If you dislike "little monster" T shirts please read this

[bobbybob]

A shop in New Zealand called The Warehouse supports a Positive Parenting Programme. It also sells "little monster" and "little devil" type T shirts.

I complained that I thought that was a bad fit from a corporate point of view.

They have responded that "it sells well, especially in Auckland and the far North". The buyer also responded that every one else sells them.

I countered that the areas they sell best are also the areas where child abuse is more common, and that not everyone else claims to support Positive Parenting.

She also accused me of having no sense of humour, which I was prepared for, but I think a little outside the remit of a call centre employee.

What do I do next, and does anybody here fancy joining the crusade, even though it's little ol' NZ?

Maybe it's kiwi humour ?

(I think you're in / from NZ, right bb ?)

bb: when people call kids little monsters, sometimes it is because they are complete uncontrollable tearaway brats a la Supper Nanny candidates (and here I readily acknowledge this is almost invariably down to the parenting they have received), but sometimes it is just mocking their child-like (appropriate) behaviour... running around pretending to be animals, fairy-tale scenarios of dragons and castles etc. etc. ROAR !ing for the sake of it etc.

LOL@bowels of satan... I think that proves you have a sense of humour, but maybe to prove it fully you should buy one of those T-shirts, put it on your child and upload your photo to member's profiles ?

BTW: What do you think of those 'My grandma went to X and all I got with this lousy t-shirt' ? Is that ungrateful / spoilt etc. or funny ? (Aside from the crap humour, IYSWIM)...

How is it positive though?

I don't really see why supporting positive parenting would mean the shop shouldn't sell t-shirts with ironic slogans either. If the t-shirt said "evil little sh*t" then yes, I would want to protest about it too, but "little monster" is both ironic and what a lot of people would call their children in an affectionate manner and not in a negative way.

I don't like the t-shirts myself, but not because I see negative connotations in the slogan; I just think they're tacky.

The T shirts stop at about 18 months, imaginative play comes later. If I saw a child pretending to be a monster obviously I would compliment them on being a great monster.

I'm off to buy a "mother sucker" T shirt for ds, or maybe something from the "little shit" range of clothing.

I agree with you, bobbybob. It's all about labelling and the self-fulfilling prophesy, isn't it? i.e. if I label you a little monster, that is how you will act. You see it in families all the time, don't you; she's the clever one, he's the difficult one, what do you expect, she's a middle child etc. So children end up acting the way they are expected them too and the parents miss the good behaviour. I personally have no objection to these t-shirts, although I think the use of them may be short-sighted, but I agree entirely that a company that is setting itself up specifically as a promoter of the ideas behind positive parenting is being hypocritical by stocking them.

I don't think 'positive parenting' implies only things 'positive' in the 'outside world' IYSWIM... one aspect of PP is suitable, loving, DISCIPLINE, for example...

(Sorry out for day. Laters...)

Pmsl. Sorry but some parents just go over the top in my opinion.. lol!!! Who cares if he acts like a monster for a day because he's in a t-shirt? Wow he might roar or something... Do you think I confuse mine because he has t-shirts with monster/elephant/zebra/monkey/angel/fireman/pirates on them etc!! FGS!! I think there are far far more importnant things you should be worrying about.

I also agree with you Bobbybob, I can see why you are angry with this company - it does seem weird that they actively promote a parenting ethos that is against "labelling".
I have no quarrel with children's slogan tee-shirts, some of them are very funny, and I certainly don't think the children wearing them are badly parented
But I think the arguments put forward by the firm selling them are hypocritical and disingenuous. Go Bobbybob!

hub2dee, I agree with you entirely that positive parenting involves discpline. I just don't see giving a child a negative label is positive.

Fast sasleep, I guess it depends on what you mean by 'monster'. My dd1 loves pretending that there are monsters around and the boys at her pre-school like to pretend to be monsters and roar, which dd1 finds hysterical (dd herself prefers to be real animals.). Nothing wrong with imaginative play. But for a lot of people 'monster' refers to a person who displays a disruptive type of bad behaviour - tabloids even use it to describe sex offenders.

I agree, Marina, some slogan t-shirts are very funny, and even though some are naff they're naff in a cute way!

Phew, I was starting to think I was entirely on my own.

Hub - Positive Parenting is saying "We don't run around in the Doctors screaming (rule), look here's a Thomas the Tank Engine book to read (distraction)".

The opposite is saying "You are a little monster, stop that now!"

In my experience, when I have heard parents call their children "monster" it's generally been in play and said with affection, rather than a label used to discipline or humiliate the child. I have always seen these t-shirts to be using the word in that way rather than actively labelling the child in a negative way.

Precisely WWB!

Don't really like jokey tshirts of any kind

I think most parents would use the t-shirts to be funny. But I think they also get a lot of negative responses from people that don't know the child. If a child is wearing a shirt saying, 'Look out, I'm about to have a tantrum', then that is what everyone waits for.

I'd rather give my children a label that reflects their positives rather than their negatives.

Also can someone explain the role play behind the little devil slogan? Two year olds consigning their teddies to the bowels of hell, presumably

There could be a market for t-shirts saying:

"I'm over analytical and too serious" - just teaseing!

Got to say bobbybob, i'm completely with you on this one. I loathe these t-shirts, and think they are completely out of sync with a company that promotes positive parenting. They basically promote pp because its fashionable and will help sales...that's what this says to me.

I saw one of these t-shirts with ' out of control'on at the weekend.In what way is that amusing or ironic?

wasn't there a thread a while back about these awful t-shirts, and someone did a link to a site that sold ones that said things like'broken condom'???

Well, maybe there's a market for t-shirts to be purchased by dhs/ dps to be given to us saying 'I'm a moany old nag'. After all, it's meant affectionately, and Im sure we'd find it hilarious!

Oh, no, hang on, we actually have some say in what we wear...

Well I'd rather have him wear a t-shirt saying:

"Lazy, hopeless around the house and glued to sky sports"

however he probably would wear it....if he liked the colour and it flattered him..

On a more serious note however, moany old nag could not be said in an endearing way. But "Oooh you little monster, come here whilst I tickle you to death" - whilst smiling beningly at your offspring and mucking about with them, can be a term of endearment

Yes, but even if we mean something affectionately it doesn't mean others will see it in the same way. If we are saying words, then the connotations are more obvious through our body language and tone of voice. Written words are much easier to take wrongly and send out a negative message.

I call mine "little menace" - is that better or worse?!

Always said with affection though And during discipline I try and say what I see and address the behaviour and not label and all the other stuff...

But normal cute making a huge big mess with every available toy out while wearing a cheeky grin then trying to grab phones/older boy toys/dvds/ant traps ()... that's my little menace It even rhymes with his name if you distort both words disgracefully...

ionesmum - but a 1 year old can't read so can't mistake your tone of voice