POO & WEE topic please

[Hullygully]

Isn't it time that a Poo and Wee section was introduced?

Lately we have had poos at Victoria Station, poos in socks, how good it feels to have a big poo, throwing wee at one's husband.

The time has come to give those that get off on poo/ find it amusing their own space so the rest of us can be spared it.

No you can't. Not even if the walking shoes are fantastic and cope well with treading in dog poo.

But Hully - it might encourage posters of a certain sexual nature to join MN?

If they've got their own topic - they could become even more graphic

Yes but that's fine. Each to their own etc, if they are all water closeted away somewhere, the rest of us are spared their gleeful pooey gloating.

Crikey Slubber, don't be encouraging al fresco evacuation. I'm all for a Great Outdoors topic (add me to your spreadsheet), but I don't want to be stepping in/over excretia.....

Actually - Weeing on your compost heap really does it good

Ask any gardener

Stop it deuxpoints. You veer dangerously close to the edge. Go start a "don't you just love it when hot wee accidentally dribbles down your inner thigh when you're trying to wee on the compost heap"

Oh yes, dog poo. I think there will be ructions. Some people will say that is absolutely fine to leave dog poo threads all over Mumsnet, and other people will say they should be bagged up and placed in the excretions topic.

I think this is just the thing to stop me vomiting into my workbin.

You wee in a bucket first Hully - then you throw it on the compost heap - I admit to doing it. I'm organic you see.

Oh in a bucket. Amateur.

I do feel that you are all trying to talk about fecal matters and this is a high brow, no-poo thread.

See, I really can't stay here because it's just. erk.

(I'm on day 2 of a Spectacular Hangover so I really can't stomach all this so I'm going to have to hide it in a minute)

Was it fun?

Amazing. I got chatted up by - well, do you remember that Little Briatain character that David Walliams did? The one who loved the grannies?

Him. The living embodiment of HIM chatted me up. It was...sinister.

In Germany ( or it could be Switzerland) they have toilets designed for close poo examination - ( poo catches i think they're called) because apparently, you can tell a lot about your health from the shape and colour of your poo.

They have a good look before flushing.

Did you give him one, you sauce pot?

We're not allowed a Friday Night Topic because it might attract weirdies but we are floating the idea of a poo topic?

Poor show indeed.

PS Did you see what I did with 'floating'? Good innit?

I didn't. He was uber creepy - but he gave me a bloody good laugh. Adn I did take the telephone number of a very sexy irish man but I am too scared to ring

Worst Chat Up Ever.

ring ring ring.

or text if too embarrassed.

deux points you are making me very very suspicious.

Scared to ring? Is there a gremlin in your phone?

Man up. Ring. And then come and tell us what he says to be sure.

Oh no. I don't think I can. I don't think I'm ready for all that. I might have felt ready when I was literally cross eyed with drink but in the cold hard light of day...?

I don't think I can. What would I text and say "heelo, I'm the utter pish head you met on Saturday - I'm not sure if I want a date or owt but HELLO ANYWAY!

Text and say

wellll, helllllo.

Actually, your idea's good. He may as well know what he's in for.