Toddler trying it on. Mother tempted to give in!

[tigermoth]

Our younger son, 2.5 years, has never been a great sleeper, but we've lived with it OK. He has grown out of waking up at nights pretty much, and now sleeps through for 9 or 10 hours. So what's the problem?

Well, his sleep doesn't begin till 10.00 pm at night. He's always loved his bedtime routine, bath, milk, story etc and still asks for it round about 7.30-ish. Up until a month ago, he fell asleep like clockwork when he was put down in his bed.

Now all hell has broken loose. He refuses to stay in his bed, or any other bed, and wanders downstairs the minute he is left. Not just 10 times - we're talking 30 times or more. I cannot spend two hours wearing holes in our stair carpet, because I have 7 year old son to put to bed, read with, etc etc.

However, if my toddler is allowed to stay downstairs, he is angelic. He sits still, watches TV with us or plays quietly with a toy or two. He is really no trouble. The stress comes when we try to force him to stay in his bedroom.
If I allow him to set his own sleeping time - he tells us when he wants to go to bed - he gets under the covers and is asleep in 5 minutes. But this is past 10.00 pm!

Any comments - and yes, we have cut out the day naps.

Chanel and Tigermoth, just a thought, have you considered getting blackout blinds/curtains?

Jodee - I've got blackout blinds and still find that really bright sunshine manages to sneak round the edges. Does anyone else have this problem or is it just the way I've fitted them?

Same problem I'm afarid. It's worst in DDs bedroom where the blind is inside the window. In DS's bedroom the blind covers the whole thing and it's better. DS who can talk (DD is too young for that yet) also says it's sunshine (well not today - he isn't that dim!!!) so I do have a bigger job convincing him that YES it is nightime !
So feel for you and I know what you're going through.

Just felt like writing in a cheeky way - I haven't had a glass of anything either... just in a good mood

Oh well, scrap that idea then!!

Pupuce, nothing wrong with being in a good mood, especially on such a c**p day - I was drenched twice!

Thanks for your messages. Just like to add that his childminder has stairgates, so I asked if my todder had ever climbed over them, because I was thinking of getting one for his bedroom door... She laughted out loud - he's been escaping for ages, she said. Don't waste your money

So that puts paid to my 'plan b' - the stairgate idea. Just as well a cuddle in the big bed is doing the trick. Worst thing is, I have to stop myself from falling asleep, too. Once or twice a week my older son or husband have to wake me, when things have gone suspiciously quiet.

PS Marina - snap! no chickenpox, but chocolate milk and Thomas the Tank on the video is an all too familiar combination in our house!

Having problems with dd (32months). We had excellent routine at bedtime when she was younger but then about 6 months ago she had an illness that lasted 2 months (whooping cough type virus) and we had her sleeping downstairs until we went to bed because she was being sick virtually all the time it was easier for me to have her downstairs until I went to bed. On top of that, she is a very restless sleeper because of her eczema. How on earth do I put her back to bed (and make sure she stays there!!!!) at a reasonable time (ie 8pm at the latest) without me having to lie beside her till she's asleep !

Have tried various things - last night I even tried putting the stairgate across her bedroom door so she couldn't come downstairs and she absolutely screamed blue murder - and I left her there for just over 45mins and she was sobbing her heart out so in the end I gave in and went upstairs and just lay down beside her till she was asleep - Which only took 10 mins!!! DH said I am cruel leaving her to scream like that (he left the house for the duration!) but I am dertermined that we will get back into a bedtime routine - obviously it's going to take a little bit longer than I thought.... My 11 month dd is absolutely no bother. She goes to bed at 7pm and that's her till 7 the next morning.

Help Me !!!!

Susiebabes you have my absolute sympathy - I have been there and it's awful - right down to the disapproving husband! My dd had never been a fantastic sleeper but after chickenpox aged about 27 months and being really ill and in our bed it was just hopeless. Our problem was her wanting to go to sleep in our bed and stay there all night kicking and fussing. It'd got to the stage where I had to lie with her in my bed till she fell asleep and then try and transfer her - a crap idea that never really worked - we'd also done the lying on the floor thing - often I'd fall asleep and she'd be wide awake (that's how tired I was). Anyway what worked for us was starting a whole new routine. We'd always done bath, story in bathroom and then straight to bed - pre illness. POst illness we incorporated a bit of what she wanted and did one story in our bed, one on my knee in her room and then another once she was lying down in her cot. If she kicked up a fuss we would agree to reading one very last story, but only if she stayed lying down and promised to be good?? then she would have to go to sleep. I promised I would check on her in a few minutes - and I'd leave it until I was sure she was asleep. I also bought winnie the pooh stickers and made a chart and every night she slept in her own bed she got to put some stickers on the chart and when she had 5 stickers she got chocolate (boo hiss say all the experts - but hey it worked). Can't actually remember if it worked immediately but I know it did work - and I think part of it was because she felt as if she was getting her own way even if she wasn't - I think toddlers like that don't they...Anyway she now sleeps well but I have a baby who thinks anything from 4.30 am is a good wake up time....a different thread I think. GOOD LUCK and do let me know how you get on. It will pass, I promise.