To wonder how men feel ..

[IndiGlowie]

As women we all know that moment when we realise we are invisible to men . To most women it's a relief . As sex is such a big deal for men I wonder how they feel when they realise they are no longer sexually attractive to young women. Surely they too must become invisible to the opposite sec?

Sorry meant opposite sex

Cannot speak for all men, but I (personally) realised from a pretty early age that women were not really interested in me, so have probably been invisible to women for the last 45 years or so.
Generally I think most men are pretty invisible to the majority of women

Most men are invisible their whole life so it’s not really that much of an issue.

As a woman I hope I'm never invisible to men. I don't go out in short, low cut things, but Id like to think at 50 years of age, I still look good.
I hope Im always sexually attractive to someone. I was today. It made me feel happy.

I think if any person male or female still makes the effort to look good and has an air of confidence, the other sex will always admire.

I know I'm not hanging my stockings up just yet!

Completely agree. I think sometimes becoming invisible can be a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy. I have always been a bit shy around women in person, so have always felt a bit invisible unless I was in a relationship. As I am getting older, I am getting more confident but I dont think either sex automatically becomes invisible at a certain age. I think its largely to do with self confidence.

I agree. A cursory glance at porn 'categories' on the Internet will show you that there are plenty of men out there finding women attractive at any stage of adulthood.
Demeaning as much of the porn may be, its there and there are consumers of it.

I’m a 39yr old male.

married so don’t go out on the pull lol.

I’m no model but I get a lot more female attention now as a slightly greying middle aged man of non skinny stature than I ever did in my early adult years.

not saying I’m having 18yr old stunners throw themselves at me, because I’m not, but I regularly meet professional women of all ages in work and have a large circle of female friends, I’ve had blatant offers as well as flirting from far more women than I ever had 15-20 years ago.

it’s a nice ego boost but I doubt it’ll last long the grey hairs are bound to outnumber the dark ones at some stage and I can’t see me looking good as Philip schofield junior. Also can’t see me using just for men so might just shave it off!

i do work in a senior position with a lot of authority so maybe it’s not my looks at all but at my age any ego boost is worth seizing!

bottom line is someone somewhere will probably find you attractive whoever you are and whatever you look like. Age isn’t relevant I don’t think.

Well said @B1rd . It seems sad to think that we become invisible as we age, and I'm not sure that we do. I think as we move through the decades, the age of the people who may look our way increases. I was only thinking about that yesterday, as I wouldn't glance again at a man in his 20s or early 30s, but I definitely would at a man nearer my age (50). I often think how some men grow into their looks & get better with age too.
As @Anotherguy and @Thisismysexforumname said, I think some people attract more attention as they age, rather than less. It is a mixture of confidence and probably been less bothered about what people think. And things like grey hair are definitely seen as attractive features now - look at how many women (some younger women too), want to meet a "silver fox!"
When we look at new relationships in "mid life," there definitely is evidence that people are meeting and having a sexual relationship too, as they absolutely should, if that's what they want. The biggest rise in STIs is in this age group!
I think there has been a real noticeable shift over the last decade where people are less likely to put up with a poor relationship, and so they are finding themselves meeting & dating people more in their late 40s onwards.

I think sometimes becoming invisible can be a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy. I have always been a bit shy around women in person, so have always felt a bit invisible unless I was in a relationship. As I am getting older, I am getting more confident but I dont think either sex automatically becomes invisible at a certain age. I think its largely to do with self confidence

@Thisismysexforumname I think what you are describing is a different thing, if I go into a pub or walk down the street, women don’t stop and stare or turn around for another look in the way that men do towards attractive women of any age.

but if smile at women my age (50’s), or exchange a word or comment while waiting for a train of in a coffee shop, I’m much more likely to get a positive response then not- that’s more about self confidence than looks ( I think)

Maybe, I see what you are saying. I don't think I get second glances either to be honest, but certainly with age has come confidence, and I think that has a lot to do with it. I don't think I am any more better looking as I have got older, but I am certainly more comfortable with who I am. It feels a lot easier saying hello, and having a chat with people than it was 20 odd years ago. Maybe its a (sweeping generalisation alert) difference between the sexes?

Male pattern baldness, lumbar spine going awol and having to use a walking stick since, sealed the deal re becoming invisible, from a social interaction pov.

I'd echo this.

I've dated the last 4 years on and off and had no issue finding dates / mini relationships. Nothing has stuck yet for various reasons.

I definitely think it swings more towards men when older as in my 20s no women were really interested before my ex wife.

