Let's all meet here for a sleep deprivation support group

[ImNotAnsweringIt]

I though it might be helpful to have a general thread with survival tips for dealing with the exhaustion and misery of the long or short term effects of lack of sleep. I bet we can all find someone worse off than ourselves, and that's always a help, hmm?

My little tips for making things more bearable:

Make sure you are warm enough when you have to get up in the night. Have dressing gown and slippers by your bed if neccesary. This also helps you get back to sleep quickly, should you be fortunate enough to have the opportunity!

Have lovely breakfast things in. I always have expensive cereal in the cupboards Just For Me.

Anyone else? Hang in there everyone, I am having a very down day today which is what inspired me to start this.

So last night looked like this (noise/ single cry almost every 40 mins but these were her 'true' wakeups):
Bed 6.30pm (no real problems)
Awake 8pm for 30 mins
Awake 9.30pm for 30 mins
Awake 11pm for 45 mins
Awake 1.30am for 45 mins
Awake 3am for 3 hours
Awake every 20 mins (at best) from 6am until 8am when DD1 woke her up)

Sorry to jump in with all this waffle, it helps to offload I think

Thanks wifey feel like I need a shoulder to cry on

DH is fab but he is feeling almost as bad as me. I talk to my mum and MIL, they say "oh yes I remember that it was awful" but that's it really (though MIL does look after DD1 some days so that really helps).

I have lots of nice friends but none that I really confide in, especially now that I am crying all the time. No-one really knows how bad I am feeling apart from DH.

Health visitor is coming out to see me tomorrow. Not sure what to expect as I'm not going to try CC or CIO so not sure how she will help. I am definately going to blub though, so I'm sure she'll tell me to go to GP. I am feeling very depressed but it is all related to lack of sleep I'm sure

Sorry, keep waffling.....!!

Waffle away thisis. That's what we are here for...have you tried sleep seperation technique? It lets baby know you are still there but not 'hands on'.

It's great the HV is coming out to you...just be honest with them. They are there to support you. It's great you do have support from DH & friends. I remember calling my HV & talking (waffling) for about 45mins & being so glad I did as she gave me some great ideas to try...supernanny is fab in our house.

I don't know what the sleep seperation technique is, though I do hide behind the cot quite a lot!

I've read the whole of Elizabeth Pantley no-cry sleep. Has anyone had any success with it? I'm not bothered about sleeping through the night, or feeding in the night tbh. I would just like her to go back to sleep easily, it's the long times being awake that is killing me. Getting up just 2 or 3 times seems like heaven to me at the moment!

Just finished eating half a jar of nutella with a spoon. The only good thing about sleep deprivation is that I seem to shed weight for fun.

Well off to bed, good luck for tonight everyone :)

SS technique is a supernanny method...I have jotted it down for another poster a few posts down... Or check it out on the supernanny website. It's made nights a lot easier in our house.
Hope you have a good night

thisis my heart really goes out to you. That sounds so tough. I have also read every page of the NCSS and I know it's supposed to be some sort of saviour book but I've not had much success with it. The only thing it's helped with is getting her to sleep for the first part of the night. I don't have to rock her to sleep any more, I can put her down awake and then settle her to sleep. It has taken 2 months of gradually changing what I was doing though. And I mostly still have to hold her hand through the cot bars or she just rolls about.

Glad your DH is a help. Have you tried all the usual co sleeping/sling during the day stuff? My DD sleeps in her cot til about midnight then in with us after that because I usually don't have the energy to re settle her. All her naps during the day are in the sling. I know this sounds ridiculous but sometimes during the day if I'm really struggling to get her to sleep I put her into the sling and wrap my dressing gown around her and me so she can't see and I stay quite and moving the whole time. Sometimes she really needs some proper sleep and that always works.

While things are tough I think take the easy path with everything that needs to be done. And don't do anything that doesn't have to be done. Me and DP have started doing days where we promise not to snap at each other or say anything mean as we've been bickering a lot just because we're tired and just thinking twice sometimes before I say something I don't mean makes the days nicer.

Thisis I am so sorry things are dreadful for you. It will get better. DS2 sometimes does that wide awake in the night thing too and it makes me feel furious with him. I want to scream at him, even though I never would and love him dearly of course! On 'Chat' at about 4am last night there was a thread called something like 'fucking to the fucking fuck to sleep' which summed up exactly how I felt Broom talks sense above. Just know you are not alone, we are all in it together.

Broom I'm sure she is uncomfortable, it is unlikely (I think) that she would keep waking like that otherwsie; sleep is such a basic biological need for babies (and us, dear God) it doesnt make evolutionary sense for a baby to just be a dreadful sleeper.

I am not suggesting aaything to worry about btw. Does she always do a burp after feeding, before sleep? Mine always wakes after 40 minutes if he hasnt brought one up before I put him down. Infacol can help. I'm sure you've checke dhtis but too cold? (or hot?) How old is she; could she sleep on her front? Mine sleeps much more happily like this. Does she have dtry skin - could she be itchy? Does she have flatulence a lot, or appear to have tummy ache? I dunno, just some ideas. Imagine if you could find a reason, fix it then have sleep! Worth trying everything I'd say.

I had no sleep last night. Well, DS slept 2.30-4.30 then back to sleep at 6am. That was it. He has a horrid cough and cold and just seemed so awake. I am on this shitty elimination diet and have yet to reap the rewards

strong for everyone xxx

God, sorry I can spell and do have basic grasp of the English language, just never proof read!

Hope your coping alright today imnot and everybody else.

I agree that there must be something causing DD's wakings. I dont think its wind I always make sure she burps plenty before I put her down. I might try a process of elimination and see what works. I will kick myself if it turns out to be something really simple and we've been coping with months of unbroken sleep because of it.

for everyone.

