Can I teach an 18m old to self settle? ?

[Zombiemama]

Dd is almost 18m doesn't know how to self settle because iv never let her! Reflux baby first time mum terrified of vomiting and choking etc so iv always lain with her to put her off to sleep.
This isn't so much a problem for me I love our snuggles and quiet time together but when she wakens in the night it's me she wants and she won't go back to sleep unless I put her in bed beside me.
Fully aware this is toaltally self inflicted and it's going to be tough but now I'm back working I know it will be good for us all if she moves into her own room and stays the full night in her cot

Any hints tips suggestions all greatly recieved success stories or will she still be in our bed at 12

20 minutes
20 minutes
20 minutes

No drama no tantrums no tears
My gorgeous little girl is sound asleep in her own cot!!! I'm still sat the bottom of her cot like a lemon just to be sure though lol

Salene iv been thinking about getting her a minnie mouse bed but her cot converts so I may just get her the quilt set instead and try her with that! That's fantastic progress for him if she wanted in at 4am it would be fine too but she looks in at 10 11pm some nights before I'm ready to even goto bed which is a disaster

Well it's been a mix of 5am/4am 1am/12am

One night I got up when I heard him starting to cry and went through and rubbed his head for 2 seconds and he was back to sleep and didn't appear to 5am

Last night he started crying at 12am and I have to be honest I couldn't be arsed getting up as 26 weeks pregnant and I was shattered and hubby away so I just shouted him to come through to see me which he happily did , prob a bad move but you know what like when you can hardly open eyes

I happy for him to come to me in night my main issue was the 2 hours lying on bed with him to get him to sleep as kept thinking this isn't gonna be possible when baby born so looks like we have mastered that

I must be honest I like him coming to bed for a cuddle 😂

Husband works away month at a time so it's nice to have him in bed

Most likely confusing him by allowing it , but for now we all happy enough

Long may it continue

I hope you get your wee one sorted too

Good luck x

I have had some good success. I put a mattress next to my 19 month old's bed (we had been co-sleeping) three days ago and she slept through the night last night! 7.15pm-6.15am! Prior to this, she was waking 1-3 times a night.

The first night I did this, she woke twice and I told her 'mummy's here' and put my hand on her back. The next night she woke once and I did the same. Last night, no wake ups. Only a week ago, she was on my boob for large parts of the night so this is big progress.

I explained to her during the day and again at bedtime that she would be in her bed (which is a mattress on the floor at the moment) and I would be in mine right next to her.

My plan is to get out of the room and back in with DH but I'm happy to take it slowly.

Zombiemama the best thing is the let your dd pick her new bed sheets/duvet set when she goes into her new bed and let her 'help' you change them. I found this helped my dd a lot, she picked boys paw patrol sheets that look so out of place in her pink girly room but whatever makes her happy lol

Not been on yesterday but its been going good. She did wake at some point last night but i just laid her dow and got back in bed. Getting loads better. But tonight she fell asleep in the car on the way home at 7pm. I was running late but ive ended up putting her in her cot in her clothes with blankets. Hoping its not going to change the night time.

Zombie that sounds amazing how was tonight?
Im a single mum so ive done everything since her dad left when she was a month old. Have to say im so glad i am because i could not deal with arguments to get some help off him! They dont understand sometimes do they! Ha bloody men!

Tonight was good asleep within about 15 minutes no dramas again tonight. She is just so hard to get completely sound when she's not snuggled up close.

Next week's challenge is getting her off to sleep with out holding my hand...

You guys are doing well. After 4 nights I've sussed our problem. Getting her to sleep requires no effort now. But she wakes every 1-2 hours at night - and it's because her dummy comes out & she's too small to put it back in.

I'm exhausted. On my knees after 4 nights of this. So. It's cold turkey tomorrow for her, dummies are going. Unless anyone can think of another way? I just can't see a way round it!!

Unintended I hope cold turkey on the dummy goes well. I'm going to organise to get rid of the dodo on a week if I'm ever out of the country lol my nerves couldn't cope. Back to near an hour tonight. No tears from her just from me. Everyone said it gets easier it takes 3 nights to cracking it. Aaagh I need the wine x

I did throw my babies dummies away 1 night when she was 4 months in the middle of the night after being up every hour for about 2 weeks solid. She went cold turkey and was great after about 3 nights but never slept well again after that. Then we fell asleep feeding her in my bed one night and she slept 8 hours, when i woke she still had the bottle in her mouth. I felt really bad in case she had bad wind but she didnt so i got her some dummies and she was about 7 months and she could put her dummy in herself then. Wish id persevered with it. She was better once she could roll onto her side though.

Zombie, Fairy - how are you? Last night was much better here - up at 2.30 & 6am wake up. I can deal with that! So now I think maybe keep the dummy?! Who bloody knows!!

Well we had the best night of going to sleep. 5 minutes no teddy or anything. Out like a light still holding my hand though...
But she's been in our bed from 9pm awful bad cough her nose is running down back of her throat so keeping her in and propped up to help her sleep. Poor wee pet it's horrible not being able to do anything to make it go away x

Mine spends 1 noght a fortnight at her dads. It was last night and he was under strict instructions. He ckaims she slept a solid 12 hours but ive never believed a word from his mouth so who knows. She is always dead clingy when i get her back so its been hard work today and it took her ages to go to sleep. Cried any time i took my hand away. But since 7.45pm ive not heard a peep so fingers crossed.

I think we're going to have to start all over again next week. Dd is so full of three cold and she has an awful cough. She went to sleep in cot last night lasted for about an hour then I had her in with me sitting up right. Her wee nose is running down her throat and making the cough worse. Tonight she was asleep in cot for maybe 20 mins before the coughing started.

So I will keep trying her off to sleep in there but I'm not going to upset either of us to she's better. Severe lack of sleep going on here at min.

Hope youse are all getting on better than us x