Try the new 'support' reaction

[LizzyMumsnet]

Many of you told us that while you enjoy using the ‘Thank’, ‘Agree’, and ‘Love’ reactions, there are times when you want to show empathy or care, especially when someone’s going through something difficult, without it feeling like you’re “loving” their situation.Starting today, you’ll see a new reaction available on the site called ‘Support’, represented by a flower icon.Here’s how it works:

• Select the ‘React’ button underneath the OP or reply.
• Choose the ‘Support’ reaction (or any of the others) to show how you feel about the post.
• Reactions are private and only visible to the post owner.
• You can select one reaction per post.

The full range of reactions is currently available on the website only (not in the app). We hope this gives you another meaningful way to connect with others and show care when it’s most needed.

Let us know what you think or if you have any questions! We're actively looking in to the issues being reported regarding ads and pages freezing so please bear with us on that!

You can still use the laugh emoji in reply to a post. 😀You just can't laugh secretly at people

Please bring back the laugh emoji and just make them public to stop people abusing them.

Worrying about it becoming a 'popularity contest', is really overthinking it IMO.

We're all adults here. We should be able to publicly thank/support/love/laugh etc, using a little emoji just as we do with words.

And if a 'popularity contest' using emojis is such a grave concern, how is that any different to when a poster is quoted over and over on a thread, with people adding "I agree", "This" and "First poster nails it"?

There's no difference at all so I don't see the big deal.

We're all adults here. We should be able to publicly thank/support/love/laugh etc, using a little emoji

You can do that publicly!
You can't do it privately because it was used for private bullying.

Obviously, it's just more of a faff to have to do it.

It's horrible to use it to laugh at people in distressing situations, obviously, but those people just need to be reported and banned.

And those who want to be nasty can easily do so on the thread, if they're that way inclined.

I think this is where a lot of us get confused around the logic. Private bullying is not ok but public bullying is apparently acceptable because everyone else can see you doing it?

Personally, I'd rather deal with a few private laughing emojis than a massive and potentially humiliating public pile-on.

Obviously. But the Talk guidelines say that personal attacks aren't allowed, so you are left with having to criticise the racist content, which I'd argue is more productive.
I'm not saying either is a fantastic experience - I was responding your question asking how to challenge racism if you can't label a person.

Eg saying "you're a liar" vs "it's untrue to say xyz, and this is why".

Exactly.

You can't use the reactions publicly, you can only post your own emojis because as you said, it was used for private bullying.

Therefore I'd like to see the reactions made public.

The worry about a 'popularity contest' is a ridiculous one for the reasons given in my post.

I understand that this is what we are supposed to do, but not everyone will necessarily know the rules. And it's incredibly frustrating to see a poster who has called out racist content in slightly the "wrong" way getting deleted while the racist content is left to stand.

People usually report bullying posts they see. That's how MN identifies the posts to remove, and they usually go pretty fast -sometimes before OP sees them.

All this is explained on the threads about the removal of the reaction.

I've been here nearly 15 years and my personal bugbear is people/companies using MN for free advertising.

For all those years I'd immediately report spammers the minute their posts appear.

Now it's too much of a faff to scroll up to the meatball menu, scroll to the report button, scroll the reason for report, hit report and return to the thread or the topic.

I don't think you've done yourself any favours there, especially at night when spammers seem to be around the most.

I guess I'm baffled that you can't call a racist a racist. It makes no sense

I am baffled about why we can't do that but have to skirt around what everyone can see: a racist doing a racism

I used to use it for showing my appreciation for someone's humour not to secretly laugh at them. Yes you can make a new post to show 😂but it was less bother just to click on the old laughing emoji.

I agree with you. They should be made public. If we’re all “grown ups” then we can handle the popularity contest surely?

Posters who start provoking threads or flood a thread with provoking posts are usually well versed in careful wording. Reporting them often doesn't work because they are just shy of the guidelines.

That these posters are usually new or name changers is a seperate issue. You can't call them out on that either beause that is classed as trollhunting.

I think the emoji choices are really pointless and they all mean like/agree/support as far as I'm concerned.

You can report it and challenge the content. Please do!

'Play the ball, not the man' is always a good tactic for productive debate.

Also if they're a racist troll then attacking the person directly is exactly the engagement they want. They then derail the thread. I've been on online forums for 30 years and "don't feed the troll" is still A+ advice. Talk past them or comment on the general argument they've made, and report it. They hate it if they don't get a response. (Not saying that all racists are deliberately trolling but I bet many are).

🙄

Yes, it's been 'handled' since the day MN began and people would quote others and then agree/laugh whatever.

A public button is no different.

In fact it would be handy to stop the thread being clogged up with people quoting and then posting a laughing smiley, or 'agreed' etc.

You know people who want to be cunts will just misuse the support button, right?
Like on reddit with the care shit.

To paraphrase the jurassic Park guy, twats will find a way. Oh poor you with your first world problem have a hug.

Its going to end in tears.

I am now channelling my mother

I just want a good old as a reaction most of the time tbh.

.

Tbf, if it's a stupid problem then a jokey "support" won't be traumatic compared with a real problem with a HA-HA! reaction.

I see racists using the laughter reaction on Facebook quite often. Dead refugees etc. I think it's that specific type of behaviour that was migrating onto MN.

We can’t all be as expert as you at dealing with this stuff

Lots of bullying posts are left to stand because they are deliberately written in such a way as to ensure that they don't get deleted.

MNHQ say that they consider intent, but the evidence doesn't always support that.