So I've decided that she is waking up so much because she spits out her dummy. So I'm going to start trying the pantley pull off from the NCSS. She actually settled alright without it at bedtime. But still woke up 40 mins later...

Hope everyone's babies are fast asleep.

Broom good luck with whatever the pantley pull off is

DD is faaaaaaaast asleep and has been since 9ish but will no doubt wake in about 10mins. Last night she slept 830 to 130 (hurrah!) and then til 430 and then again til 9ish so brilliant night for her......but typically I couldn't fecking well sleep. I was still WIDE AWAKE at 2am. Grr.

pipoca that's a great night for your LO. Just need to get you to sleep now!
broom....I'm weaning my DS dummy during day time nap before I attempt night time...I'm not brave enough for that yet!
DS seems to be teething again so was restless last night. Slept 8pm til 6:30am but did cry out about 3 times between 11pm & 2am. Just needed dummy & reassurance.
Hope he does better tonight...we seem to have found the terrible twos stage!

This is,poor you,i really feel for you. My DD had a night like you described two nights ago and i was in sleep deprivation hell. Sending lots of your way.

Also know what you're going through pip,we got a good night last night but i couldn't sleep,lay awake for two hours at one point with DD sleeping soundly beside me,drove me round the bend. And then she still woke up at 445 to start the day .

How was everybody else's night?

This is ridiculous! Am hiding behind cot while dd2 blows raspberries, bashes cot, shakes head.......she's not upset but she is clearly nuts. I have been rocking her for 40 mins and I feel sick and dizzy. Give me strength!

Hi, can I join you? DD (5 months) has always been a pretty rubbish sleeper but has been getting steadily worse. She used to do a 3-4 hour stint at the start of the night and once asleep could be put down in her cot. After that she would wake roughly 2 hourly through the night so and I would bring her on with me, she would wake, latch on and we'd both drift back off to sleep. This was manageable especially as I got a decentish stretch at the start of the night.

Then a few weeks ago we lost the long stretch and she started waking two hourly throughout the night. Still, I could put her in her cot to start with and get a couple of hours decent sleep before bringing her in with me (I don't sleep as well with her next to me because she is literally lying on her side against me with my nipple in her mouth).

But the last couple of weeks she won't go down in her cot at all and wakes instantly so now we are co-sleeping the whole night and her waking is every 1-1.5 hours. If I get 2 it's a good stretch . To make thongs worse, she also has a couple of periods around 3 and 5 where she won't feed straight back to sleep but wants to chat loudly or cry for half an hour or so.

I've been coping pretty well until now but we've all got colds which makes everything worse and I'm just soooo tired!

Not particularly looking for any advice (although any tips are always welcome) - more tea and sympathy really!

Sorry, didn't realise quite how long that was gonna be

How did it go thisis? Did your LO settle ok?
Welcome sophie....

The pantley pull off is not working so far. Pip it's where you pull out the dumy once their settled but push the bottom of their chin until they fall asleep. Every time I have tried this so far DD has got very very angry and so I've just given up quite quickly.

thisis DD used to be like that. One evening I'd had enough of trying to rock her do just lay her down and held her hand and she did eventually fall asleep! DD wasn't crying but just generally throwing herself about and squealing. I started just holding her hand every night and now normally it only takes 10 mins ish to settle her. Sorry if you've already tried that.

Got DD to sleep for 6.30 tonight, we've already had 2 wake ups. Sigh.

Ooh welcome sophie

wifey how's it going with no dummy for naps?

scotty eek just thinking about a 4.45 wake up makes me wince.

Oh god, from the sounds of it the neighbours are starting to argue again.

Thisis I read your other thread, you have massive sympathies from me (and admiration that you are still alive and sane enough to post so eloquently!)

Sophiesworld welcome to our hell If you look upthread a bit, you will see a post from me that mirrors yours quite a lot re. DD's behaviour. My DD is nearly 6mo and very similar indeed. If it's any consolation, the last few nights have been much better - still waking loads, but restful, without the shouting. I feel vaguely human once more (although I don't look it ).

Hi,

Sympathy going out to This is and a big hello and sympathy to Sophiesworld. How did life get so crazy?

I'm with you with the nipple in the mouth thing. My 6mo DS falls asleep with my nipple in his mouth in the wee hours when I take him into bed with me. I was going to try the Pantley Pull off but then teething started and I'd have been willing to sell my family for a minute's more sleep, so I've postponed it. No magic words of wisdom for you I'm afraid, just wishing you a slightly saner night and lots of solidarity.

Tell us how you get on in the morning. I swear, for some reason, this thread keeps me sane...

SB

broom....it's gone ok actually...wasn't brave enough to attempt bed time as DS is teething so likes it for comfort.
Can't think who else would understand like you MN ladies do...so I would just like to say : THANK YOU all so very much

Welcome Sophie. Bleurgh I've eaten my body weight in chocolate while watching The Biggest Loser and I feel a bit sick. Off to bed, but not sure I can go to sleep with so much chocolate sloshing around in my belly.

bender - I've had a look back through the posts and your dd sounds just like mine. She's a really light sleeper too and nothing but boob will do once she's awake. Incidentally, we also have carpet clawing cats and are renting our house! We have resorted to nailing a second layer of carpet down outside the bedroom doors or the actual carpet would have been shredded by now . Glad to hear things are improving somewhat for you.

SB - I have had some success with the Pantley pull off, but teething hasn't really kicked in yet so I don't have that to worry about ATM.

MN has taught me not to hold out for solids being the magic solution but yesterday someone told me that both her boys started sleeping through after their first teaspoon of baby rice, and I don't think she was lying maybe just stretching the truth so I am clinging to that little nugget...

Hope u all have decent nights.