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It feels like everyone else's baby sleeps...

78 replies

JollySergeantJackrum · 12/10/2011 16:43

Aargh! DS is 6 months next week. There have been 2 occasions so far that he has slept for more than 7 hours in a row. There have been less than 10 occasions when he has slept for more than 5 hours and these have been mainly after vaccinations.

Does anyone else have a 6 month old that doesn't sleep a long spell at night?

He is still in the room with me in his cot (DP is in the spare room in order to get some sleep). DS is EBF but we have been BLW for a few weeks and he now gets two 'meals' a day, but it's BLW so kind of hard to tell how much he's getting. He doesn't take a bottle.

Last night we put him to bed and he slept for 3 hours 20 minutes. He then woke and I fed him. I put him down in bed awake and he fell asleep. He slept for 3 hours and 20 minutes. Again, I fed him and put him down awake. He slept for 3 hours and 20 minutes. He then woke and I fed him.... Surely hunger can't be this regular?

His last feed of the 'day' starts at 7pm, he goes to sleep at about 7:30-7:45 then his first feed of the night is usually anytime between 10:30pm and midnight, but he once went until 12:30am. If his feed is around 11, he usually wakes between 3am and 4am for another feed. He goes back down very easily after night feeds and sometimes takes lots of milk, but sometimes (especially in recent weeks) is a bit less interested than during the day.

When he wakes at night I usually ignore him to see what happens. He has a toy rabbit and if he's dropped this on the floor I give it back. He often goes back to sleep and I only feed him if either he cries and won't re-settle or if it's been more than 4 hours since his last feed.

I cannot continue to function only getting sleep in 3 hour slots. All the other local baby mums seem to have babies who sleep 11 hours at night and have issues with naps instead. I think I'd swap the naps for good night sleep. Most days he has 3 naps of 30 minutes to 1.5 hours. But how much naps he has does not seem to correspond to how much night sleep he has. Or there's no pattern I can see.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
BenRoo · 13/10/2011 22:16

I was a naff sleeper...
My parents had to drive me up and down the street to get me to sleep Hmm
Thing is, I remember thinking this story was quite cute, how wrong could I of been...
My DH can't recall and his Mum says he was a good sleeper,mind you if you saw my MIL you'd know not to argue with her either. And actually,thinking about it,he fidgets like mad in bed and this our DS definitely gets from him!!

Caz10 · 14/10/2011 04:31

am ffs!!

Must ask my mum, I don't know how I was as a baby actually.

Well am on here because dd deigned to do a...drumroll...3 hour stretch tonight! Woke up, fed her, eagerly anticipated the next lovely three hours...1.5hrs later we are still up....dd is partying...it is almost breakfast time....zzzz

Taranta · 14/10/2011 07:17

Caz10! Oh god DS has been having that same middle of the night party - what fresh hell is this?! I was up from 1-4am last night ffs while he hooted and did a jig in his cot. Objectionable.

dinksdoes · 14/10/2011 07:22

Thank goodness for this thread! Have been up every hour since 1am and feeling so tired unable to function, goodness knows how thoses of you with toddlers are coping. DP left for work slighlty worried as tears streming down my face. Does anyone else question what they are doing in regards to routine/feeding/sleeping? I BF feed on demand and always have to feed/puch in pram dd to sleep in the day for naps . Im regretting doing this now, god I could just lye on the floor and fall to sleep - why wont she????

PessimisticMissPiggy · 14/10/2011 07:22

Poor you Caz10. Thankfully last night was so much better for me and DD. She slept 8 'til 11, feed, 1110 'til 230, 245 'til 630. Feel great. DD is lay dozing on me now. Maybe the grobag helped?

I might actually get to leave the house today and feel safe to drive!

InmaculadaConcepcion · 14/10/2011 08:17

"crying tired" is how one of my Post Natal thread pals describes it. Bang on.

