6 MO waking every 3 hours

[TheresAHuppoInMyHouse]

My DD is 6 months (4 months adjusted age as she was premature and arrived at 30 weeks). She gradually started sleeping for longer and longer periods and I was feeling very pleased with myself! Then a month ago the night wakings began again, for no apparent reason. She would only have been 3 months (adjusted) so too early for a growth spurt I reckon? Anyway it's still going on and I'm starting to think there must be something I can do to get back to my nice long stretches of sleep!

She is awake for 1.5hr-2hrs at a time during the day, so she normally has 3 naps of an hour each at regular intervals. And a little catnap in the sling sometimes. Perhaps this is too much daytime sleep?

She is exclusively bf and has started to be more distracted suring daytime feeds (those maddeningly endearing pulls-off and smiles! are a killer!) but I'm spending more time feeding, so am trying to keep up the daytime calories.

She is generally happy to settle herself to sleep when drowsy - although always after a bf. For a nap, this only takes a few minutes so perhaps I've started an unhelpful sleep association? Sometimes she's obviously knackered so falls deeply asleep a-boobing, and stays asleep when she's transferred to her cot.

Every time she wakes at night, I feed her and she goes straight back to sleep. I'm a bit nervous of trying to settle her without a feed, and tbh I wouldn't know how to do so. Any tips?

She goes to bed at 7ish and wakes for the day at sometime between 6 and 7. Reading this, I feel like I've got nothing to complain about, but WHY won't the little bugger darling sleep for longer than two or three hours at a time, when she used to do so, apparently effortlessly?!

Night's are even worse here (didn't think it was possible emoticon) DS woke every hour last night until about 11.30pm, then i was battling for nearly 2 hours to get him to go back to sleep. He was just crawling around the cot and then the bed. I have to admit i did lose the plot a bit and ended up shouting at him to just go to sleep (obviously it didn't work).

I bought the winnie the pooh lightshow out of desperation, it doesn't work. He wont keep still long enough to notice the projection or he just hits it and trys to pull himself up on it.

I honestly don't know what to do. I'm just about coping at the moment, but I go back to work soon and due to finances and our childcare situation I'm going to have to work evenings. If his sleep is no better i don't know how i'm going to manage dealing with him all day, going to work and then doing the night shift as well.

I tried to stop bf'ing the other day, at the moment Ds refuses a bottle and i think that mix feeding probably wont work as he's such a stubborn monkey. need DP to be able to take charge a bit more (at the moment if DS wakes at night he wont resettle for DP) Anyway, he went 10 hours without any milk; solids and water though, and he still refused to have a bottle or a sippy cup of milk. So i gave in, was too scared that he'd try and make up for it in the night, not that i'd notice any difference in his wakings to be honest.

I think i'll speak to my HV today, but i expect her to just tell me to let him cry, but previous experiences show that it doesn't work. If i thought it would work i'd give CC a go in a heartbeat, that's how bad its got.

Hope you're all having better nights, it sounds like some progress has been made for some people

Slept 7.30-11. Fed. Then slept 11.30-4.30. Resettled till 5.30. Resettled till 6.10. Gave in and got her up for the day. All smiles and giggles. Dammit!

Now she is blissfully snoring her way through her morning nap. The morning naps tend to be 2 hours when she's had a crap night, which I can understand, but how can I get her to just stick her mammoth morning nap onto the end of her nighttime sleep? Gah.

I was vile to poor DP this morning. You would have thought I'd be more in control of my mood by now - had long enough to get used to it!

Must be positive. Sleeping for 3.5 hours and then for 5 hours is MUCH better than when I started this thread. Welcome to the week, everyone!

Hey!

grumpybum the light show seems to be working (but she still puts up a fight!) Last 2 nights she has woken at 3am and after switching on the gadget it seems to have lulled her back to sleep for a few hours. The last few nights have been down at 7pm, up at 10pm for a feed, up at 3am for a whinge, up at 5.30am for a feed, in with us and then back to sleep until 8am.

Those extra two hours in the morning are literally saving me going crazy!

She is on two meals a day now so maybe when we add in the third she might start going through. Maybe she won't.

Funny how she has started to add in that 10pm feed as one time she was going 7pm-4am. Oh those were the days!!

