Tips for guy who takes a while to ejaculate?

[Gettinguptostuff]

In a lovely new relationship, but he is on medication that one of the side effects is taking longer to ejaculate. This is better than premature ejaculation for me but just looking to see if there are any tips etc on how I could help? Positions etc?? He did ejaculate, but did take quite a while,(well longer than I’m used to but no way a deal breaker) which is ok but I was getting a little sore I have asked him if I can do anything specific etc but he is quite shy and says he is just happy to be having sex.. which is lovely but just wondering if anyone had any tips?

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Perhaps get him closer by hand before PIV?

@MissConductUS yes I did wonder that…

Massage his balls, usually works.

@DannyGirl88 ah ok thanks. Not sure if I’m any good at that, I’ll try it!

I can sometimes suffer from DE as well, no meds,
Unfortunately there are times I just can’t “get there”, and actually want to stop!
No tips unfortunately, but don’t let it get you down as he probably getting a bit sore himself. ( and maybe a bit bored, but he would never ever say that)

Well. As a guy who very occasionally can’t orgasm through PIV ( in a long session with my lovely partner I kinda “plateau” ) I find nice gentle balls and shaft stroking, with cuddles, whispering in the ear and some naughty words always gets me off.
But not before she has been satisfied which is where I really get my pleasure from,

“Plateau”, is a great way of putting it.
If you read about sexual responses it’s sometimes called the “point of no return “, or “ ejaculatory inevitability ” or “ orgasmic inevitability.”, and while the sex can be great, there can be times when you just don’t get to that point.

www.sharecare.com/health/sex-orgasm/when-men-point-return-sex

Cradle his balls.

I would focus on the brain first and maybe the two of you can explore what really turns the other on and explore?

These are the top kinks from a recent survey I found..

Women’s top 10:

Sex outdoors
Blindfolded sex
Body piercings
Role play
Dressing up/sexy costumes
Filming each other having sex (DIY porn)
Domination/submission
Food play
Spanking and whips
Tying up

Men’s top 10:

DIY porn
Role play – specifically with uniforms
Bondage – spanking and whips
Sex outdoors
Threesomes
Rubber/latex and leather
Domination/submission
Body piercings
Food play
Blindfolded sex

For me getting either mine or my wife's head firmly in the game means it really revs up our engines!

Also lube, lube, lube!!

Good Luck!

Wow ok thanks everyone. Must brush up on ball cradling skills! The relationship he was in wasn’t great and the partner he was with I know they hadn’t slept with each other for quite a while so I’m wondering if perhaps that hasn’t helped? He was very complementary and said he really enjoyed our session… I just want to do what I can to help him and make it even better for us both? The session was a little ‘rushed’ to be fair as we were gagging for it so I think when we meet next we will take it a bit slower, I particularly need a little more work and we did talk openly about that so I’m really glad we can talk about it.

Can anyone comment at all about the mental impact on DE? I’m guessing if you have had mental health struggles this may cause DE too? In the same way it can affect females?

I agree with the suggestions above.

It may also work to massage his p-spot (prostate). It will often result in very intense orgasms.

@Gettinguptostuff
So DE has a small impact on me, sometimes I get bit worried during sex that I won’t be able to cum, it sort of plays on my mind and sometimes I think it’s a self fulfilling prophecy.
Also it means that there might be no natural end to a session, as the male partner is the normal end.

It does get me down a bit, and sometimes I wonder if a partner might think less of me, but she says not..

Your other comments suggest he hasn’t had much in the way of regular good quality, not rushed sex recently, you might find that having more regular sex might help as he gets comfortable with letting go

I worry a little about DE. My partner likes me to finish inside, she tells me it gives her pleasure.
So when I’m in action and nothing is happening I can feel myself getting uptight and a bit embarrassed.
She’s lovely about it though and it’s normally ok the next time.. but I do worry about it tbh.

@Janesmom he has made it clear that is an exit not an entrance which suits me as o feel the same

@curmudgeonly007 this is exactly what I am wondering, if non regular sex for quite a while may have made DE worse, but not being a guy I wasn’t sure of the biology side of things. I have known him a long time (just not in this capacity!) so helps that we do talk, so I’m hoping second time (when I won’t be as nervous!) will be even better.

@Shunter350 I like a guy to finish inside too but wouldn’t be a deal breaker. I think it’s nice that you worry (not that you should worry!) as it means her thoughts are important to you.

As a side note, I didn’t know about the DE thing until afterwards. It made sense, I honestly thought he would be done in 2 minutes and I’d be left feeling rubbish! He told me I ‘broke’ him which he assures me is a compliment and has said how much he enjoyed it so fingers crossed it will only get better

Men have few different sexual dysfunctions,
The most common 2 are the most well known
ED & loss of sex drive

www.nhs.uk/live-well/sexual-health/male-sexual-problems/

Ejaculation has 3 different possible issues, everyone knows about premature, the others are less well known
www.nhs.uk/conditions/ejaculation-problems/

I suspect if you have more regular sex he might relax into it a bit more

Think the secret is patience, tolerance, kindness, touch, warmth and loads of kisses and cuddles.. for me anyway!

@Shunter350 I can definitely

Can I just ask guys another question please? With DE, would this affect the ‘volume’ that comes out? Sorry to be gross but I haven’t slept with loads of guys, my exh had a lot of err volume and would be dripping down me as I ran off to the toilet and then kindly remind me throughout the day, whereas with new guy there wasn’t much there? Or is it just all guys produce a different amount?

I LOVE i can ask these questions on here, thanks everyone

The volume is generally the same for all men, but can affected by lots of different factors, health, drink. Drugs, hydration levels, but no the DE doesn’t affect that for me (AFAIK), but then I don’t measure it !

www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/how-far-can-a-man-shoot

A teaspoon?? No way, it’s so much more than a teaspoon!

Volume in my case is variable. Depends how tired ( or not ), how horny ( or not ), if I’ve eaten recently, stress etc.
My partner finds it hard to believe ( I think ) that for me at least, the ejaculation is the greatest pleasure for me ( although very nice!) it’s being with her on a long session. Loads of touching, cuddles, giggles and seeing her pleasure is my emotional climax.

Blast. That should read “ejaculation ISN’T the greatest pleasure…”

@Gettinguptostuff

A teaspoon?? No way, it’s so much more than a teaspoon!

Average is 5ml, a teaspoon

www.menshealth.com/health/a19538361/semen-during-sex/

Crazy seems so much more than that, not as if I’m getting out my measuring jug or anything.

Interesting @Shunter350 thanks for that input

I have never experienced to my knowledge it being a teaspoon, although granted I can't be precise when he has come inside me. However, I doubt a teaspoon would start trickling out either down my leg, or into my knix for a good part of the day.