6 MO waking every 3 hours

[TheresAHuppoInMyHouse]

My DD is 6 months (4 months adjusted age as she was premature and arrived at 30 weeks). She gradually started sleeping for longer and longer periods and I was feeling very pleased with myself! Then a month ago the night wakings began again, for no apparent reason. She would only have been 3 months (adjusted) so too early for a growth spurt I reckon? Anyway it's still going on and I'm starting to think there must be something I can do to get back to my nice long stretches of sleep!

She is awake for 1.5hr-2hrs at a time during the day, so she normally has 3 naps of an hour each at regular intervals. And a little catnap in the sling sometimes. Perhaps this is too much daytime sleep?

She is exclusively bf and has started to be more distracted suring daytime feeds (those maddeningly endearing pulls-off and smiles! are a killer!) but I'm spending more time feeding, so am trying to keep up the daytime calories.

She is generally happy to settle herself to sleep when drowsy - although always after a bf. For a nap, this only takes a few minutes so perhaps I've started an unhelpful sleep association? Sometimes she's obviously knackered so falls deeply asleep a-boobing, and stays asleep when she's transferred to her cot.

Every time she wakes at night, I feed her and she goes straight back to sleep. I'm a bit nervous of trying to settle her without a feed, and tbh I wouldn't know how to do so. Any tips?

She goes to bed at 7ish and wakes for the day at sometime between 6 and 7. Reading this, I feel like I've got nothing to complain about, but WHY won't the little bugger darling sleep for longer than two or three hours at a time, when she used to do so, apparently effortlessly?!

In the back of my mind I just feel so guilty as I feel that her crap night-time sleep is all down to me being so rubbish with her sleep during the day. She had 5 minutes this morning and about 45 minutes at 2.30pm. I really feel as if her crap sleep in the day is making her sleep rubbish at night....but I really can't stay in and bend around her as I would go mad!

If it is any comfort my DS sleeps pretty well in the day, today 45 mins then 1 1/2 hours after lunch, but he is still crappy at night, so I really wouldn't beat your self up over it. :)

Thanks for the supportive comments on my BF / bottle dilemmas. I know it is the sensible thing to do but giving up BF altogether is just such an emotional thing even though DS is really making the decision himself.

The last couple of nights have been more unsettled again, I think because DS has a bit of a cold and is teething. Although he has woken more there has not been any crying and he has self settled quite a lot which is brilliant news.

I think whether you decide to go down the feed back to sleep or CC route the main thing is choosing the path that feels right for you and your DC. We have to get through this unsettled period in whatever way is least stressful and gives us a sense of positive control. It is all about what feels most comfortable all round, there is no 'easy' or 'wimpish' options

On the day time sleep effecting night time sleep issue I too am constantly stressing about this but I think if I am honest the evidence would suggest it makes no difference for my DS. So try not to worry, easier said than done I know

the main thing is choosing the path that feels right for you and your DC. We have to get through this unsettled period in whatever way is least stressful and gives us a sense of positive control I couldn't agree more! Wise words, ellabella

I'm on Day X (7? 8?) of Core Night Non-Feeding with Dummy Assistance. Last night she woke at 10.30 (bf), then 2, 4.10, 5.50 (bf), 8.20. She is taking only 10 minutes to settle with the dummy on the wakings between feeds, which does feel like progress, even though she is not sleeping for longer stretches at a time. So as long as I can get back to sleep after jumping up to resettle her, I'm actually getting more sleep - it's just only for 2 or 3 hours at a time! To be fair, she wants to get up for the day at the 6am bf but I'm conning her into going back to sleep using the rocker. I know it's cheating but I might as well have a relatively easy life while I can!

And I'm feeling smug as I've been for a run while DP baby-sat while DD had her morning nap. Time for more tea and toast as a reward. [toast] [more toast]

Morning everyone :)

Afternoon

Have to say I am having a pretty horrible day and feel like crying! My friend told me - make sure DD can sleep anywhere. She doesn't sleep in the cot during the day. She also said make sure she can sleep with nosie. Well she can....if the tv is on etc but she really fights sleep when there is loads going on and when we are out load noises wake her up :(
Even now when we get her out of the car she wakes when she used to stay asleep for ages after.

I just feel as if I have sabotaged her night-time (but do appreciate your words of comfort about daytime sleep not really affecting nightime.)

