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what on earht are you all doing wih tis suiceide stuff

833 replies

FluffyMummy123 · 30/05/2008 16:01

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
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foxinsocks · 30/05/2008 17:26

well sectioning could be your saviour objectivity

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expatinscotland · 30/05/2008 17:26

voice, yes, but referred on.

at least until MN finds out where they stand legally IF there is an instance in which an OP does in fact harm themselves.

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Slubberdegullion · 30/05/2008 17:28

pointy (not sure if we are agreeing or not)

I think someone with an acute life threatening physical problem is absolutely on the same playing field as someone with an acute life threatening psychiatric problem.

As I said I think in my first post there are different levels of suicide risk, I just don't think that mn posters on the whole are able to assess that accurately.

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foxinsocks · 30/05/2008 17:29

I would like MNHQ to comment actually.

I'd like to know if they are going to do anything about this.

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expatinscotland · 30/05/2008 17:30

it's a problem that needs to be dealt with by professionals particularly because suicidal tendancies tend to go hand in hand with substance misuse and abuse.

i know from my own depressive experience that during the worst of times i was actively abusing alcohol and tended to find people who were in similar states with regards to drugs or alcohol or both.

i know when i first saw my GP here - a saavy nurse called him in - his training in mental health was far more valuable to my condition than any website, because of course one of the first things he asked me about was my substance usage.

it's a complex problem and online you don't know if an OP like that is also drunk and/or high.

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expatinscotland · 30/05/2008 17:32

x post, exactly, Slubber!

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EustaciaVye · 30/05/2008 17:35

I have watched some of these recent threads. I'm not sure they are good for my own mental well being so will be trying to avoid them from now on. It is a bit hard when they appear in Chat though.

If MN were to do anything about this then there should be a 'response framework' with guidance on how to respond to the thread, what advice to give, where to direct the person to.

I can see that some people have been helped out of despair by some of these recent threads but I think that speculation on who it may or not be, and some posters demanding asking for updates make it all a bit car crashy.

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pointydog · 30/05/2008 17:36

I agree that serious physical health problems are on a par with serious mental health problems. But because punters like to think they can save a life with kind words, or because they feel morally obliged to at least try, you end up with these huge long threads rather than a swift 'get proper medical advice'.

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notjustmom · 30/05/2008 17:38

This reply has been deleted

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zippitippitoes · 30/05/2008 17:41

i think the best place if you are suicidal is not mn but a hospital preferably if possible as a voluntary pateint

if you are severely depressed a real life support who can advocate for you unti;l you get help is the best thing

if you havent got that and you feel at risk then either go to the gp and tell him/her that you want to stay with them because you are scared they will eventually get you to see an on call psychiatirst

or if not a gp A&E similarly you have to say you are scared andf wont leave there side until you get help, ime a gp is better for this

ypou can also ask your gp for numbers to ring if you are desperate

i think there have been more of these kind of threads but maybe it reflects the higher numbers of posters

tho nautarally if there are posts then people will feel that they have permission to post

mn did solicit links for mental health about three years ago but never instituted them presumably for legal reasons

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ProfessorGrammaticus · 30/05/2008 17:43

I'd like MNHQ to comment too.

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Thinkstoomuch · 30/05/2008 17:45

You lot should get over yourselves. 'It's not our job', 'It makes me uncomfortable', etc. Have to say it reads like a lot of the regular MN 'big names' don't seem to like a bunch of depressives ruining their fun with all their dull talk of topping themselves.

Every day there are mums posting about their depression and struggles to parent. Where exactly are you drawing the line - ok to give them advice but not if they veer towards suicide?

If you don't like it and don't want to help just ignore those threads.

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BoysAreLikeDogs · 30/05/2008 17:48
Hmm
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pointydog · 30/05/2008 17:49

We're not drawing a line anywhere. We're talking about it because we want to. Get over yourself.

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vermilion · 30/05/2008 17:50

THinkstoomuch, quite simply we are not trained, we have NO IDEA what is the right thing to say, little real idea of people's circumstances - what do you suggest we do, just fudge it and hope for the best?
I think Cod is trying to clarify this a bit, because for sure there are enough people who are happy to post and post again, who can have no real idea if they are helping or not.
I struggle with parenting and depression and get advice here but my life is not at stake if the thread doesn't go the way I wanted.

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DumbledoresGirl · 30/05/2008 17:50

The argument that this is a parenting site is ludicrous. By that reckoning, we cannot talk about chicken keeping, films, tv or geeky stuff.

And I am still not sure what any of you mean when you imply that suicidal threads cannot be allowed to exist here. What do you propose? Literally deleting the thread?

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pointydog · 30/05/2008 17:54

At least put them on mental healtjh

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madamez · 30/05/2008 17:56

I would be very wary of any attempt to shut down these threads, upsetting as they are for some people. It may not be the appropriate place, but if the suicidal/unhappy/attention-seeking/whatever person feels it's the only place to go, then is it really right to cut off that possible support? What I would venture to suggest is that people not directly involved (ie if you have no idea who the suicidal one is) might want to back off rather than upset themselves, in the same way as, if you see a car crash but someone is doing the first aid bit already, you walk on by because you aren't needed.
Because for one thing, saying 'suicide-ey threads shouldn't be allowed' might deter posters who are not actually tying the noose but are feeling like shit and want to wail and rant and dump out all their feelings. I suppose the bottom line is: we have to take responsibility for our own wellbeing if we have issues around something, and stay off threads that are going to distress us, where we can;t help the person involved.

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StellaWasADiver · 30/05/2008 17:56

This reply has been deleted

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vermilion · 30/05/2008 17:56

It's not ludicrous. I am not in over my head if I post about chickens.
The choice is to post or not post, but say you do, you run the risk of making things worse.
Deleting threads immediately though is not the answer I don't think, not a good way to go.

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pointydog · 30/05/2008 17:58

I don't think that is the general thinking at all, stekla

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DumbledoresGirl · 30/05/2008 17:59

Some people, regretably, aren;t over their head when they talk about suicide either. So if you are over your head, ignore the thread.

When I said ludicrous I meant chicken keeping has sod all to do with parenting.

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WilfSell · 30/05/2008 18:02

zippi, the problem is though that people in that state have no insight into what they should actually do to get help, or even that they need to. I guess people who try to talk to them here believe they can work through their denial somehow to encourage them to recognise they need help.

I'm not sure about a swift 'get help' thread either. If someone finds this a good place to talk, why not? It's as good as an untrained close friend. But the problem is the purpose the thread has beyond helping the protagonist. it begins to have a life of its own and serve the needs of other posters.

I'd be happy with a professional who could intervene appropriately, tell others to back off, while - as MNHQ seem to have done this week - with appropriate 'backroom' action to identify and contact the poster. Something like the role Tiktok plays on BF/FF?

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tiredemma · 30/05/2008 18:03

I dont think that is the general thinking stella- that is not how I have interpretted it anyway.

If you really are at the point of suicide, you should ideally be in hospital/place of safety.

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StellaWasADiver · 30/05/2008 18:05

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