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Original poster

How Long...

67 replies

GeorgiePeachie · 23/08/2017 15:04

Despite the slightly suggestive title. I'm just wondering how long people are having sex for.

My current FWB's average is about 4 hours. NOW that is with breaks sometimes little breathers of a minute or two and sometimes longer like half and hour or an hour then start again. He either doesn't finish at all or it takes a long time.

I realise from talking to my IRL friends that that is a LONG time and definitely a problem for him..He is circumcised so needs a lot of stimulation/focus for it to happen. Constant significant stimulation for about 15 minutes at the end.

So I was wondering what a typical FULL session from start to finish would be for you? AND any suggestions to help me cut the time down?

Not a Daily Fail hunter, penis beaker, stunt pineapple,

OP posts:
gamerwidow · 23/08/2017 18:27

Sex really shouldn't be painful or ending with a visit to the hospital. For what it's worth we normally take 15-30 mins all in which is plenty of time to get us both to where we need to be.

Ahardmanisgoodtofind · 23/08/2017 18:28

Op I need more information on hospital and injuries because I'm a nosey cow
Bout 10mins piv here, unless there's alcohol involved then it can take bloody hours. 10mins is all I need though. An old flame used to take hours and hours. It got boring. Eventually we worked out it was nerves, he was so nervous/eager to please that he was holding back. Blindfold, massage, teasing and bam bought his time down to suit me.

tearsinmyeyes · 23/08/2017 19:28

My fully circumcised OH finishes off in seconds so I doubt it's that .

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 23/08/2017 19:38

Hospital? Twice? No,no,no!

RhinestoneCowgirl · 23/08/2017 19:45

Usually 45 mins from first move to finish. Don't know how long the PIV element would be as I've never kept and eye on clock during...

But if it hurts you just stop surely? Occasionally it's been going on too long and I ask DH to stop and we do something else.

pudding21 · 23/08/2017 20:01

Georgie: even on our longest sessions I've never felt pain or been injured. What were the injuries? Cos he's banging too hard? Sounds y pleasant. Most of the time our long sessions are slow and gentle. We do use a lot of lube though.

mogulfield · 23/08/2017 20:09

From start to finish 30 mins, 10-15 mins of that PIV. I'd be in agony after 4 hours (DH too well hung!)

TheNaze73 · 23/08/2017 20:20

Anything between 30-90 minutes

NewMummyMNetter · 23/08/2017 21:36

I just spoke to my husband about this. And his reply has me in stitches!!
He said tell your FWB to stop wanking before you go at it..... that's the only way he'd be lasting that long!!!

Now if my hubby is write OMG!!

Blokenamechangesexboard · 24/08/2017 09:24

30 minutes to an hour; about 5 minutes PIV at the end; plus extra time on DW's bits. Would prefer it a bit quicker.

Original poster
GeorgiePeachie · 25/08/2017 10:37

so a little more info...
definitely is not masturbating before he sees me. we've been off and on for many years and it has been this way every time and I know that sometimes he won't for like 2 or 3 days before seeing me to try and get it down. still no joy.

Injuries I have gone to doctors for have been internal bruising types, at one point I thought a twisted ovary as it was so painful but turns out it wasn't. I'm a bit careful with angles heading to my right side though even now. The worst thing is that my skin is obviously pretty sensitive and I end up tearing/splitting sometimes after a while.

Circumcision. I don't know if it makes a difference but he wasn't circumcised at birth... was at around 10 years old and it was for medical reasons so it was causing him pain before... and then apparently it did not go that well. the scars he has, when I take the time to notice/compare with others I've seen are really quite bad. other people have quite a neat clear line. basically I do think it has something to do with his sensitivity being pretty low.

Anal seems to make everything faster... but I think that's a mental thing for him and turns him on... but obviously... equally as painful for me.

Lube is an interesting topic as well... although we've used lube in the past and reapplied and everything. The friction ends up being sticky AND hot and then I split and then we reapply and then it stings and then its hot and stingy and ugh. lube tends to make things worse not better.

He is very muscly and has a lot of strength/not much padding so can be painful from that. But it DOES feel good and I like having sex with him and everything turns me on and is great and he does go slow and he makes me orgasm all the time which helps...