I can't remember the last time she slept for longer than 30 mins in the day :( Have I realled caused this or will her little personality be at play too?

Last night after a 7pm bedtime we have midnight and 4am wakeup. I delayed the 4am feed until 5am and then she went back to sleep until 7am so not bad I suppose.

Greeneone12 - no you haven't caused it! Having had an angel sleeper with DS I am convinced some kids just sleep well and others (DD!) don't. I have really done nothing different with DD and she's a nightmare at days and in the nights.

Some children will sleep well with noise (as will some adults) and some need quiet. I would never consider trying to get either of mine to sleep when there is loads going on - it's way too stimulating - how are they supposed to shut down past the age of about 8 weeks??

Anyway, enough of my pontificating. Since cranial osteopathy, I said we've had no improvement, but in fact looking back on it, one nap a day since has gone for two sleep cycles with a small cry in the middle - this is amazing progress and we are having three wakes at night instead of six so I should be pleased. Last night was:

22:37 (how is it that first waking is imprinted to the minute on my brain?!!) - fed

01:40 (or there abouts) left to mumble then cry a bit and was back asleep by 2am - I really feel as she is going 4 hours in the day, she doesn't need feeding after three hours in the night

03:40ish - fed

06:45 - up for day (which is not too bad frankly)

I am trying to cut out that middle feed at 1/2am and then perhaps we'll work on the 4/5am one when DS is away at grandparents so we can do some CC....Last night when I left her to cry she only cried really for about 7 minutes so not too bad.

We're away from tomorrow at MIL's though so not sure what we do about the night wakings as don't want to keep everyone else awake.

Anyway, hope everyone else's night are progressing!

greeneone poor you, the worst thing I find about no naps is not having any time to sit down/bequiet/do chores/mn/go to the loo etc etc during the day. But I don't think naps are a solutionto night sleeping - dd naps quite well and her nights are still shit challenging.

And your friend must be speaking with the best intentions, but how exactly are we supposed to get these dcs to sleep when there is noise around?! Mine wakes up with loud noise, it drives me mad when we're out and someone sneezes/toots their horn/puts the siren on/laughs too loudly, or whatever, and up she wakes. grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Well we had the best night last night for a long time - she slept from 7 till midnight, had a bf, then woke again at 5.45 for another bf. I coaxed her back to sleep, which took ages, and only lasted for another 40 minutes or so, so got her up for the day at 7.15. Two stretches of 5 hours feels so good!

I am considering tinkering with the core night. Perhaps making it 12-7. Or perhaps trying not to feed before 2am, and then seeing if that makes her sleep a bit longer in the morning. Hmm. Will give it some thought.

Have a lovely weekend, everyone

Thanks ladies. I am just tired upon tired but I know you know what that feels like. Last night I slept in the spare room and the monitor battery died. I still heard DD cry from downstairs (unlike DP who was snoring away).

greenone please don't be so down on yourself. I think some babies can sleep through noise and others don't. There is little point causing yourself more stress by making your LO's naps harder than they need to be, do what works for you and try to ignore the (well meaning) advice!

Don't want to get my hopes up too high here, but for the past 3 nights my DS has only wanted one feed at 11ish, and last night slept 11.45-7.45 with no wake ups. I of course woke up multiple times in a panic, and had to express a little at 6am as I was about to burst! It appears that since he turned 6 months (to the day) he has dropped the 3am feed. I haven't done anything different and I can't explain it but keeping everything crossed it will continue

greeneone ah yes I have a snorey DP too, who stays blissfully asleep when the baby cries! Once I found it so maddening I slammed the bedroom door spitefully to wake him up, as I exited to see to the baby. 'Sorry darling, I can't help it, it's the sleep deprivation you know!'.

I've also developed a spooky baby-sense - the other night DP said he was lying awake while I slept, and I STILL heard the baby start to stir before he did, and was up and off to see to her before he'd even realised she was awake. Perhaps I don't need to be on QUITE such a hair trigger!

baileyslover what great news, fingers crossed this is the start of a new trend!

My DD also had a great night last night - she only woke once, at 1.40, when I fed her and she slept till 7. Oh the joy! I can't help but get excited, but I know it can all too easily go back to waking every 2 hours (which she did the night before last). Please please let it last ....