I think most men are invisible unless very attractive. But I think it also depends on context. I don't think I'd have much luck on a night out but have no issue via the dating apps.

being married I’m not on dating apps but I suspect I wouldn’t stand out in the crowd on them.

in my late teens/early twenties I was probably good looking in many eyes but probably so were most people I knew.

my wife says I’ve aged very well and she’s more concerned about women trying it on with me now than she was when I was 25! Our sex life isn’t great which doesn’t help but that’s a different story!

i don’t feel especially attractive but 100% I definitely get female attention now that I would have dreamed of if I were single 10-15 years ago

On dating apps you don't need to do much as a man to stand out from what I can gather.

Have a job, be in shape to some degree and not be a sex pest seems to cover most of the bases. Women haven't confirmed this but theyve not denied either and trust me Im no oil painting!

That’s why I wouldn’t use them if I was single.

im in a very senior role, paid well. I drive a couple of premium brand cars one of which is particularly expensive. I’d be very worried about gold diggers.

that said I’m currently wearing Asda jogging bottoms and cheap adidas t shirt!

This thread made me chuckle as I have reached an age when merely being alive renders me somewhat attractive to women of a similar age to myself. I am 65, soon to be 66, and many men of a similar age have already checked out. Their loss is my gain.

I am not saying that I have to beat the women away with a stick as I walk down the street, but I do get some attention. For example, I journeyed to London for the Queen's funeral and dressed for the occasion in a kilt and when I got on the tube a woman said to me, "How handsome". We chatted a little until she got off and it was obvious that I was not invisible. When I got to Constitution Hill an attractive woman, somewhat younger than me, asked if she could stand beside me. I of course said she could, and we proceeded to have about five hours of conversation. Again, it was obvious that I was not invisible.

My recommendation for men of my age would be to wear a kilt, as it often seems to attract positive remarks, and you definitely will not be invisible when dressed in one.

Well the last two posts have made me smile!
@Anotherguy - I'm not sure if you've heard about the attraction that some women have for men in grey joggers? It's a thing apparently!
And @xpc316e , I wonder if the ladies were trying to answer the age old question of whether men wear anything under their kilts?!

if it matters, i feel totally invisible. I've been actively trying to find a relationship for 2 years, tried and continue to try the hell of OLD with no success, 4 dates in total, only 1 which got to a 2nd date, to be then told i reminded her too much of her Ex. A few text conversations, that dissipate within a few days, and that's about it. I try to attend events and socialise, but very rarely meet single women. The couple of times this year where i've struck up a conversation with someone new, exchanged drinks or whatever, when i've asked if they'd be interested in a meal/drink/date etc i've been shot down in flames, which works wonders for the confidence, Lol, but i remain optimistic. My only salvation is i have a FWB i meet a couple of times a month, which takes the edge off. I'm 55, but I think i look reasonable, not overweight, dress ok, own my house, have a good business, good level of education, quite outgoing and fun, a young attitude, but no joy, and i do wonder what women are looking for from a man.

I am always pleased when my wife comments about my body. We are both 75 and I love her saying "nice bits" or similar when she sees me naked.
I really doubt any other lady would say the same

I hear you, I’m about the same age and have had the same kinda journey over the last couple of years.
I also found OLD a waste of time ( personally I think OLD is waste of time and effort for most average men ).
i often read on this forum that there are no decent men left and it also makes what a decent men might look like, cos it’s clearly not me.

I think the older a guy gets, the more attractive he is. I'm 35 and the majority of men I find attractive are between 45 and 60. Well except my bf, he's 37 🤣. I'm just weird I guess .

I am also wary about OLD. You obviously don't have to be now. I have a career, a lovely house without a mortgage and savings etc. I would like to meet a man who has made the best of himself. But I'm very choosy about who I swipe right on, to the point that I rarely swipe right. I still maintain that the best way to meet someone is at work, but the company that I work for is about 90% female heavy.

So whilst I can say that for the last 4 months, I haven't had a match, I don't necessarily consider that OLD isn't working for me. I look daily, but after looking at the profiles of men, some just don't make the effort with their photos or themselves! They could also be improved if they wrote something about themselves, or what they were looking for. I look for humour in profiles. It's essentially an advert. So why wouldn't people try and make the effort to advertise themselves to their full potential?! I can also state that I'm not on a horse, in a crowd of people and don't have any filters, bunny ears or otherwise on my profile!

For now, I'll stick with vibrators!

As a middle aged woman some of the opinions expressed here have made me feel very sad! The notion of being considered invisible because bodies age, skin wrinkles and abilities change is depressing and I’m not having it.

Please don’t sway to this this vapid and superficial attitude. We are all worthy, vital and capable of bringing more than a collection of physical attributes to a social interaction!!

I can assure you that it's not true. Just because a few people have expressed the opinion that they have become invisible to others at a particular age does not make it fact.

I've always been invisible to women, regardless of age (mid 40's now).