I really won't know what to do with all my energy when she starts sleeping through, if....!!!!!! Luckily she is all smiles and mumumumumumumum's in the day which is lovely. Horror the other day when she only had one nap for the whole day and my friends LO's are having two, one of which lasts 2 hours. Oh how lovely it would be to have that time in the morning....

x

Swaddling working an absolute treat for bedtimes - she's going down without a peep which is such a relief, but has made sod all difference to the night wakings. Had a shocker last night and had the "sleeping through 3-month old" in the next room and felt I couldn't risk waking her up so just stuck a dummy in which is something we stopped over 6 weeks ago. What a nightmare!

Oh well, will continue with the swaddling. Just dread the nights :(

Hope other people's nights continue to improve.

I don't know what these babes are up to! It all seems so random.

Last night DS went to bed at 7pm, woke at 8.30pm and I got him back to sleep 4 or 5 times (proper sleep, eyes shut, deep breathing, the works) but as soon as I left the room he woke up and cried. Gah. Even feeding him didn't work as he woke after that too. Eventually he went back to sleep at 9.45pm. Can't even remember what happened after that, all the nights are blending into one now.

Nights are like a magical mystery tour at the moment, I never know what to expect and when I go to bed myself I don't know if I'll be asleep for 30 minutes or 5 hours before being summoned to do my parental duties. Still, who would want a clockwork baby? (ummm.....)

Hello Everyone

Have been keeping a low profile as did not want to jinx any progress with boasting posting on here!

After reading a few sleep books I decided on a firm plan: only offering 1 feed at around 4am, no picking up, cuddles or feeding at any other wakings (unless I felt he was in pain) and doing CC if shushing did not settle him.

We had 10 nights of alternating between sleeping through until 4am ish and then the next night having multiple wakings and having to do CC. It seems to be working though as we are having more nights sleeping through til 4ish, he has not woken before midnight for at least 4 nights now and is often self settling if he does wake earlier in the night. Day time naps are also better again. It feels like a bit of hard guidance is slowly getting him back on track.

It could all change again at any moment though I know. I no longer take good sleeping for granted after the last couple of months. I am just waiting for the next 'thing' to unsettle his sleep - rolling over more, starting to crawl, a growth spurt, return of constipation, more teething, the list is endless

Sending all chronically sleep deprived mummies loads of and sympathy xx

Oh help. DS has been in bed since 7pm. It is now 9.45 and he has so far woken up 4 times. We have calpol-ed and DP is trying to settle him.

This could be a very long night, wish me luck ladies....

Well a slightly better night last night. Down at 7 without feeding to sleep, many renditions of "twinkle twinkle little star" and a few tears with me in the room but after about 10-15 mins he went off after some tummy rubbing as well.

woke at 10 but settled easily, woke at 11 and tried to resettle without feeding but he was having none of it. He did keep dozing off but would then wake himself up again as soon as i put him down. Handed over to DP, but he ended up being fully awake and so i gave up and fed him. Ds then woke at 3, fed, 5 resettled, 6 fed and 6.45 up for the day.

Was trying to go cold turkey with feeds as i dont think he really needs them, he's huge and eats loads during the day but never much at breakfast as he's so full of milk.

HV as anticipated suggested CC which in the cold light of day sounded ok, but then as the evening draws in i lose the bottle and dp isn't very convinced by the idea

hope you all had better nights

Well last night turned into a battle of epic proportions, which not even feeding or calpol would solve. Terrible terrible terrible

Following my post at 9.50pm, DS finally conked out at 11.45pm , there was a feed somewhere in the middle of that (10pm?) which did not do the trick although it calmed him down for a while. He was ok in mine or DP's arms, but the second we put him in the cot he wailed. Couldn't find anything physically wrong with him.

I have never really liked the idea of CC, but following a very long evening of uncontrolled crying I figure if he is going to be doing it anyway we might as well give it a go, IYSWIM.

I just need to work out how to do it! I understand the principle of leaving longer gaps between going in, but what do you do when you go in? Do you just stay for a bit then leave? How long do you stay for? Do you get baby out of the cot or not? I think I will have to do some research before embarking wholeheartedly on this mission cos I am so scared of getting it wrong and causing abandonment issues or something.

