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Original poster

Does mumsnet actually want to alienate core users? (Sex topic in active)

94 replies

Ceryneianhind · 23/02/2023 23:33

Seriously?

I haven't seen a single post in favour of having the sex topic in active, and load against it, so why won't you take it back out?

OP posts:
ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:05

These threads are getting tedious, there are more threads in active about people not wanting the sex topic than threads from the actual sex topic. You are all just drawing attention to it rather than just hiding it.

eurochick · 24/02/2023 08:08

My guess is that as part of the deal with the sex toy supplier they agreed to have sex threads in Active and are now stuck with it unless they amend the contract.

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:13

I'm turning ad blockers on until MN at least responds to this. It's completely changed the culture of the site. If they're doing it for the £££ we the product can go on strike.

It's either that or dereg but then I won't see what happens!

RedDoughnut · 24/02/2023 08:16

It's seedy, fine on its own ( alert from the Sex Chat thread) but not in Active. I dot want people looking over my shoulder and thinking I'm a pervert or creep.

And MumsnetHQ are not reading the room.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:22

There are currently 4 threads in active about the sex board being in active and currently zero threads in active from the sex board.

Yes I think they should be removed from active but why can posters not just hide them?

HornyBee · 24/02/2023 08:30

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:05

These threads are getting tedious, there are more threads in active about people not wanting the sex topic than threads from the actual sex topic. You are all just drawing attention to it rather than just hiding it.

Agree

Megifer · 24/02/2023 08:32

I couldn't believe a thread i saw yesterday, it reminded me of the early days of AOL Online chat rooms with desperate spotty teens repeating their age and sex asking to chat sexy times etc.

In a ghoulish way I couldn't stop reading (and laughing). Why on earth are people using mumsnet to arrange shags when there's so many sites like Tinder? I feel a bit uncomfortable with one theory I have and hope I'm being really daft.

namechangeforthisbleep · 24/02/2023 08:35

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:13

I'm turning ad blockers on until MN at least responds to this. It's completely changed the culture of the site. If they're doing it for the £££ we the product can go on strike.

It's either that or dereg but then I won't see what happens!

Lol

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:39

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:22

There are currently 4 threads in active about the sex board being in active and currently zero threads in active from the sex board.

Yes I think they should be removed from active but why can posters not just hide them?

It's because the pervs from the sex topic are posting on all the other threads with their incel perspective. Where you could previously guarantee a poster would be told to LTB she is now being told to try putting heels on and making an effort with her hubby.

romdowa · 24/02/2023 08:41

Can we ban these moaning posts instead? They are taking over the active posts, where I've only seen one sex forum thread in active. It's getting ridiculous now, if you don't like how the site is ran then leave , while clutching your pearls.

Megifer · 24/02/2023 08:44

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:39

It's because the pervs from the sex topic are posting on all the other threads with their incel perspective. Where you could previously guarantee a poster would be told to LTB she is now being told to try putting heels on and making an effort with her hubby.

Show quote history

I've noticed this.

Plus, back on the "im a horny and looking for a bored mum" thread - how does this square with what MN always warn people about? I.e. be aware people aren't who they seem etc?

Brefugee · 24/02/2023 08:44

having finally managed to put it in my "hidden topics" - quelle surprise that i still see it.
sigh

CrotchetyCrocheting · 24/02/2023 08:45

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:22

There are currently 4 threads in active about the sex board being in active and currently zero threads in active from the sex board.

Yes I think they should be removed from active but why can posters not just hide them?

Are you happy to be part of a site where people post details about having sex with underage girls who cannot consent? If everyone that objects to the sex board 'just hides it' that's what happens. Until posters that object to the sex board being in active raised this as an issue sex board users were happily contributing to a thread containing this.

Is that really what mumsnet has come to? Posters should just hide posts from men detailing having sex with underage girls and let them get on with it?

Batcountry8 · 24/02/2023 08:47

I've seen a few of the sex thread titles and it's getting annoying.

Yeah read the room Mumsnet.

