Can we have clarification on venemous name calling in postings?

[milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo]

This is a dreadful thread and has got serioulsy out of hand: www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=7&threadid=328165&stamp=070523185244

And there have been others recently, I love MN but don't like the level of bitchiness and name calling that has occurred recently

Was this the one about booking a hotel; room for an afternoon?

yes that's the one

Thats just nasty beyond belief - I have asked for advice on personal issues before and will do again - hope I won't be hounded on - was this person having an affair?

suposedly

Yes they were. Still no excuse for name calling though.

Was she just naieve in asking for advice or gloating and hoping to raise a few heckles

Hard to say. Some thought it was malicious but the charitable interpretation would be tactless. Whatever her motives I still feel members were unreasonably abusive. But I'm quite new to MN and didn't know it was the 'nest of vipers' as mentioned below. Still hoping it's not really.

I agre with milfa we should have open forum even where issues are uncomfortable (and the thread she was talking about was guaranteed to strike a chord) wihout getting personal. I did feel very uncomfortable looking at the thread - I know its emotive topic (and possibly the op should have known it would provoke strong reactons) but it did get quite vicious.

Some of the threads on here are very sensitive (one whre someone was bemoaning fact they were having a boy about a day after I'd delivered my son at 21 weeks really struck home) but I don't think people should stop writing them - I just ignore them as its down to me to not read stuff that is too painful rather than try and judge others.

I agree, I'm sure we've all got weak spots we don't want to see discussions about and it's not hard to avoid them. Weird thing yesterday was I found the personal attacks much more upsetting than the original posting.

No excuse but predictable I think. A bit stupid too.

Bullying and name calling are just deplorable - however sensitive the subject.

By nest of vipers do you mean older mnetters?

I think its better to put your point accross without personal attacks. I can understand how some people get very angry about certain issues but there are ways of dealing with it without name-calling. Its not very dignified although I am guilty of it myself in RL when absolutely fuming. But usually in RL we doin't have time to sit and reflect on our response, whereas on MN we have that choice and can sit on our hands for 5 minutes until we cool down. LOL

I'm sure someone earlier on this thread said along the lines of 'come on everyone knows MN is a nest of vipers' but now can't find it. Could have been a joke. Maybe it's been deleted. Don't want to inflame things again.

Found it: Carmenere yesterday said: 'Look FGS MN is well known to be a nest of vipers, if you don't like it, leave. Easy.'

No - I don't want to get lynched myself so will not mention any possible n of v again...

Hmmm. Now I'm worried about your older mumsnetter query, I'm probably old in years but new to MN. Anyway we all seem to agree name calling's not on so I feel satisfied. Have a gd day.

Amen, Carmenere Wed 23-May-07 19:49:34

A while back someone on one of the other parenting sites referred to MN as a 'nest of vipers' so the reference comes up from time to time

Speaking as a medium-term MNer (over a year so not quite an oldie!) I would say that you do have to be fairly tough to get on here, but also there are limits. MN Towers keep the rules fairly simple in terms of what can and can't be posted (no personal attacks) which means that from time to time things will be perceived as unfair (eg personal attacks deleted which people feel are justified, or unkind comments not deleted because they're not attacky enough!) but it has the merit of being clear and relatively hands-off.

The abuse lately has been both old and new people as far as I can see, and posts by both old and new people have been deleted.

I was referring to abusive language Edam, in respose to your 'she asked for it' post.