MN's 10th Birthday Party competition - write a Haiku about MN and win a golden ticket. To be judged by the Poet Laureate. (Not kidding!)

[JustineMumsnet]

So... it's our tenth birthday and we're having a party to celebrate on March 2nd. And seeing as we can't possibly fit you all in, we thought it would be nice to have a competition to have 10 Mumsnetters (plus partners) come along. As part of the prize we'll put you up in a London hotel, dress you in Boden (natch) and send you out to dinner at Pizza Express too. Full details here.

All you've got to do is to write a haiku (and we know how good you are at those) which sums up Mumsnet. And the 10 best will win. Simples.

And lest you think we might not pick the right winners, we've got Carol-Ann Duffy, Poet Laureate, to judge them for us. So for all those of you who enjoy writing in verse, here's your chance to shine.

Good luck.

To wean
or not to wean
that is the question
amongst others

mumsnet addict here
lurk for hours,housework not done,
but laugh,learn,live,love

Do I know any
of these women in Real Life?
Do they live next door?

applestrudel

v gd

DH thinks mumsnet
will divide us in fact it
keeps us together

I am a better
mother thanks to mumnset but
more of a slattern

Assistance in need -
People I don't know are friends.
Together we're more.

online once again
housework undone, kids undressed
mumsnet keeps me sane

1010 2010
What do we make of them then?
Pirouettes and spin?

You read the Grauny
I read the Financial Times
Interestingly wrong!

That cream is hopeless
That blue is lovely on you
Leggings! With fangles?

my guilty pleasure
words on a computer screen
wine covered keyboard

At the toddler group
I find Mums chat so boring
Yet I log on. Why?

Carrie and Justine
Gave mothers a place to vent
an unreas'n'ble spleen

grin, wink, angry, sad
a maelstrom of emotions
who mentioned Gina?

A child care guru
Nearly bought down the best thing
to happen to mums.

Women are clever
Mums are even cleverer
Mumsnet is the proof

rolling multihead
ed planet yet unconquered
by the uniform

(Can I do as many as i want?)

precoital plucking
prepares possibly pointless
first time frolicking

murky chavposh pool
open biting unseen mouths
awaiting morsel

Garden fence or laptop,
housewives' choice or biscuit choice;
how they love to sneer.

Words that I can't say
to my mother or my love,
written to strangers.

I will never meet you
But tell me your darkest day,
All your dearest hope.

All we have to share
is the cry in the night, and
the small needy hands.

Sorry to do this again, but since we are allowed multiple goes, can I just make a small revision to an earlier entry:

Threads of silky speech.
We are spiders. We are flies
In our safety net.

Used to read The Mail.
Misogynistic? It is.
Thanks for the heads up.

Imaginry friends
Become more real with each spring
As friendships deepen.

Imaginary friends
Become more real with each spring
As friendships deepen.

I can spell, honestly.
Weeps about being outside the uk - not often I'm prompted to say that.