JollySergeantJackrum · 14/10/2011 08:36

I'm almost embarrassed to come back to this thread. Put DS to bed at 7:45pm last night... his motion sensor alarm woke him at 3am as he'd wriggled to the bottom of the cot and it was no longer able to pick up his breathing. He told stories for 15 minutes then slept til 6:30! I, on the other hand, went to bed at 11:30, woke at 3 with the motion sensor then didn't get back to sleep til 5, but I can't have everything.

I can't actually believe it. I haven't done anything differently except vented on here.... The power of mumsnet?

OP posts:
InmaculadaConcepcion · 14/10/2011 08:39

Those 3am fiestas they like to indulge in are worst of all.

At 18 mo, our DD was only waking once in the night - every few nights - but staying awake for up to 2.5 hours up a time. That was what lead to a) night weaning (feeding back to sleep simply wasn't working any more in any case) b) sleep training with CC (thankfully only needed to do it a handful of times and the settling period wasn't too long in each case and ultimately c) full weaning (bedtime feed and all).

The overnight awakenings do still happen, but they're usually resolved within 10 mins, so a massive improvement. The early awakenings (luckily fairly rare) are killers though.

InmaculadaConcepcion · 14/10/2011 08:40

Ha ha, good news JollySergeant!

That maternal insomnia is so annoying, isn't it?! When DD first started to sleep through it took my own sleep patterns weeks to catch up. And even now, I often wake up for a while during the night.

haloflo · 14/10/2011 09:38

I am loving this thread. Sorry to hear others have partying in the early hours. As DD is 6mo a few people have started to mutter CC at me when I mention sleep but I'm reluctant to go down that route.

JSJ I am so pleased that your DS sleep through. Tell us EXACTLY what you did that day so I can recreate the day here!

robino · 14/10/2011 09:48

We were awake every hour last night with the 'oh, hang on a minute - where's the boob gone - waaaaaaa' reaction. Ridiculously, she doesn't often fall asleep completely while feeding, just in the middle of the night.

On the upside the big girls slept all night in their room for the first time in weeks due to bribery incentivisation.

robino · 14/10/2011 09:51

Oh, and good news jollysergeant!

I was a crap sleeper for the first 13 months - woke up every hour on the hour apparently; how I'm still alive I'm not sure! I thought that having 2 crap sleepers close together was payback enough for my childhood sleep crimes and that number 3 would sleep. Apparently not.

RubyrooUK · 14/10/2011 10:26

DS - technically 14 months old but surely at least 9 years old in hours spent awake - woke up a whopping 8 times last night.

He was in our bed and executed the following tricks:

  • Pushed me out of bed onto the floor;
  • Shouted "muuuuuuuuum" repeatedly at high volume when I gently suggested that 45min hanging off the boob at 2am was enough;
  • Sat up and crawled to end of bed, stood up and bounced on bed at 3:30am;
  • Kicked father in face at 4am;
  • Started lengthy conversation with himself about a "good car" and "buuush-bush" (toothbrushing) at 4:30am;
  • Finally fell asleep at 5am clutching my hand, pinning me to one position, afraid to move. I lay there till I got up at 6am for work.

I am now typing this in work toilet where I am wondering how to stay awake during office hours. Just thought I'd cheer up everyone who managed more than 35 min uninterrupted sleep with my lovely nighttime experiences.

For a while, I too thought DS' bad sleeping was totally my bad parenting. But even my mother in law acknowledges he is just terrible at switching off and far harder work than any of her kids (and my mum remembers me not sleeping for 4 years). So now I've decided it's his problem and I'll torture him in his teenage years by making him get up when all he wants to do is sleep all day. Grin

PessimisticMissPiggy · 14/10/2011 17:25

Rubyroo poor you! I'm completely in awe that you managed to get to work after that! I'm dreading returning to work in the new year and hope I'm one of the lucky ones! Has your DS always been like this?

BonnyBanks · 14/10/2011 18:13

OP a very vital thing to learn about motherhood...

Are you listening carefully?

Other Mothers LIE

I used to believe the ladies from my antenatal group who said they were coping with motherhood fine, their babies slept, feeding was no problem and their nappies never leaked and their relationship with their hubbies was just tickety boo. I believed EVERY WORD and felt awful and inept.

