just couldn't sleep with him there.

As long as you have a good monitor then it should be fine. Maybe look at the angelcare ones with the mat that goes under the baby?

People will berate you but honestly you need to do what works for you. You can't function with no sleep, it is not healthy for you or the baby.

My dd slept in a separate room from day 1 for naps because otherwise she simply wouldn't sleep in the day. We only had a. Small flat so she was never more than a few feet from me. We were in the same room at night because it was a 1 bed flat.

Good luck!

Could you sleep in the spare room and the baby stay with his dad?

Do you have a partner? If so maybe he could sleep in the same room as the baby and you could sleep in a separate one.

Or try ear plugs as PP suggested.

IIRC the SIDS risks decreases significantly from 4 months so I would try to wait until then before leaving baby alone (no adult) if I were you.

No, I always want my young babies next to me so I know they’re ok. I have the angelcare monitors to check breathing etc.. enables me to sleep without anxiety

I don't think monitors make any difference to SIDS risk.

No, monitors make no difference as it’s your breathing and movements that are said to reduce the risk of SIDS and the baby going into a really deep sleep. Movement monitors,although reassuring, make no difference to risks either.

Not saying the movement ones are bad though, dd is 1 and Still wears one that clips to her nappy

If your breathing and movements reduce the risk of SIDS, is this affected if you use white noise?

I read that white noise can reduce it, not sure where now but I will try and find it!

I did what Ellboo said a lot of the time and DD slept in the room with DH. I was on such high alert to the noises I couldn't sleep. I would often wake before DH when I was down th hallway with the door pushed to and ear plugs in (he was in the bedroom). It's so frustrating! We didn't make it quite to 6 months in the end.

A couple of people have suggested using a monitor with a movement sensor, and I just wanted to point out that those monitors don’t prevent SIDS, they just alert you if it’s happened. So while they give some peace of mind in that you can act immediately if your baby stops breathing, they obviously can’t prevent it happening in the first place.

I think it’s up to parents to weigh up the level of risk they’re comfortable with. There are various factors affecting SIDS risks and room sharing is just one. I wouldn’t have been comfortable leaving DS alone before 6 months but wouldn’t judge others for doing so.

From looking at the lullaby trust website, it’s recommended that babies are in your room until 6 months even for naps as newborns need the rhythm of your breathing to help them regulate theirs. The angel Care monitor won’t stop or reduce risk of SIDS, it will just alert you if they stop breathing/heart beating. Can the baby go in the same room as a sibling? Or as others suggest with Dad? SIDS risk is highest between 4 and 16 weeks. Obviously you will get loads of people saying ‘oh my little one was in his own room from word go and he is now a strapping rugby player etc’ and of course they are correct. However it’s whether you think it’s worth the risk. Lots of people smoke and drink during pregnancy and before 1970’s drank and drive without seatbelts and rode bikes without helmets and lived to tell the tale... but there is a reason why seatbelts and cycle helmets were invented. it’s all about whether you think it’s worth the risk?

Thinking around the problem... Can your DP share a room with your baby for a couple of months maybe? Being in the same room reduces the SIDS risk IIRC it helps to regulate their breathing when they're in with you.

Cross post!

You never need to apologise or worry for the perfectly reasonable decisions you make in relation to your own baby.

People these days seem to think guidelines equal some kind of religious law from God. They're just guidelines as they're based on stats and the vast majority of the time deviating from them is no issue whatsoever.