What do you wish you had known before you had your DC? Tell us for your chance to win a copy of Why Did Nobody Tell Me?: Home Truths Every Parent Needs to Know.

[RebeccaMumsnet]

Hello. This week we published Why Did Nobody Tell Me?: Home Truths Every Parent Needs to Know, which is the paperback version of The Mumsnet Rules.

And we wanted to mark its publication and nudge you towards a bookstore with a small but perfectly formed competition-ette.

For those who don't already know, Why Did Nobody Tell Me? is full of common sense and good cheer to steady you during the trickier patches of child-wrangling - told from the perspective of those who've been there, worn the (puree-splattered) T-shirt, and more or less emerged in a fit enough state to boggle at the PFB madnesses of their early parenting days.

So, what we're asking you wise folks now, in a competition-y way, is to tell us what you wish you'd known before you had children.

Please post your "in hindsight" confessions/admissions/witticisms here. We'll pick out ten winners from all who post - and send each of them a spanking new copy of Why Did Nobody Tell Me?

Good luck!

7am is a lovely lie in.
It is perfectly possible to eat a full roast dinner and pudding with one hand.
There is nothing that a baby wipe won't clean.
Babies don't like toys, they like pulling hair (especially dp's chest hair), gurgling, tv remote controls and labels on clothing.
A baby wil put anything in it's mouth, be aware of this when changing nappies.
Don't be smug if you have a good sleeper early on, it could all change after a few months
You will get more sleep if you accept that the baby wants to be in your bed for a few months - and early morning baby snuggles are lovely.
There is no problem in the world that doesn't seem better after a gummy smile from your dc :)

That babies don't read parenting guides, and that time spent reading too many of them is better spent sleeping or just muddling through.

To chuck away any baby books and just follow your individual baby and your instincts.

That sometimes, even health care professionals are wrong and your instincts are right.

In particular there are lots of gps out there who know nothing about breastfeeding. They don't get trained about Breastfeeding and any additional training is voluntary so not all gps know that much about it and any advice they do give is based on personal opinions/experience.

In short, if you need advice on bfing, speak to LLL, Breastfeeding drop in, lactation consultants or national Breastfeeding helpline.

They really aren't babies for long and this screaming/colicky/sickly/non sleeping stage will eventually pass.

That toddlers are incredibly, frustratingly infuriating sometimes but they can also be hilarious

When you feel yourself losing your patience with your kids, pause and try to remember what it was like to be their age.

No one is a perfect parent, everyone loses
It at several points along the way. We are all just muddling through and everyone has a different opinion on how you should be doing it. Just nod and smile and carry on doing things your own way.

That the best inventions for a newborn are things called baby nightgowns /baby bundlers - so you don't have to spend half an hour trying to do up a babygro in the middle of the night when you are totally exhausted.

That it really could take some time before you get that real wave of love. I felt almost as if I were going though the motions with DD until somewhere after 6 months when the wave just very slowly started to creep up on me. It possibly started around the time she started to sleep .

That no matter what you are going through with your baby, there is a website called mumsnet where someone will be talking about the same thing

Oh and...when it comes to putting newborns to sleep on their back, I was told it was 'very unlikely' a baby sleeping on its back would choke on its own vomit. DD managed it twice in the first week.

Both times I was awake and dealt with it fast, and of course I'd never put her to sleep anywhere except on her back, (she hates tummy time anyway, she'd never sleep on her front) but it was terrifying to experience. So I'd tell people to watch out for it.

Loving this thread - making me smile & tear up at the same time

That even if you've just done a wee, bouncing on a trampoline will make you wee yourself just a little (& I do lots of pelvic floor exercises)

That if you persevere with the baby groups, you will eventually find people you enjoy spending time with and will make friends for life with whom you can share the horrors and joys of it all.

Oh and you will be shocked and terrified to find that you appear to be pushing your baby out through your bottom..

Good point Sweet - I didn't realise I was in labour & just thought I needed a poo!

I have learned so much but two things that really stick out for me:

Read all the baby books you like. The baby hasn't read them so the book won't always have the solution to your problem. Far better to talk to other parents in RL or on message boards as you'll always discover someone else who has been there and got the t shirt and that in itself helps more than you'll know.

Secondly I wish I'd known to consider that my children could have special needs and/or disabilities. It simply didn't occur to me that it could happen to my children and it did. It could happen to any child and may not be diagnosed antenatally. Now I see so many who don't even consider the possibility but it's not something that you can just come out and say to people is it?

That I would grow old waiting for DH to stand up for me, and I could and should have told the ILs to leave us alone.

That some babies do not sleep and it is ok to hold them and ignore everyone who tells you they must be in a cot

That some babies cry, for no reason at all, and it is not your fault.

That potty training too early is a waste of time and a way to guarantee tears all round.

I laughed til I got tears at 'Has that man been to B and Q?' then teared up again at having children being like pieces of your heart walking around

I didn't expect it but I have ceased to be a drama queen about things since becoming a mother - I am rarely if ever upset about anything involving me.

Toddlers move at two speeds: breakneck - when they want something (usually associated with chocolate) and snailspace - whenever you are in a hurry.

If you accept this with a modicum of good grace it will save you saying 'oh for gods sake HURRY UP' twenty seven times a day.

Also, you need to buy a battery recharger - a big one. Because you are going to go through a shedload of batteries. You will not believe how many the average child's toybox includes.

Your sex life will change. For a bit it will be worse. If your relationship survives that bit it will get better. And sometimes you will be grateful for lack of sex because you are just grateful to get into bed and sleep.

That even if in the newborn phase you pray that they start sleeping through and you're a lucky one and they suddenly start doing that, you still wont sleep as you will be up every 10 minutes checking them to make sure they're still breathing.

That they bite before they can understand what "no" means but after they have teeth.

That when you shouted at everybody who tried to take pictures of you with newborn (because you were knackered and looked like a bag of spanners) you'd regret it later. When there are no pictures of you with newborn.

That there is no right way, but many, many ways to get through parenthood. And that having a baby means that I now know what love is, for both my DS and my DH.?

Do not let the midwife make you lie on the bed during labour. Deliver the baby in the way that works best for you not for them!

You don't have to have everyone round after the baby is born. Take some time to enjoy your baby alone without making 100 cups of tea!

That when you are in b and q and your toddler asks to go for a wee - they will throw a massive tantrum and not understand why you won't let them do one in the bathroom display section.

When anyone offers you help in the first few weeks TAKE IT especially food. You will be extremely grateful for a meal that has taken no effort to prepare.

Also arrange for your salary to be paid directly to the chemist as this is where most of it will go

That you will no longer have pelvic floor muscles (after a vaginal birth)!

That you will never be able to have a sick day again until the DC have left home.