OP posts:
SleepFreeZone · 25/08/2017 10:45

I used to have four hour sex sessions with my ex and I have to say they were brilliant 🙊

SleepFreeZone · 25/08/2017 10:47

Sorry Georgie I just saw your last post and it really shouldn't be hurting or tearing!! That sounds awful. I did used to get a bit of thrush occasionally I have to admit but I never tore or anything 😬

Batteriesallgone · 25/08/2017 10:53

You are carrying on after you tear?! WHAT?

My word. I get that he's giving you orgasms and all but you aren't obliged to be his fuck hole if he can't stop himself from hurting you.

How long I can handle penetration for hugely depends on the build up, position, what we're doing etc. But once it gets a bit friction-y it's game over for me and we need to finish quick. I can understand letting a little soreness happen because you know he's super close but tearing and bruising? Geez. Aren't you worried about doing yourself a permanent injury?

Original poster
GeorgiePeachie · 25/08/2017 11:07

SleepFreeZone OKAY can you describe in a bit more detail? sex for four hours how did you NOT tear/ friction burn. Thrush has been a problem for us as well in the past and since I've stopped getting it, the pain has been less but still happens.
How are you not tearing? I've tried drinking loads of water for skin elasticity and all kinds of things.

OP posts:
SleepFreeZone · 25/08/2017 11:14

God it was years ago so I'm not sure I can remember in that much detail 😬 We started with a FWB relationship then went exclusive, but only saw each probably once every two weeks. I think that's why they would turn into shagathons but maybe that also gave me healing time.

I have no idea why I didn't tear or anything. It wasn't four hours of him banging away!! There was all sorts of non penetrative stuff going on with toys and different positions plus a tea break lol

Original poster
GeorgiePeachie · 25/08/2017 12:15

Maybe I should have asked how to prevent soreness/tearing during sex in general.

OP posts:
DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 25/08/2017 13:04

Is he a coke head?

ApplesTheHare · 25/08/2017 13:21

Ah OP, sex shouldn't cause any injuries, and this history of injuries in itself (let along all the other comments on here) suggests 4 hours is too long! Nobody should be going beyond dryness/friction/injuries.

user1473256244 · 25/08/2017 13:32

Come off the pill if you're on it.

I suffered for years with tearing and soreness and was investigated
/referred and seen by specialists. Came off the pill for my own reasons and suddenly no thrush, no pain during sex. Can easily go for 4 hours of sex now. I have loads of my own natural lubrication - (it literally drips out of me when I'm turned on) and no pain at all during sex.
Just have to think of other contraception.........

Docs/nurses will never, ever advise you to come off the pill, but everyone i know who has, feels so much better for it.

Batteriesallgone · 25/08/2017 13:50

Oh that's true user the pill really can mess with natural lubricant and can make the skin thinner / more prone to friction injury (guess linked to the lack of lube but I think it's a additional thing too).

Original poster
GeorgiePeachie · 25/08/2017 14:24

Not into drugs at all. doesn't drink. paleo diet. no dairy no wheat. nothing processed. Health Freak and body builder. Used to use createin but doesn't now because it made him bloat.

Hmm the pill... I am on the pill. But don't really have a problem with lubrication in general... get wet fine and everything but even if we were to add lube the pain and friction comes at the exact time as if I wasn't using any so seems pointless.

interesting that it make make skin thinner.

But I like the pill as our contraception method and using condoms would mean he never finishes at all... don't think coming off the pill is an option for me... plus I dunno how long we will keep this up and I like the pill for everything else...

OP posts:
DipsyLaLa22 · 25/08/2017 14:27

You mentioned that he is very big and muscly...Is he using steroids? Classic history of wanting sex but unable to come.

Batteriesallgone · 25/08/2017 14:39

Yeah this does sound like it could be due to steroid abuse.

And don't think he'd tell you - I had an ex swear blind he wasn't using steroids and I 100% believed him. Then I found some.

badabing36 · 25/08/2017 14:41

I think this sounds awful. He's hurting you. I'm guessing he knows he's hurting you, so he should stop straight away no question. Who cares he hasn't come yet. He doesn't sound great in bed he sounds like a nasty bastard. There is nothing wrong with your anatomy hours of 'vigorous' sex is not something you need to put up with because you enjoy the first 30mins or so.

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