If you dislike "little monster" T shirts please read this

[bobbybob]

A shop in New Zealand called The Warehouse supports a Positive Parenting Programme. It also sells "little monster" and "little devil" type T shirts.

I complained that I thought that was a bad fit from a corporate point of view.

They have responded that "it sells well, especially in Auckland and the far North". The buyer also responded that every one else sells them.

I countered that the areas they sell best are also the areas where child abuse is more common, and that not everyone else claims to support Positive Parenting.

She also accused me of having no sense of humour, which I was prepared for, but I think a little outside the remit of a call centre employee.

What do I do next, and does anybody here fancy joining the crusade, even though it's little ol' NZ?

The article in the Observer so incensed me with it's air of smugness and it's total lack of awareness for other peoples taste that at the time I thought I must send a letter... but who has the time. Taste, that is all this comes down to, which is totally personal and not something on which others should be judged. Study the content of their characters not their superficial exteriors. The woman in the article is so obviously very concerned with the superficial. She seems to give a lot of thought to how she chooses to dress her own kids. Her desire to maintain there childhood and innocence are admirable but I suspect that she is as susceptible to notions of class and fashion as the rest of us mere mortals and although she seems oblivious to it, her choice of Rachel Riley clothes says as much about her lifestyle and aspirations as the slogan t-shirts say about others, perhaps even more.
I am so very tired of parents who seem to take so much pleasure in judging other peoples parenting choices particularly over such inconsequential things. I know that some of you think that these t-shirts are playing to stereotypes and reinforcing behaviour. But I just do not believe that. I do not think that parents buy these t-shirts to make jokes at their off spring's expense or revel in their bad behaviour and to suggest that is extremely harsh. All parents bristle when accused of mistreating their child and that is in essence what you are saying. If anything these t-shirts are an expression of affection and total acceptance for everything a baby or a toddler means to that parent or grandma or aunt etc. and perhaps a little nod to fashion. It may not be YOUR thing but don?t deny others their way of enjoying and relishing THEIR child and certainly don?t suggest that they are in some subtle way abusing them or belittling them.

Great post jojo - although I think bobbybob and ionesmum are well intentioned (that sounds patronising - isn't meant to be). However some people on mumsnet do very clearly judge others by these spurious yardsticks

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. That's what I love about Mumsnet - you can ask lots of different people for their opinions, they give them freely and then move onto the next thread.

Oh no... they stay and debate it till one cries in submission.

Jolly nice post jojo28.

Why thank you.. actually I was wondering (sorry totally non t-shirt related)hub, do you know a good plumber.... in the most wholesome way of course!!Your in N/NW London aren't you? See my Magnet Kitchen post below, any thoughts?

Sorry. All out of good plumbers. But do have my chippy who knows people.

I will check your posts, and if I think one of his mates might be useful, I'll post / CAT. (Repeat have NEVER met / worked with any of them).

Have to say re the Observer article than any mother who puts her boy in velvet knickerbockers is most definitely guilty of being a bad parent.

jojo, you are judging me. You are saying that I am taking pleasure in criticising other parents (I'm not) and that I would deny parents the chance to enjoy their children. You don't know anything about me. I do judge companies who set themselves up to be one thing and then do something differently. And I do judge manufacturers who set parents up in this way.

Ionesmum, you have not always confined your posts to the ethics of companies or manufacturers selling these t-shirts. You specifically spoke about family?s and parent's choices in comparison to your choices as a parent,
'basically it's a joke at your child's expense. We have a rule that we don't treat our children in a way we would find unacceptable ourselves, and as I wouldn't want someone putting a shirt on me with words I don't understand and having a laugh about it, we don't do it to the dds. And I'm aware that sounds snotty, but it's a principle that matters to me. ' What else are you inferring other than a parent who does put their child in a slogan t-shirt is being disrespectful to their child?

Okay, jojo, fair point, I can see it sounds that way. And I do object to these t-shirts because for some people they are making a child the butt of a joke, even though in the majority the parents themselves don't intend it that way. But do you seriously think I enjoy objecting to something? You seem to think I am just having a go or see myself as superior in some way. It's because I am so aware as a mother myself how easy it is to slip into negative thinking that I find these t-shirts so annoying. I don't give a st what parents give their kids to eat or whether they breast or bottlefeed, so long as a child is loved and respected. And I know that for the majority of parents who put their kids in slogan t-shirts it's just a bit of fun. And I myself call my children things like 'pickle' and 'terror' - it means nothing. But a visible label is very different, maybe not for the parent but for strangers. Generally I agree entirel with Hub2Dee's 'live and let live' attitude - if I object to anything it's only because something concerns me, not because I fancy having a go. But I really do think it's the manufacturers who should take the blame in this case.

Ionesmum, when I wrote the first post it was mostly with regards to that awful article in the Observer... I can't stand it when the Guardian or the Observer get their 'we know best' hats on as displayed in their letter writing campaign to American voters in Ohio. What a disaster that was. I still do not agree with you on your central point that these t-shirt are a form of negative labelling, how can they be if the parents intent is not negative but affectionate, which we both believe is generally the motive behind them. And as for how others interpret them, well I suppose there will always be people who misinterpret or pervert some things but that isn't negative parenting that's just negativity. I do not think that the t-shirts promote or encourage negative parenting I think there are far more pernicious and subtle influences in society that are responsible for that, whimsical t-shirts are not even the tip of the iceberg and should not warrant any real concern. I am now going to rescue my kitchen... Ionesmum it's been invigorating, by all means have the last word!

Maybe I can get my life back now (I really do spend far too much time on here...)

BTW I really agree with you re the Grauniad and the Observer. So partonising!

Sorry, that's meant to be patronising. Maybe partonising involves being played country and western music until you give in?

You've been good for me people.

I saw a T shirt with "bad boy" written on (size 8) and just thought. "Hey, maybe people find this funny, or maybe I'll see it reduced at the end of the season to $1". And then I walked away not annoyed. Brilliant I have been cured.

Honesty and humour, bobbybob ?

I'm glad the T-shirt didn't trigger any anger... it's much better for one's body to live in peace.

Do post when you end up buying one for your / friends' kids !!!!

I might be tempted at $1.