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Original poster

Fuck me up the arse!

58 replies

dazzlerdo · 18/07/2021 22:47

Basically in a period so don't want sex. He said can't I not fuck you up the arse! The biggest turn off ever in my eyes.
Said no I don't like it I do t want to.
He said fair enough... but if you wanted something I did t like I'd do it to please you and make you happy.

Aibu
Or his he?

OP posts:
Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:04

Tell him as others have “you go first with this” , (giant dildo) what is with men and their obsession with anal, I wouldn’t do it think that’s partly why dh doesn’t bother about sex now. No don’t you have sex with him, cheeky burger.

Inthesameboatatmo · 18/07/2021 23:06

Offer to do it to him first, what a fuckin prick of the highest order.
What is it with men and anal lately?
I'm blaming porn

Nancydrawn · 18/07/2021 23:07

Not only is he not respecting you, he's put it in just about the least appealing way possible. Not a master seducer, is he.

(For the record, it wouldn't matter in the least if he said that he would be delighted if you'd peg him first. You don't want to do it, so that's that.)

roopants · 18/07/2021 23:07

Indeed, he's the one with prostate so he should enjoy it even more!

Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:10

Don’t think it’s porn with mine ,he’s always been bi, but Friday has had a rainbow tattoo on his hand of the bi colours, (wait till his dad sees this) he’s always said about anal and up the arse. To be honest I’ve given up means I can lust away to hearts content my silver foxes.

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/07/2021 23:17

TMI but I am ok with anal, have to be in the mood but I wouldnt be at all bothered by a man asking to do that. But "Cant I just fuck you up the arse?" is just revolting. Apart from the fact that it basically reduces you to a collection of holes as opposed to a human being with wants and desires of your own, its the opposite of fore play because it is guaranteed to put you off! Yuck.

Footnote. Is there a word for the opposite of foreplay.....? Foreclosing perhaps?!

Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:20

Opposite of fore play my ex did this painting by numbers, same routine every time. Guarantee to put anyone off.

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/07/2021 23:25

@Holothane

Opposite of fore play my ex did this painting by numbers, same routine every time. Guarantee to put anyone off.
Oh yeah....I had an ex who was painting by numbers, it got to the stage that I could count to the second..."left nipple x secons, right nipple x seconds. Clitoris (if I was VERY lucky and he managed to find it) 10 seconds tops, fingers inside....ages" because I think he thought I would orgasm that way so he could bang away without considering my needs as he had heroically "sorted me out" first. Didnt last long, couple of months maybe, as my attempts at retraining were falling on deaf ears. Ironically he declared himself to be great in bed and making it "all about her" He's still single many many years later, oddly enough :o
Hemsbyboc · 18/07/2021 23:27

I'd be up for this.
Get the strap on ready

Kanaloa · 18/07/2021 23:31

Whether you’re interested in anal or not, that come-on has got to be the least sexy thing since Boris Johnson.

‘Can I not fuck you up the arse?’ I mean it’s hardly high romance, that would put me off even if I was interested.

Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:33

I tried for two yea5s then gave up just lay there, he was never any good and have you noticed they always think they’re great, it’s the woman’s fault she does come or like sex?.

Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:34

Sorry doesn’t come.

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/07/2021 23:38

@Holothane

I tried for two yea5s then gave up just lay there, he was never any good and have you noticed they always think they’re great, it’s the woman’s fault she does come or like sex?.
Oh yeah! If we dont enjoy sex they dont google "How to have the best sex with my wife" but "My wife wont come during sex, whats wrong with her"

I am sure that there was a thread on here that mentioned it, may be the "John learns to adult" one, he was convinced he was a sex God and if the OP didnt agree well, obviously, there was something wrong with her!

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/07/2021 23:40

Oh and I have just remember something I saw on FB the other day.

It was a screen shot of a problem page type thing about sex.

"My GF has a kink of always masturbating after sex. Anyone know what thats all about?" and underneath was one comment..

"OMG who's gonna tell him?" :o

Holothane · 18/07/2021 23:48

Haha😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂know that one, even with dh (years ago now) I still had my own orgasm to sort out. Today my dream sex is better than any man I’ve had,

Estherpologist · 19/07/2021 07:17

I've done things for partners that did nothing for me, so I see his where he's coming from. But you should only do things because you are comfortable with them.
If he's just after sexual gratification there are all kinds of things you could do other than anal. Thought anal can be great for both partners. It's possible this is just a clumsy way for him to ask for something he'd like to try. The only way you'll find out is through open and honest conversation.

Naunet · 19/07/2021 09:10

@Estherpologist

I've done things for partners that did nothing for me, so I see his where he's coming from. But you should only do things because you are comfortable with them. If he's just after sexual gratification there are all kinds of things you could do other than anal. Thought anal can be great for both partners. It's possible this is just a clumsy way for him to ask for something he'd like to try. The only way you'll find out is through open and honest conversation.
She’s already made it clear in her OP that she doesn’t like anal, what else needs to be said?
PinotPony · 19/07/2021 11:31

I don't necessarily think he was wrong for suggesting anal as an alternative to PIV... there are plenty of women who like it.

BUT... the way he phrased it is revolting and incredibly objectifying. He sounds like an immature twat.

You've told him no. That should be the end of it. If he tries to persuade you again, you know what to do..!

beeloubee · 20/07/2021 16:44

No chance.

Tryinghardfornothing89 · 21/07/2021 13:17

I feel like what he said is true to agree, but not with anal!. If my partner asked me to dress a certain way or do something new I wasn't particularly bothered about doing if they hadn't asked, I'd probably do it. But to say that about anal sex is crazy, and wouod essentially be rape if you're not into it at all! You are not being unreasonable.

ScottishZoe · 21/07/2021 16:04

YANBU

bedtimeisthebest · 25/07/2021 12:43

Respect of the other person's likes and dislikes are paramount in any relationship.

My wife and I have an open marriage and FwBs too.

Our two golden rules are safe sex and no anal.

This has to adhered to at all times, much more the no anal. Safe sex may be dropped after a while but the no anal rule applies permanently and my wife dropped one man who kept asking for it .

Topia · 25/07/2021 13:05

I would grab the biggest cucumber I could find and go at him without lube. See how he likes it first

newnortherner111 · 25/07/2021 16:48

I second the cucumber idea, though better still would be to end the relationship.

Original poster
dazzlerdo · 26/07/2021 09:07

Thanks all for your replies, they did make me laugh!

We have been together 15 years and have 2 dds together. He's never usually like that, I think the fact that he'd had a few drinks turned him into a massive dick that night.
He has apologised for how he spoke to me, warned not to do it again or the cucumber will come out!! Grin

OP posts:

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