Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Site stuff

Join our Innovation Panel to try new features early and help make Mumsnet better.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Why is there a separate section for special needs in Education?

165 replies

depankrispaneven · 01/01/2014 16:07

Wouldn't it just be simpler to include something referring people to the more active SN section further down the page? And indeed to put that section immediately underneath the Education section?

OP posts:
lougle · 05/01/2014 21:31

I've only just seen this (not feeling at all well):

"Ok yous all win, I'm defeated. I just thought if people felt like me, try to see it from that pov but no it completely went against me, as for bringing up old posts where people aren't here to defend themselves that's wrong too."

Devient, I had to do that. Ok, I didn't have to. I chose to do that because you posted your recollection of events, which were completely false, then when you were called on it simply said 'I've got too much going on in my own life to remember the ins and outs of other people's arguments.'

If you didn't want to remember accurately, then you shouldn't have brought it up. That said, if you're going to remember inaccurately, and post that your recollection is that we on the MNSN board told other posters that their children were too old for them to post on our board, when the facts are the complete reverse, then it's only fair that the truth can be stated.

If I had said 'this is how I remember it', then people would be left thinking that everyone thinks the best of themselves in hindsight. So I posted those threads which very clearly show that we were imploring posters to stay and get support, but they were telling us we weren't able to support them because we didn't have experience.

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 21:42

Ok in response to that I am only going off people's inboxes, I have been asked to post this link in response to yours which I felt no it's not my fight, I'm coming over wrong and it's me getting the backwash, however I will post it as it also shows how people thought I wasn't bullied but at the time it felt as though I did. Anyway again it's perceptions and feelings etc stuff that can be mislead in a post and if you aren't that good at explaining, well your screwed, don't post, I get it now.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_campaigns/1672938-New-MN-campaign-around-children-with-special-needs

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 21:46

The trouble with the sn system, depending on experience etc and I know it has made me cynical, once I have that someone is against me it sticks, I am a born worrier and yes this is only mu pov but maybe others are like that too.

lougle · 05/01/2014 21:54

"Ok in response to that I am only going off people's inboxes, I have been asked to post this link in response to yours which I felt no it's not my fight, I'm coming over wrong and it's me getting the backwash, however I will post it as it also shows how people thought I wasn't bullied but at the time it felt as though I did."

So you are posting on behalf of posters who aren't brave enough to post themselves? Who are willing to talk through the medium of devientenigma? Who are willing to slag us off through you? And you think that's right?

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 22:02

Like I said earlier I learnt my lesson, you knew before now I was. Maybe the word isn't because they are not brave but not as foolish as me for trying. No one is slagging you off, like I said its perceptions and how people are feeling, there has been a lot of hurt gone on and I think we can see who has been hurt the most by those who have left. An individual is nothing if they feel and see differently. Yes I thought it was right to help, obviously I'm not that good at it but then I'm useless at everything. Plus it doesn't matter what I do or say its wrong and tbh I don't care how crap you make me look.

hazeyjane · 05/01/2014 22:15

I don't think I can read this anymore. You are saying you are the mouthpiece of people who are unwilling to come onto the thread themselves, to say how badly they have been treated by....who? All of MNSN? I don't think I understand it anymore, but one thing is clear it is not helping anyone to keep raking up these supposed hurts.

I am out of this thread, and won't be getting involved in any more that start going the same way.

lougle · 05/01/2014 22:19

I read that thread earlier. I have just re-read it to make sure I haven't missed anything. I'm not sure what point your friends in your inbox were making?

For clarity, I only posted twice, once with a suggestion, then a quick follow up saying 'stupid me, I didn't read the thread...'

I have just read every single post. I can't see a single one where there was bullying behaviour. I can't judge the posts which were deleted, of course, but there seem to be equal deleted posts between yourself and another poster, so it seems tit for tat.

Re. the namechanging poster, come on. It was a bit daft to change names by one digit and one piece of clothing then expect people to realise you want to be incognito! If you want to be incognito, change your name significantly.

Your first post on that thread was to say 'I don't think you should be doing a campaign because even if you do, no one will grasp what our life is like and we'll still be outsiders'. You went on to tell the other SN posters that they couldn't possibly have a life like you do.

I am sure, beyond doubt, that your life with your DS is extremely challenging. I am sure, beyond doubt, that it must hurt all the more because you had the triple test and were deemed low risk for DS, then went on to have a DS with DS that is at the extreme end of severity. I am sure beyond doubt that you feel isolated and that you are against the world.

That doesn't give you the right to tell everyone else that they don't have it hard, or that they can't struggle, and you can't claim that it's misinterpretation by other people when you actually type the words in a post.

No one bullied you on that thread. People bent over backwards to discuss it with you. They expressed concern for you. They asked you time and time again what would support you.

If your friends have issues with MNSN, perhaps they should be bold enough to address them themselves? I can't see why you have to front it for them.

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 22:22

And like I said I am no more, there was only a few not all of mn, think of clothing. Then there was a few from page 2. However it doesn't matter how people feel if they don't fit, feel uncomfortable etc it's tough for them as there's never a happy agreement. And yeah I will be slated for saying that, maybe I'm using the wrong words, maybe I'm being picked up wrong. Either way where is the compromise when people feel hurt and there is no proof, how do they feel they can post again?

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 22:26

lougle the nc poster is not who you think it is! I am not incognito with them, lightpassenger would clarify that as she has just told me who it is. But then yet again I won't be believed, you'll come up with something else which I also can't defend, I defo think your voluntary skills are wasted as you would be paid good money as lawyer or barrister.

lougle · 05/01/2014 22:27

They have to decide if the support they get is worth moving on from the hurt they feel? Just like I did when I took a break and then, after some time, came back? It's how adults deal with life. Nobody will force people to post. I have never seen someone excluded on here. Never. Yes, people disagree. Yes, it can be hard to see a way forward if every suggestion you make is met with negativity and rejection. But the same old posters keep trying, again and again.

lougle · 05/01/2014 22:28

I was referring to that thread, not any other, regarding nc posters.

Please don't use your suggestion of me retraining to be a lawyer or a barrister as a thinly veiled insult.

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 22:29

Hang on why me? Life is still crap but the updates I posted were positive. I have not helped or asked for advice in case I say or do anything wrong. I have protected myself from that. I try to help a few others, it's going wrong, I back down.

devientenigma · 05/01/2014 22:31

Oh god I'm lost now, I thought you meant the 2 nc on here. Anyway if you knew me you would know that it's not an insult.

lougle · 05/01/2014 22:34

No, I meant on that thread.

My post of 22:27 was in response to your question:
" Either way where is the compromise when people feel hurt and there is no proof, how do they feel they can post again?"

I was referring to the people who you vaguely reference who feel hurt and have no proof.

lougle · 05/01/2014 22:35

Anyway, I'm done. I had a migraine earlier, I took my 2nd to last maxalt to combat it. I've only got one left and I'm not wasting it.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page