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How long for men to cum?

36 replies

lauraUK1000 · 18/08/2024 17:09

Wondering how long it usually takes for husbands and boyfriends to cum and do they all actually cum quite quickly? Do they go long enough for female partners to be satisfied?

My husband is usually done in a couple of minutes now and would be great for him to go longer.

OP posts:
DoctorLove · 18/08/2024 17:16

Speaking as a man it can depend on a multitude if factors, how aroused I am, how long it's been since I last ejaculated, if my senses are impaired by drink, for some drugs may play a role.

Mileage may vary but from what I've heard anywhere from 3-10 minutes is considered average.

If you want your man to last longer maybe delay creams/sprays, use of a condom may help? Alternately he may want to have a tactical a few hours before...

PTown · 18/08/2024 17:23

DH (late 40s) usually goes for 20-30 mins at my preferred pace (slow), then once I’m tired, we change pace and it takes about 1-2 minutes.

GigiAnnna · 18/08/2024 19:31

He comes quite quickly. It's enough to make me have at least one orgasm from intercourse but it's probably only a couple of mins. I have a few orgasms during foreplay and so I come quickly during penetration. He can make himself last longer by slowing down and changing position, but it's enough for me. I wouldn't enjoy half an hour of thrusting.

Fs365 · 18/08/2024 21:43

That’s a how long is a piece of string question, depends on how much in the mood, how you are feeling, how tired or excited, what time it is & how since last time had sex

DixonD · 19/08/2024 00:18

In short, however long it takes me to. He always (bar the odd exception when he can’t help himself) waits for me to finish first.

MaxTalk · 19/08/2024 06:27

About 45mins to 1 hour when needed. Can be quicker if other techniques are used.

bedtimeisthebest · 19/08/2024 07:53

When I'm having a MMF threesome it can be almost a battle to make sure I'm not the first to cum, although that is dependant on who's getting what done to them.

I had a fun situation a few weeks ago when my wife was simultaneously masturbating both her fuck buddy and me, at the start of time together, and then she said 'the first to cum is the first to get fucked' and then we both tried to cum quickly, and it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be to cum on demand.

I can report that I didn't win this particular contest but was happy to sit back and watch

rkahic · 19/08/2024 14:23

Usually quite a while, maybe 20 minutes, think it’s more to do with getting old than anything, though have always stopped if getting near and know DW wants to carry on, believe they call it edging

Secondstart1001 · 19/08/2024 15:41

Half an hour at least to a bit longer as he will wait for me first but then he is ready to go again after 2 mins 😅 He is in his early 40’s and he will stop piv if he’s close to coming and can’t control it and just focus on me until I’m happy. There are things he can do to last longer such as stop the piv or you can go on top and slow it down.

thisismynewnamefornow · 19/08/2024 16:59

If he wears a ring around his sack it will delay him finishing. He may not want to of course, but it does work. They are cheap and easy to buy off Amazon

lucyandmike · 19/08/2024 18:45

My husband was normally around 5 minutes until he went on medication containing an SSRI almost 2 years ago. Since then his time to cum has steadily increased and he can be well over 30 mins to an hour even if he is just masturbating himself.

MrMidlife72 · 20/08/2024 00:36

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Parky04 · 20/08/2024 13:51

All depends on the position. Me on top then around 15-20 minutes, as I dictate the pace. From behind, around 3 minutes as he gets carried away!

Steve788 · 20/08/2024 15:18

lauraUK1000 · 18/08/2024 17:09

Wondering how long it usually takes for husbands and boyfriends to cum and do they all actually cum quite quickly? Do they go long enough for female partners to be satisfied?

My husband is usually done in a couple of minutes now and would be great for him to go longer.

If it’s been quite a while it might be a matter of minutes but typically around 15-20, sometimes longer.
it does depend on quite a few factors though

brunettemic · 22/08/2024 14:18

Depends on what you mean. Just reading the answers here they refer to different things. If you literally mean from the moment you start penetrative sex without stopping that varies for DH, he doesn’t go for ages and to be honest I prefer that. Some of the replies here imply an hour but that seems to include starting and stopping…so I guess what question are you asking.

bedtimeisthebest · 22/08/2024 15:28

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I used to work with a woman who would often really complain that her partner kept her up for hours as it would take all this time for him to cum and he would refuse to stop until he did.