I feel like I've got the hangover from hell today, knackered with a headache, and not even a good night out to show for it. Am very grumpy!! DS on the other hand, is full of smiles, blowing raspberries and giggling. Gah!!!

Hope everyone else had a better night than us.

beela that sounds like a shocker, hope you manage to get some rest during nap time.
We seem to have stabilised on bed at 7.30, feed at 11ish and 3ish, then wake up at 8am with a 5am settling needed 50% of the time. Not too horrendous really, but I pine for those 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep!

What I am currently struggling with is leaky nappies overnight. Because he feeds 3 times it no longer holds all the wee, but if I change his nappy at one of the feeds then he is wide awake and a nightmare to settle. Not sure what is best really.

Reading all of this with interest as my six-month-old hasn't gotten worse, exactly, he's just never been that good. At the moment he's in bed at 8 (often cries a bit afterwards but we only get him up again if he's really upset), then up at 1, 3, and 5ish. He'll occasionally settle with a cuddle, usually a feed and sometimes only a feed and then falling asleep in my arms (lovely but not a long term solution)

Sometimes I just end up in bed with him leaving DH in the other room. Usually feed him if he's really crying... I know the neighbours can hear us which means cc is not an easy option to bring in.

Am going to try a dreamfeed tonight at around 10pm to see if that keeps him asleep for longer.

Good luck everyone else...

Hi all,

beela, your night sounds exactly like mine...Waking up every hour, very unsettled. My husband is away for work, so I let my 6 year old sleep with me- in the morning, bleary eyed I told him: 'did you hear the baby in the night?' He said 'only when you put him down for his sleep'!! He didn't hear a thing all night!!!

Anyway, I did CC and it did help a bit, we had a couple of nights of sleeping through. I am also confident that he is not hungry or unable to self-soothe, as I have seen him do it, both at bedtime now and sometimes in the night. I saw the HV just now and we concluded that it must be tummy and teething, so will stock up on teething powders, give some Calpol or Nurofen and also give him cuddles. It is just so confusing, isn't it? I found CC difficult, but I coped by not leaving him to cry for more that a few minutes at a time, started with 1 min and went up to 5 the longest I think.

I don't know, I think maybe treat it as a phase (lasting a good month now!! grrr...) and somehow find the mental strength to continue in the knowledge that it is not always up to me to fix it...

Hello sleepy mothers

DD was back to 2 hourly wakings (and some 1.5 hourly) last night although she only got fed at 9.30pm and 6.40am (when she got up for the day). However as it was taking longer and longer to resettle her, I'm not sure how much real sleep she got after about 3ish. I was so sure she would sleep, because she had eaten loads of sweet potato for her tea, I was relying on its soporific properties! And true to form, now her morning nap is going on and on ...

baileyslover I share the nappy dilemma! I normally change it and risk the wide awake baby, because I don't want the dreaded nappy rash to add to the mix of reasons she will wake ...

This has been going on for nearly two months now, I am VERY bored of it and VERY tired and frustrated. I know in the long term it is only temporary, but it really doesn't feel temporary enough!

Beela this is what my HV said about CC yesterday.

You do bedtime routine, trying to avoid letting them feed to sleep then pop them in their cot awake and say something like "night night baby Beela, I'll see you in the morning" they key being that you say it very calmly. Then leave the room

She said leave it 10 mins before going in the first time they cry, but personally i think i'd only do 5.; but she said it has to be 5 mins (or however long) of proper crying, if they cry for a few mins, then grumble or stop crying you have to restart the timing from when they start crying again IYSWIM.

When you go in you very calmly restate the bedtime phrase, not in a symapthetic kind of way but more matter of fact to show that you're in control of the situation (accroding to HV babies are reassured if they can sense mummy is in control of things) She also said that if DS was hysterical we could pick him up, but not to cuddle or rock, literally just until he calmed down. (I was a bit suprised by this as i thought CC meant not touching them, but she seemed to think as long as picking them up wasn't how they went to sleep it was ok)

she them said extend the time by about 4 minutes every time, and repeat as necessary until asleep, she said it could take some time but DS would eventually fall asleep from sheer exhaustion (not sure i like that bit). You have to repeat the process for all night wakings, and she advised to drop night feeds all together as its a bit confusing for babies to understand sometimes they get fed and sometimes they dont.

she reckoned 3 nights is how long it usually takes, and although she didn't mention it and i forgot to ask i guess you'd have to use the same method for naps?