JustWantedToSayThis · 24/02/2023 08:49

This reply has been withdrawn

Message withdrawn as it quotes a deleted post.

milkyaqua · 24/02/2023 08:49

midgemadgemodge · 24/02/2023 08:02

You do know you can hide the board don't you ?

You do know you can't hide a board on the app, don't you?

Dubbydoodoubter · 24/02/2023 08:51

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:39

It's because the pervs from the sex topic are posting on all the other threads with their incel perspective. Where you could previously guarantee a poster would be told to LTB she is now being told to try putting heels on and making an effort with her hubby.

Show quote history

I agree with this.

I remember a prolific poster who kept going on about how he was doing poverty stricken women a favour by paying them to give him a blow job.

In general, there are more man-centering replies than I remember previously.

Logicoutofthewindow · 24/02/2023 08:51

I didn't even know there was a sex board. I must visit the wrong time of the day since I've never seen a sex topic thread yet.

Lobelia123 · 24/02/2023 08:53

I hate it too.

So if one of the mysterious Mumsnet police / behind the scenes workers sees this, please take note...you are alienating so many regular users.

Everyotherone · 24/02/2023 08:54

FlamingoSocks · 24/02/2023 00:03

MNHQ, you don’t seem to have realised how confronting, loaded and unpleasant it is for most women to be unexpectedly faced with sexual comments and discussion.

We are not prudes, most of us here I expect enjoy sex and masturbation - on our own terms and at our own chosen time and with adults we select. The vast majority of women though will have a visceral reaction when unexpectedly and unwantedly we see or experience sexual behaviours. For most of our evolutionary history, unknown men displaying sudden, unexpected sexual behaviours means we need to be alert to the prospect of rape. Even now, going about your business and suddenly being exposed to something sexual - being flashed/groped/leered at, dealing with sexual comments - will be a degrading, frightening experience.

I know that words on the screen is not the same and I am not at all blaming the users of the Sex topic. But scrolling down Active, looking at thread titles and suddenly seeing a message about a sexy massage, rimming, anal sex etc etc has the SAME EFFECT on women as a man sidling up to them and hissing j there ear. It’s horrible. It’s discomfiting and it’s very dislocating to your sense of safety.

There does not exist a time or a world where a woman scrolling through a parenting site is going to
welcome suddenly reading about sex. She may seek it out at certain times of her choosing but essentially women are hardwired to be wary, disgusted, and scared when unexpectedly and unwantedly exposed to sexual content. You won’t change that because you want to flog a vibrator and you absolutely need to sort it out.

@FlamingoSocks I wish there was a like button for posts like yours. Exactly what I’d like to be able to say.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:57

Are you happy to be part of a site where people post details about having sex with underage girls who cannot consent?

I haven't seen any sort of thread like that and I'm pretty sure if there was it would be pulled immediately

CrotchetyCrocheting · 24/02/2023 08:58

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:57

Are you happy to be part of a site where people post details about having sex with underage girls who cannot consent?

I haven't seen any sort of thread like that and I'm pretty sure if there was it would be pulled immediately

It wasn't.

Megifer · 24/02/2023 09:03

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:57

Are you happy to be part of a site where people post details about having sex with underage girls who cannot consent?

I haven't seen any sort of thread like that and I'm pretty sure if there was it would be pulled immediately

I saw that grotty little thread this morning, its still there.

SalviaOfficinalis · 24/02/2023 09:06

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/02/2023 08:05

These threads are getting tedious, there are more threads in active about people not wanting the sex topic than threads from the actual sex topic. You are all just drawing attention to it rather than just hiding it.

I think that’s the point (certainly what I’m going for) - spam the whole site with hide the sex topic until MNHQ actually act on what everyone is telling them, instead of trotting out the same “we’re listening, honest”.

Bamboux · 24/02/2023 09:09

Mardyface · 24/02/2023 08:13

I'm turning ad blockers on until MN at least responds to this. It's completely changed the culture of the site. If they're doing it for the £££ we the product can go on strike.

It's either that or dereg but then I won't see what happens!

Ad blockers unfortunately won't block either those threads, or the 'promoted by mumsnet' threads advertising sex toys to women who've just given birth.

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