Share your top tips for grans and you could win a copy of the new Gransnet book

[CariGransnet]

To celebrate the publication of the Gransnet book (which is full of great advice for grans new and old and (obviously) the perfect Christmas gift for mums/MiLs) we'd love to know what your top tips for grans would be. Let us know before 5pm on Weds 27 Nov - our two favourites will win a copy of the book.

when and where can I get this book?!

top tip-sneaky sweets taste better:)

The link takes you to Amazon, killpeppa, so I guess it's already on sale!

sorry!
I tend not to click on links-too many bad experiences-my ebay page is scary.

I think we can safely assume that MNHQ wouldn't add a dodgy link - although you're wise to be cautious!

If you hover your cursor over a link, you should get a display of the full URL for the link somewhere on your device so you can see what it is before you choose to open it.

haha didnt think!
everytime I see blue writing I picture Terry Wogan

I'm new to this grandma lark so the only advice I can give ( and this is the advice I've given myself) is to only offer opinion or advice when it is asked for.

You asked!

Or Cliff Richard

Downton - that is VERY wise (and indeed in the book - I think many gransnetters have learned the hard way)

And yes - book on sale and it's a genuine link so click away

Accept that your dd/ ds will raise their children differently to you.
This is not a slight against you!

If advice you give is not taken, it is not a slight against you and does not make your child a 'brat who doesn't listen to anyone.'*

*Bitter experience.

I think subtext just became text...

Treat your grandchildren equally. That is my top tip.

I just mentioned this on another thread-
when your dgds are old enough to menstruate put a lined lidded bin next to the toilet, DON'T think it's good enough to put an open bin in the bedroom across the landing
hth

Remember the Grandmother's prayer; grant me the energy to step in when I'm needed, the discipline to keep my face out when I'm not, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Don't tell your dd about how your own mother came round every day to help, then be too busy shopping with your friends to do the same.

Yes, we all find out the hard way that motherhood is tough. Don't remind your sobbing, stressed, sleep-deprived dd of this unless you have plenty of tissues to hand and can handle what you call a guilt trip and she calls an outpouring of pent up frustration

Accept that you followed current advice based on all the available information, and your dc are doing the same. If approached calmly, the differences make a fascinating discussion :)

GPs it is your job to teach children to tie their shoelaces imo. also to teach them card games. it is the law. even i will do it when i'm a grandma.

i adored my grandad. sitting at his table playing cards for pennies is still one of my fondest memories.

Numptynamechange My grandmother taught me how to get money out of a money box without opening. see, those are the types of life skills a grandchild needs.

Accept that the guidelines regarding weaning/sleeping ect for babies change and don't take it as an insult when your DS/DD/DIL follow the 'new' guidelines instead of doing what you did.

Just sit back and enjoy! Spoil the little dears, sneak little treats, subvert the parents, & give many cuddles. That what I want my mum & parents in law to do for my boys.

Remember that just as you did, every parent has tge right to make their own decisions for their child no matter how ridiculous and pfb you know tgat decision to be.

If you lucky enough to enjoy a retirement, the odd offer of taking the washing is always very much appreciated!! If you can handle it, sleepovers for the dc even more so!

Some of the parenting guidance you were given has now been proved to be very dangerous, not just outdated. Eating liver while pregnant, putting newborns to sleep, on their tummy, in a separate room etc. Probably a good idea therefore to read up a bit about current guidelines before recommending them to your children. They might just listen to you and unwittingly put your grandchildren in danger.

Oh and a child in nappies is 100x easier than a child struggling to potty train when they're not quite ready. We have disposable nappies now, so we don't want to make our lives miserable by getting our DCs 'on the pot' at 12 months old!

Don't say, 'Oh, you did that all the time, this is payback', when your DD wails about the child not sleeping/being stubborn/having tantrums.

'I remember you doing that, and it drove me mad but we got through it and so will you', says the same thing in a more supportive and positive way.

In fact, use this as an example for EVERY comment you make to your DD or your DIL. No matter what advice you are giving, try and turn the sentence around so that it is positive and encouraging. She is already sleep-deprived and overwhelmed with the responsibilities of parenting. Be nice.

And if you can't be nice, say nothing.

ADHD is not caused by a lack of boundaries, poor parenting, or an unwillingness to smack.

Remember that times have changed ~ as sad as that is.