HTH

For those thinking about doing CC, just as an example of how you coud do it, this is what we have been doing:

When DS wakes in night I go in quite quickly, so he doesn't wake up too much, and try and re-settle him by hand on his chest and shushing. If this does not seem to be getting him back to sleep and he starts to escalate to proper crying then start CC (as long as I feel he is not in pain with tummy or teething)

I do 5, 10, 15 minutes then start at 5 again.

Each time I go in I put my hand on his chest and shush for a couple of minutes before leaving again.

My main 'rules' are not to pick him up and not to feed him.

Sometimes it has taken as long as 3 hours for him to go back to sleep It IS really tough and tears my heart out but for me I know that in the long run it is kinder all round for him to get better sleep and to have a mummy that is more tolerant and happy during the day if she has had more sleep.

We have had to do it every other night for 10 nights in total before it seemed to have any effect, so be warned it may not give a miracle cure in the '3 nights' often quoted. BUT I would say it has helped him re-learn self settling and sleeping much better at night and for day time naps too.

Hello All

beela magical mystery tour is right! It's so hard when you don't know how long your first stretch of sleep will be! I won't say much about our night but things seem to have settled down for now.

Wish we all lived closer so we could meet for a great big fest!

x

ellabella you have done SO well to persevere with that, it must be really hard. Well done and I'm glad you're seeing some progress.

greeneone great news that you've been having a better time, hope you feel more refreshed as a result.

My core night mission continues .... last night she fed at midnight and 5.40am and I encouraged her back to sleep (thank god) till 7.30. She needed settling at 4 and 4.30. Tbh I don't think she's getting the message that she doesn't need to wake between 12 and 6 but I will persevere!

I have noticed that the number of cups of tea I need in the morning has increased dramatically! I am basically glugging tea like mad, could be setting myself up for caffeine addiction but it is an absolute necessity!

Well last night was a bit of a disaster, especially as had a headache even before it all kicked off :(

DS woke at 10 and wouldn't settle so fed, then awake every 45 mins until 2 when fed again with 2 hours of unplanned cosleeping as I fell asleep . He then woke at 5 and wouldn't sleep until yet another feed, then slept until 9!! Ho hum

I know he doesn't need all those feeds over night, but he thinks he does! I would love to stop them but can't face the crying. Normally he is quite easy to settle in his cot between feeds, but as soon as he has decided he is hungry he is inconsolable. Theresa how do you manage to avoid feeding for so long?

I knew I should have kept quiet Yesterday I actually felt rested for the first time in months and now I feel back to knackered again

Last night he woke at 1.30, 3 and then finally 5.45 for a half hearted BF. The good news is there was no crying, he was just awake and seeming to enjoy my company. Each time I tried settling him and then left him awake and he went back to sleep quietly I didn't sleep much though as was too worried about him waking a friend that was staying the night.

Having a a real miserable day today, refusing to nap in cot again and really whingy and crying. I think he is a bit coldy and looks like two teeth are on the verge of breaking through.

Greenone wouldn't it be lovely if we all lived closer and could meet up. I am in Gloucestershire, where are you?

How are others getting on with topping up BF with bottles for DC's too distracted to feed properly during the day? I am coming close to giving up on expressing all the time as it is just one more thing that I could do without at the moment. For my own sanity I am thinking it will be FF all together soon. Saying it makes me feel really sad and a failure, which I know is silly But if he just won't BF enough to stop getting hungry what can I do . . .

Hi baileyslover - re settling without feeding - I am lucky because DD is still small enough to be in a rocking cradle rather than a proper cot. (It's a Silver Cross pram on rockers). So when she wakes between 12 and 6, I dash into her room, shove the dummy in and kneel by the pram, rocking it until she's gone back to sleep. Sometimes it takes half an hour, sometimes only 5 minutes. I'm determined to do as much of this 'training' as I can before she finally grows out of the rocking cot, which has been a godsend! (It won't be long, I'm bidding on ebay for a proper cot as we speak). The dummy has made a massive difference, though. It really helps her drop off again without a feed. I hope hope hope that it keeps being so effective, but experience tells me that it won't last for ever!