Then my DH went to the pub with their DHs. It turned out that far from doing worse than the rest I was actually doing better than some ( and I had two babies to their one)

Women lie to make themselves feel better, it's not about you so ignore it and only worry about your own LO.

Some babies will obviously sleep through the night but loads don't. One real advantage of having twins is that you learn really early on that how children behave is actually very little to do with your parenting style. My wee girl slept through much better and earlier than my wee boy. At nearly 4 the same is still true. He is wakened regularly with bad dreams wheras she rarely wakes in the night.

You have my sympathies though Sleep deprivation is unspeakably awful.

JollySergeantJackrum · 14/10/2011 20:43

Thank you again, everyone. Strangely, I think I've been more tired today than I am normally. Fingers crossed things improve for you all soon and continue on this track for me :)

I feel so much better knowing i'm not the only one though.

OP posts:
Caz10 · 14/10/2011 20:58

Misspiggy I remember being in a blind panic before going back to work after dd1- she was 9mths, and when she was sleeping badly at 2,3,4 months, 9mths seemed far far away in a space age type future where she ate full meals and slept 7-7...then started to realise at 6,7,8 months that nothing was changing! Dreadful. But you do manage, although I know I was nowhere near my best at work, which leads to a whole other set of worries!

Today I am done in. Whoever mentioned crying tired is spot on- I often start the day with a little weep when I wake up feeling much worse than when I went to bed!

RubyrooUK · 14/10/2011 21:31

Yes misspiggy I agree with caz, you do just get through work when it happens. After the first two months, where I felt mental, it all now just feels normal. Tired normal, though obviously......!

BenRoo · 14/10/2011 22:06

I also agree,you do just get through work.
Crying tired is very apt, just add some raw nerves and a dash of delirium and the day flys by Hmm

OP ~ I'm pleased things are working out for you and really hope it stays that way!

fluffywhitekittens · 22/10/2011 09:43

Two nights with three/four/five hour stretches of sleep....
Last night back to every two hours :(
Ah well, at least it's half term so don't have to get up for the school run this week.

LittleWaveyLines · 23/10/2011 07:27

fluffywhitekittens same as you - wakings every 2 hours.... always! Never had 4 or 5 hour stretches..... 16 week DD....

MotherOfHobbit · 23/10/2011 07:34

My DS didn't do the five straight hours (officially 'sleeping through') until 8 mo. He's now 16mo and mostly doing a heavenly 7 to 6.30. I think the first sleep all the way was.around 13mo.

MotherOfHobbit · 23/10/2011 07:38

Er, should probably point out I credit a very sudden turnaround on going cold turkey on nightfeeding.

NoMoreWineForMeThen · 23/10/2011 08:00

I totally agree with the point about Mums telling little porky-pies. At 6 months my DD Was still waking every 3hrs through the night and I would literally be in tears at baby group because I was so exhausted and couldn't see an end to the sleep depravation. In addition she would only be rocked to sleep and refused a bottle of DH was unable to help as much as he would have liked. The other Mums felt terribly sorry for me and were full of advice, telling me all the things they did to get their babies to sleep through.

I just felt so utterly crap and sad.

Well cut to a couple of months down the line and DD had transformed, a combination of techniques and changes in mine and DH's behaviour means that DD is sleeping through like a dream (in fact now at 12 months she sleeps from 6.30pm to 8am virtually every night). Gradually the other Mums started asking me for advice as it turns out their babies didn't sleep through at all, "well Tommy does sleep through sort of but I do have to go and put his dummy in 15 times a night" and "little Jane sorts of sleeps though but I do have to go in and give her a cuddle and rock her 5 times during the night".

I wish they had been a little more honest as it would have really helped me to know I was alone and wasn't the most useless parent in the baby club!

BenRoo · 24/10/2011 03:56

nomotewineformethen
Old or new name?? Wink
Care to share your combination of techniques with us?
Smile

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