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Original poster

What do you think of whilst masturbating?

37 replies

aweirdtopic · 09/04/2021 16:15

Okay, sorry weird question but I struggle with my thoughts during masturbation.

I either think of one of DH's best friends (WEIRD and have no idea why!) or really inappropriate un-sexy thoughts enter my mind. It's really frustrating.

Any tips?!

OP posts:

maggie1862 · 09/04/2021 16:43

I just do it and let it happen unless I have some female friendly porn on .
only think of things if edging and rarely do that in case I lose my drift .

Didydani · 09/04/2021 17:00

Its not a wierd question. Quite normal actually and for me I think of the person I'm attracted to (my friend) and that turns me on amongst other things, like porn. Not all porn though, specific things.

nonflirtinghusband · 09/04/2021 17:01

I fantasize about random men or celebrities.
Sometimes I listen to Dipsea - you could try that?

Estherpologist · 09/04/2021 17:26

Sometimes I just think about getting it over with.

Original poster

aweirdtopic · 09/04/2021 22:45

@Estherpologist ha yes I kind of know what you mean!

OP posts:

Original poster

aweirdtopic · 09/04/2021 22:45

@nonflirtinghusband I have thought about this. Do you have to pay for it? Would you rate it?

OP posts:

Parkerwhereareyou · 09/04/2021 22:53

Gosh, now that would be telling 😉

It depends. I have my favourite go-to quick result fantasies. Then depending on what’s going on in my life, I have other more exploratory/imaginative adventures.

I know you want to know the details, don’t you?!

everywhichway · 09/04/2021 23:24

You going to tell us then Parker?!

MisterT373 · 10/04/2021 00:13

Usually that it shouldn't be such hard work. Then its either a quick look at Celebjihad or remembering fun at various swinging venues

PermanentTemporary · 10/04/2021 00:51

I have a range of quite complex and structured fantasies that work for me, or I read literotica. My fantasies almost never involve myself.

StarlightLady · 10/04/2021 03:30

I very much zone out and go blank to the world. I focus on the sensations.

Parkerwhereareyou · 10/04/2021 05:43

An interesting extra thought about this: who exactly do you think about as you masturbate?

When I was in a committed monogamous relationship for ages, I was so scrupulously good that only fantasised about him too. Like a kind of childlock on my mind.

Then as the relationship weaknesses started to show, I started letting myself think about other people.

Sometimes friends or other people would pop into my head as potential protagonists, but I'd mostly stick with more imagined ideal co-hosts.

When I was out properly of the relationship in my head, my first bf took over in my fantasies. Absolutely perfect. He is my default lover.

But now I'm finding that if someone new appears in RL, they make an entrance (as it were!!?).

I love that in your head you can fuck whoever you like, as many times as you like, and in as many ways as you like ...
(spot the deliberate reference ;) ...

everywhichway · 10/04/2021 08:51

PinotPony · 10/04/2021 09:09

Totally depends on how I'm feeling in the moment but recently it's involved me, DP and a lovely couple with whom we have arranged a post-lockdown date! Rather excited at the thought of four bodies writhing together! 😉

nonflirtinghusband · 10/04/2021 09:55

@aweirdtopic I do quite like it and there's a free trial I think. I ended up subscribing after trying it. I don't use it every time, just when the mood takes me!

blowinahoolie · 10/04/2021 21:58

@StarlightLady

I very much zone out and go blank to the world. I focus on the sensations.

Same. Usually just want that release.

jessstan2 · 11/04/2021 00:21

It might have been better to have given this thread the title, 'If you masturbate, what do you think of?', because a lot of people don't.

I do occasionally, I envisage imaginary and highly romantic scenarios with a man who is a mixture of people I may have known but not a specific person. In the fantasy I am not quite what I am now. I'm always quite lovely :-).

Danceswithwhippets · 11/04/2021 06:14

Like @parkerwhereareyou I had a default fantasy lover. Mine was my second ever girlfriend from university days (I'm a man). In terms of quality of sex, I would say she was up there in my top two or three lovers.

We have remained good friends ever since, through marriages and relationships. We live a long way apart, but speak regularly, meet up perhaps once a year and often stay at each other’s homes. Sadly, we’ve never gone to bed again since uni days- I tried to seduce her some years back when we were drunk but she turned me down. That had the effect of breaking the erotic link -ever since I’ve had to use other women for my fantasies.

I’ve never told her how useful she was in my fantasy sex life. Still good friends IRL though.

Since then I’ve used random women, all real people I either have or have not (but would like to) slept with, but they just don’t match up to her.

SparklingStars10 · 11/04/2021 09:03

I just lie back and think of England

Estherpologist · 11/04/2021 09:23

@SparklingStars10 Just the 1st XV or the whole squad?

NamechangeApril21 · 11/04/2021 10:14

@jessstan2 I agree - my fantasies tend to be more about me (ie a better version of myself that I don't have the confidence to be IRL) than the man.

Parkerwhereareyou · 11/04/2021 10:45

I think it also depends a bit what your situation is and the purpose really of it ... so, in a long term relationship I would just masturbate in front of him, because he liked that (I think liked the lack of responsibility as well) and I then had my eyes open and only yes did it with physical stimulation.

Sometimes I'd wake up in the night or something, or in the morning and he was still sleeping or just waking up, and I'd do it with my eyes closed thinking about him, then he'd just get hard and it would progress to sex.

I've had some v bad sexual experiences with him too, along the way, but of course in my fantasies it always went how I liked, so it kind of kept me in a place that was bearable. (How our minds come to our rescue to make it all ok! But denial is also such a time-waster long term - doesn't always help).

Now, though, I'm operating differently. He is gone (because was too bad in many ways) and I've had to completely wipe the memory cache of him, because any thinking of sex with him just perpetuates a pointless myth.

So now I'm exploring thinking about anything and anyone I like, which is turning out to be quite amazing! There so much you can do in fantasy that you (probably) wouldn't do in real life ...

SparklingStars10 · 11/04/2021 11:39

@Estherpologist - Lol! On a more serious note, I’m very much the same as @StarlightLady, pretty much go blank to the world and lose myself in the sensations I am feeling.

monkehsee · 11/04/2021 20:01

This may be tmi but I think of DP going down on me or the feeling of him touching me and kissing me. Works almost every time.

withmycoffee · 11/04/2021 22:01

@Danceswithwhippets

Like *@parkerwhereareyou* I had a default fantasy lover. Mine was my second ever girlfriend from university days (I'm a man). In terms of quality of sex, I would say she was up there in my top two or three lovers.

I’ve never told her how useful she was in my fantasy sex life. Still good friends IRL though.

Since then I’ve used random women, all real people I either have or have not (but would like to) slept with, but they just don’t match up to her.

What made her so good compared to the other women you have had sex with?

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