If there was crying then I think I would cave in and feed much more quickly.

At the baby group I went to today, a few of the other mothers with 4-6 month old babies were bemoaning the fact their DCs used to sleep through and are now waking a few times a night. It seems that this is really quite common. The question is, how can we survive it, and is there really anything we can do to try and improve things, or will the babies just do it in their own sweet time?

ellabella don't feel bad about not wanting to express any more. You've been an absolute hero to keep going for so long. I gave DD 90mls of formula this evening before bed, which is the most I've ever given her, to try and get her to sleep for longer. And in August she'll be going to nursery when I go back to work, so she'll have to get used to formula during the day then as well. I intend to keep giving a bf in the morning and before bed, but hope that I can smoothly transition to ff the rest of the time, over the course of July, if not before.

You are not at all a failure! But I know it feels a bit sad, I feel the same tbh. But I will feel much much better if I can sleep for a few hours at a time! And while the babies keep growing and developing, so our approach to caring for them must change and develop too.

Hope you have a good night tonight, everyone xx

Hello tired peeps. Hope everyone's night wasn't too bad. We've had a horrid night (before last) and then last night was OK - man alive it's amazing how your standards drop. My OK night mean DD slept until 11.30pm - longest she's gone for ages, woke at 2.30 - I left her chatting for half an hour, went in at 3am reswaddled and she went back to sleep instantly until 5.30 when I went in - she was still swaddled so I fed her and she slept again until 7am.

Rather typically, DS woke at 0540 for the day - arrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

In 3 weeks time DS is going to stay with my parents for 4 nights and we are going to do hard core CC. Not looking forward to it at all.

Oh yes, and in the "grasping at straws" territory, I took her for cranial osteopathy on Tuesday. No difference noted.......

Thanks ladies for the CC advice. I never thought it would come to this and am a bit , especially as I was explaining it to my mother and she looked a bit doubtful. However, we have done 2 nights so far and it is going ok I think (but don't want to jinx it!). But it does tear your heart out, doesn't it?

ellabella we are still having formula top ups when necessary. The other day I was sure DS was hungry - not sure why, can't remember now - but he refused to latch on, I tried both sides in 3 different chairs and two different rooms(!) and he just got cross. So I got a bottle of formula and he guzzled 9oz!
Don't feel bad, you definitely haven't failed, you have fed your DS for 6 (7?) months! The way I look at it, I am doing what is best for him at the moment. For the first 6 months that was bf. Now he is older and wants to look around and wriggle, bottles work better.... and expressing all of those would mean sitting on a chair attached to a pump whilst he played on his own. It does feel a bit sad though.

Tonight's challenge is going out to a dinner which starts at 7pm. My mum is babysitting, so has to put DS to bed for the first time ever, on the third night of CC. How did that happen?!

Morning all

Well 8pm, 9pm, 11pm, 3am and 5am!!!!

ellabella its a crazy world as you feel guilty wanting to do top ups...I would LOVE to do top ups but can't due to bottle refuser. DO IT! Iam in London so a few miles between us sadly.

Theresahuppo I really think maybe that HV was actually speaking sense. I mean surely even the most level headed people must come to a point where frankly they have just had enough of the guessing game:

wet nappy
dirty nappy
too hot
too cold
teeth
hunger
affection
night-terror

and the list goes on!!

It really is one step forward two steps back. It was hot yesterday and I am sure DD has hayfever and was really congested. I am also not convinced that she is getting enough in the day and we are still on 2 meals. I think, come 9 months if she is still waking then I will investigate harsher action but until then I think I am going to wimp out and feed unless she really was only fed an hour ago. I am a wimp aren't I?

greeneone12 I don't think you are a wimp, but then I am leaning towards that route so at least we will be wimps together!
Last night was a mixed bag, woke at 9, 11.30 for feed then at 2 - tried settling, took 20mins of screaming before asleep then wide awake 10mins later so gave in and fed ....then he slept for over 5 hours and I had to wake him up at 8!! The first 5 hour block for months.

Not holding out much hope for this to continue, this pm he is knawing everything and his cheeks are very red so poss teething session arrived.

I just keep telling myself it will pass, but with my DH being away for 5 weeks from Sunday I kinda hoped that it would have got a bit better by now.