Boarding board?

[Xiaoxiong]

Hi MN - would you consider a separate Boarding board similar to the step parenting board?

Regarding: www.mumsnet.com/talk/education/4627099-first-time-boarding-missing-ds-so-so-much

This is not the first thread I have seen where an OP wants support or advice relating to boarding, and it's derailed by unsupportive or actively insulting comments from MNers who disagree with boarding as a whole, or making comments like "oh how the other half live" etc. Which is fine, everyone is entitled to their views and to post wherever they like - but it's not useful to the OP at all, who obviously has her reasons for being a parent of a boarder.

@Bekind2yourself @queenrollo @Festoonlights @dworky @catsarecrackers and other posters are fighting the good fight on there but the poor OP isn't getting much support.

If we had a board where parents could post relating to boarding without having to run the gauntlet of people who disagree with boarding, it would be incredibly helpful to people like poor old @muppetsmum who is getting rather savaged at a very raw time for her

That isn't a reason not to offer a potentially safer place to ask for boarding advice.

bursaries crop up on private school threads in the Secondary topic more regularly than they would on a boarding thread.

Bursaries and boarding are totally unrelated topics so I don't see that this reservation is relevant. There are bursaries available to day schools too. So yes, you could say that a separate board for independent education doesn't help raise awareness of bursaries to those in the state sector, but that's not what we're lobbying for. You could argue that a board dedicated to bursaries might be the most effective way of raising awareness of them but that's a whole other issue!

I think a Private school board would be a god send. The way any discussion of them kicks off into class war within ten posts drives me nuts.

We made our choice already! We aren't going to switch because of a random person on the internet being judgy.

I'll calm down now.

Sorry - in my haste I should have mentioned that it could cover private - day and boarding

That would be fine if it were just about choosing the schools, but as soon as you have a private school board MN runs the risk of all the secondary education threads getting split in half and we stop learning from each other. When choosing GCSE options, or wondering about homework etc it isn't relevant what type of school the child goes to. A boarding school board would sty small and niche and the users would be 'forced' to go to the main education boards for general education issues.

Personally I don't generally see the 'class wars' you describe, they certainly aren't nearly as derailing as those that happen on the boarding school threads.

Also many private day parents also wouldn't dream of boarding...

Yes please, please can we have this @DawnMumsnet ?
I've seen so many examples of this basically, verbal bullying of boarding parents over the years. It's completely unacceptable.
I couldn't believe the treatment of @muppetsmum in particular. We're talking about a teenager, who's been totally involved in the decision process - actually driving it - and a mum who's put her son's wishes before her own feelings. Hardly the same at packing a 7 yr old off for a 2 months like in the old days, but reading the responses you'd think that was exactly what she had done. I thought it was disgraceful.

Hope you're feeling better @muppetsmum and looking forward to the weekend. Fwiw, I had a brilliant time at boarding school (for the most part), although i selfishly never gave my mum's feelings much thought. I should have done!

Also agree it's not a private / state thing. Or it shouldn't be, though I suspect that does drive some of the vitriol. We have two state boarding schools pretty close to us and I've see state boarding parents post on the education boards lots of times.

Brill idea op

please let us know when sorted mumsnet as otherwise I’ll forget and my son boarding next September so very keen to join!

Not a good start re how will board will go on the basis of this very thread 😞

@Doingprettywellthanks I wouldn't judge on this as it's in site stuff and who really looks there without reason?
@DawnMumsnet could we have an update please?

Yes very keen on a Boarding board - please @DawnMumsnet !

Hey all - am just bumping this for MNHQ with whom I've been chatting! I reported a particularly unpleasant/hysterical comment about former boarders from another (predictably derailed) thread and reminded MNHQ that we've been waiting for a response to this.

I have no skin in this game (would never consider boarding for DC, didn’t board myself) but I agree that a separate board would be good. Boarding school threads about practical issues or comparing schools currently can’t happen, as they always get derailed by debates about the morality of boarding. That seems unfair to me, as someone who’s had a lot of valuable information about schools from threads on the secondary education board.

That’s a good idea actually, that it should only be about comparing, choosing, applying, and the details of real life, contemporary boarding. So any appearance of that other stuff could be instantly reported and deleted.

Reiterating my request for this too - we've put a state boarding option first on our Secondary School form but I'm in desperate need of somewhere to ask questions about the practicalities, red flags, considerations that I might not have thought of (no boarding background in the family).

@HighRopes they also get derailed by the morality of private schools, even though not every boarding school is fee paying (as illustrated by @MKDmumofflash 's comment above).

It's deeply frustrating because while boarding isn't right for everyone, neither are day schools right for everyone and yet you get the same few posters over and over derailing threads.

@MKDmumofflash feel free to PM me any questions and I'll try to help, though I don't know as much about the state sector. Or start a thread and link it here and we can be assiduous about reporting any derailing comments.

Thank you @Xiaoxiong for your support here and in the PMs.

Here's my thread 🙂 www.mumsnet.com/talk/secondary/4668101-ripon-grammar-any-recent-experience?utm_source=thread&utm_medium=share

Apologies for the completely incompetent link!

Trying again

Hello @Xiaoxiong and everyone who contributed to the thread. We're happy to direct you towards your new Boarding board.

Please use it - we periodically review the boards and may mothball any that are tumbleweedy.

Thanks all.

Hooray! Thanks so much MNHQ! We can stop hassling you now! And if we lose it because we don't use it that's fair enough.

@YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet thank you for listening and giving boarding parents, existing and prospective, a safe space for advice without constant derailing! I think it's incumbent on those of us on this thread to direct people there so it stays a useful resource as well.