For context: I live in a small village with a good life. We were due to go away over the BH weekend and I’d asked my neighbours to feed the cat… the H said he would be able to as his wife/kids were away and he had work.
Friday night we changed our plans and didn’t go away. I went down the path that separates our two properties (private and gated) and down the steps to tell him we didn’t need him. Except as I walked into the garden I could see he was masturbating. He had his back turned to the door so I could only see the back but it was obvious what he was doing. At this point I should have walked away but I’m ashamed to say I didn’t. I watched. Only sneaking away when it was obvious he finished. I don’t know why I did this, I was bought up to believe the act itself and certainly watching someone else is a big sin and therefore feel so much guilt. I can’t tell my H, I certainly can’t confess to him or his wife but I’m tearing myself up with guilt and shame.