[fingers crossed]

[toes crossed]

[etc]

How strange...we had a good night too. She didn't wake for a feed until 3am after a last feed at 6pm! Now I am not sure what to do tonight as I am tempted to wait until 3am to feed her even if she wakes. I have started a thread to get opinions! If she doesn't wake until 3am each night I might be able to function again. I nearly drove out of the petrol station with the petrol cap off yesterday :(

Evening all.

Well, after my posts of despair last mon/tues, we have had dramatic progress.

Bedtime had been steadily going downhill (after being the only bit of sleep that I thought we had sorted) and after 2 evenings of long crying sessions we decided that enough was enough. As DS was crying anyway, whether we were there or not, whether we picked him up or put him down, etc etc, we decided we had nothing to lose with CC. Thank you sleepdeprived and ellabella for your v helpful posts on the subject.

The first night took 45 minutes and he passed out mid-cry ..... and stayed asleep until 6.30am the following morning! The following night took 30 mins, and again he slept til he morning. To cut a long story short, we are now 1 week in and tonight is the third night in a row that we have put him down and said goodnight, left the room and he has gone to sleep without a peep. Bless.

We've had a max of 1 waking per night (at which I bf him as I can't guarantee that he is not hungry - I sometimes wake up hungry in the night so I don't see why he shouldn't - and he has either fed to sleep or self settled afterwards within a couple of minutes), sometimes none, and his naps have also hugely improved, it now takes 10-ish mins to get him down whereas previously it could take up to 40.

It was a horrible few days, but my word what a difference. I know that any number of things could send this off course again so I am enjoying it while it lasts (and studiously ignoring any references to the 8 month sleep regression ).

Pleased to hear that some others have had some good nights, long may it continue (are you listening, babies??)

ps greeneone have you tried a snoozeshade for naps in the buggy? doesn't stop noises, obv, but has become indespensible for us in blocking out all of the interesting things that distract DS from sleeping when we are out and about (sky, trees, air, etc).

I need to get my hands on one of those :) I am so glad you have had some progress beela Long may it continue.

Wow - glad to hear of some of the amazing progress being made here. We have tragically gone backwards BIG style. We're away at the moment at MIL's and DD's night waking have gone from ridiculous to totally completely insane. Nearly every 40 mins up to 10pm last night and then every hour afterwards. I'm totally done in.

I'm assuming (hoping?) that this is due to overstimulation and lack of good naps as we were out and about so much seeing loads of different people etc etc.

I can't cope with it for too much longer :( DS is going away in 10 days to my parents so we are going to do CC. Fingers crossed it'll work.....

Could I ask a question re everyone's bed time routine, I do bath, feed then bed. I know you are not supposed to feed to sleep, but my DS is always sleepy by the time it gets to feed time, so whether it is breast or bottle he always gets very dozy. He is sometimes not fast asleep but always drops straight off. Do you guys leave a gap between feed and bed, or am I over analysing things and just enjoy the fewer wakings currently!!

I reckon you are fine. Since my DD was about 3 months I always did bath after last feed to not create a feed to sleep association but now she is 7 months if we are at home I feed her to sleep in the day! I wouldn't worry. Does he self settle sometimes?

On a different note I now find myself with a huge dilema.

Last night DD woke up at 10pm (when she usually feeds) but went back to sleep again! She then woke at 4am and instead of feeding her I put her light show on and she went to sleep again!!! So tonight if/when she wakes at 10pm does last night mean she doesn't need feeding? I have done it for a while and always gone in when she wakes as it's her feed times but if she went without last night then mayber she doesn't need it?!

Really don't know what to do!

Bit late for your dilemma this evening, but I had a similar situation last week. For 4 nights in a row DS did not wake at 3am for a feed, so thought right he clearly doesn't need it, I will now refuse even if he wakes at that time.... Well now at my parents house for a few days and sleeping in same room so guess a bit unsettled. DS woke previous night at 3 am and settled easily, last night was awake for 90 mins as I tried to settle him, then I eventually fed him as I was at my wits end. So now I don't know what to do!! I guess what I will try is settle once, if ineffective then will feed as can't cope with being up for ages - I get so frustrated, then angry with myself for feeling like that, and then I really can't sleep!
Re self settling, as long as he isn't feeling unwell or over tired then he self settles well into his naps, and occasionally early evening. This evening my mum gave him a bottle at bedtime as a treat(for her!) and she put him down awake. He grizzled for a bit but slept within 10mins so guess I am worrying a bit about nothing.