She said she just got really bored every time, but consented to it as she loved him, but sometimes it would be 5 or 6 nights in a row,

Chipbarmandgravy · 22/08/2024 16:01

@bedtimeisthebest

I was once chatting to a woman in a bar who had slept with a very famous footballer (not one I think you would brag about) and described how she had to ask him to stop as she could not take any more metronomic thrusting (in was in the hours) Does make me smile when I see him on Sky.

cheshirebloke · 22/08/2024 16:16

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Me too, and sometimes it's incredibly frustrating. It usually takes me about 45 mins to 1 hr, but had occasions where it's taken getting on for 2 hours. My partner is usually fine with this and enjoys a good session (we only see each other a couple of times a month so it's not like it's daily), but often we give up and stop before I reach O. Very occasionally, it happens much quicker - 15 mins or so.

I never used to be like this. In my 20's I sometimes had the opposite problem, otherwise could usually pretty much cum on demand - when both of us were ready for it after about 20 minutes. Sometime in my 30's things started taking a lot longer. I'm definitely less sensitive down there than I used to be, which is normal for men to lose sensitivity as they age.

Other things I've noticed that affect how long I take to O, are extended foreplay before PIV - the longer that goes on for us (sometimes we have 30 mins to an hour of foreplay, cunnilingus etc, which is almost totally focussed on dp), the more the initial excitement has subsided, and the longer the sex lasts. Also, my dp likes piv to be hard and fast right from the start, which I suspect desensitises me somewhat. I prefer to start slow and build up pace. Usually my partner dictates the speed, but in certain positions I control it and keep things slower at the start.

Also, if it's not happening, a 5 minute break or a change position can sometimes quickly trigger an O. Rarely the same position that worked last time has the same effect next time though.

BeckysNanna · 22/08/2024 16:40

The lad I'm seeing it's quite quickly but he always makes sure I cum first which I absolutely love. So we have lots of foreplay and oral sex. Then once I have cum he usually cums PIV or in my mouth.

ScreamingDelight · 24/08/2024 15:52

It depends on how long its been since we have last been intimate, whether he has had any solo play, alcohol etc.

always make sure I reach O first though, thats just him being a considerate lover than any pressure from me.

Maybe 5 minutes or so i would guess, sometimes sooner. I don’t mind at all, and wouldnt enjoy being pounded for a long time, especially if I had already orgasmed.

bedtimeisthebest · 26/08/2024 08:24

When we first opened up out marriage to others, if I was going to spend time with a fwb my wife would always give me a bj before I left so I wouldn't cum too quickly with her.

PUGMEISTER21 · 29/08/2024 08:53

lucyandmike · 19/08/2024 18:45

My husband was normally around 5 minutes until he went on medication containing an SSRI almost 2 years ago. Since then his time to cum has steadily increased and he can be well over 30 mins to an hour even if he is just masturbating himself.

SSRI's are evil drugs for both men and women. I was on them for a while and my sex drive went through the roof, but found it extremely difficult to cum even when furiously masturbating. My female friend and I were laughing about the side affects of these. She was saying that she is now masturbating 4-5 times a day becuase of the drugs and doesnt know whether when she gets there if she is going to cum or shit herself. 😅

NDerbys32 · 29/08/2024 09:27

M60 here. On average, 15 mins or so but can go for over an hour. If in the mood for a quickie, it can be just that lol. Viagra helps me last longer, but I don't need to use it all the time.
I always make sure my wife gets off first though, whatever we're doing.

AverageGuy · 29/08/2024 09:28

It depends. Sometimes its quick, sometimes its not so quick.

I try to change things up so that I'm not just "pumping away", which can extend playtime.

M74 · 29/08/2024 10:00

I've always been super fast. Turning 50 soon and no signs of that changing. The best way to deal with this is how an ex partner did... she'd start by getting me off with a BJ and then we could forget about me and enjoy some foreplay and I could get her off at a pace and in ways that worked for her. Getting her off was always the biggest turn-on for me so by the time she'd finished I'd be hard again and we could do penetration, and I'd last a good length of time as I'd already finished once.

This worked brilliantly, made for long lasting sessions that felt really involved and enabled me to immerse myself in the intimacy and sensation of the penetration part without being pushed over the edge too quickly.

I think the secret, rather than seeing a man finishing quickly as a problem, is to work with it rather than trying to fix it, as my ex partner did.

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