Hmm, I think it only proves that she didn't need feeding at 10pm that particular night! I have spent the past 8 months trying to apply logic to my DS and have realised that it doesn't often work

I'm with balieys, I would try to settle once and if no joy then feed, that's my usual strategy.

Can I join in with you guys? My 7mo is up most of the night at the moment (well it certainly feels like it). He started sleeping through at about 10 weeks old and the occasional time he woke then I would feed him back to sleep. He started waking up again in the night about a month or so ago, I put it down to him outgrowing his moses basket. But he's been in his new cot for about 2 weeks now and just does not settle - he'll maybe go down about 930 when he's actually dropping but will wake about 2. If I feed him he'll go down again but he'll be awake an hour later and an hour after that. Most times I'll just give in and feed him and bring him into bed just to get some sleep but already I'm worried about setting up negative sleep associations.
I've mostly just let him find his own day-to-day rhythm without imposing routines on him but do you think it's time I started? We do try and do a story, quiet time, feed and sleep but I'm mostly feeding him to sleep which is fine until I put him down in his cot and it fails spectacularly and he ends up getting up again.
I'm just feeling a but rubbish 'cos up to now I thought I was doing fine as a mum but now I feel like I'm floundering and I don't know how to approach this. If nothing else, it was good to get it off my chest and now that there are other people in the same boat!

Baileys thats what I was worried about. I feel like we are getting somewhere as now for the last 2 nights she hasn't fed all night. I am just not sure how long you can leave them crying until you 'know' they are hungry. I was once settling for 2 hours and the HV said she was probably hungry but that was me not giving in feeling like she didn't need a feed.

Anyway we shall see how tonight goes. It has been really hot so I am expecting to need to feed her but saying that yesterday was scorching and she didn't need at feed at 10 and self settled instead. Went in at 4am when she was grizzling to find her on her front for the first time!!!

I feel like a crap Mum constantly so don't worry about that. You think you have is sussed and then...bang its all out the window.

Where has theresahuppo gone?

greenone last post from therseahuppo was one with sleeping child, so maybe she has no need for us anymore!!

With regards to how long to continue settling before feeding, I wish I knew! I would say some times when I go into DS in the night he sees me, smiles, then turns his head to the side waiting for me to help him off, and he settles very quickly. Other times he sees me and starts crying harder unless I pick him up. Those times I can eventually get him to sleep, but sometimes only for 10 mins, and I guess these times I really should just feed.

It is just so hard, now I don't have a clue if he will sleep all night or wake up so I just can't sleep properly, and even if he doesn't wake up then I do :(

Ming I don't think any of us have the answer, I know how tiring it is when you feel like you have only just got to sleep when they wake up again. I would say it is always worth trying to settle in the cot, and if that doesn't work then feed. One thing I have learnt is just when you think you know what they will do it changes, so he may surprise you!

Baileys I am so tired this morning because as you righly predicted she skipped her 10pm feed and only need one feed at 3am which is great but I lay there literally all night awake and could not sleep for love nor money. Absolutely gutted!! Just feel like crap today.

We had a better night last night in that DD woke at 11pm and then again at 4am but settled herself until 5.30am and then I fed her just so that she didn't wake DS but I was pretty pleased with that. Her napping has been diabolical today though so we may be in for a nightmare night.

She's started solids but is being so rubbish with eating them that I wasn't sure anything at all was going in, until I saw the nappy this morning - woohoo - success!!

Greenone gutted for you, what a nightmare but well done on DD's sleep, that's great.

After nights like last night I can see that we may eventually get there but then we have another hideous night and I am plunged back into the depths of despair thinking that I may never have a full night's sleep again :(

Well we have definitly dropped the 10pm feed...but she is still waking and grizzling and more often than not self settling. She also woke at 3am but fed. Then 6am and back to sleep for 2 hours so not so bad.

Every day is different though and sometimes she feeds at 5am, sometimes 4. I am really wondering weather enforcing some kind of pattern would help.

DP is a bit of a loser though. Turned off the baby monitor at 3am to try and get to sleep! Lucky he was still awake to tell me when I came back from feeding. Honestly!