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Sex

Anal sex gives me the most pleasure, this makes me feel a bit weird/ bad

18 replies

Unsureofmyneeds · 16/07/2016 14:16

Posting in chat so it will disappear, not a troll and very happy for MNHQ to check out my posting history. Of course if they say it's got to be moved to the sex topic I understand but I would prefer to talk about this knowing it won't exist once it expires.

As per title - I feel slightly weird, slightly embarrassed and slightly flawed because anal penetration is my biggest turn on Sad I want it so much before I orgasm and then afterwards I feel ashamed. I have a perfectly normal vagina, and orgasm well there, but when really turned on I sink to this primal level where I crave anal. The physical feelings I get are - insanely good. Wtf is wrong with me? It's like the orgasms I have there give me pleasure in my whole body, and vaginal orgasms are very intense and great but don't reach my whole body.

I'm not neurotypical and I wonder if maybe there is a neurological quirk with my pelvic nerve? Sad

Long term, I can't embrace anal sex either, can I? It's not good to have regularly from a stretching point of view?

What should I do? Could a sex therapist help somehow?

OP posts:
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KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 16/07/2016 14:20

Meh. You like what you like. Why be ashamed?

Your arse won't stretch. Plenty of peeps do poops bigger than the average cock.

Do what you enjoy and what makes you happy.

It's all groovy!

Brew

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Thisismyalias · 16/07/2016 14:29

Different strokes for different folks.

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PointlessUsername · 16/07/2016 14:31

Whatever floats your boat.

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Pinkheart5915 · 16/07/2016 14:32

You like what you like no need to feel embrassed

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booksandcoffee · 16/07/2016 14:34

Whatever turns you on.

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navygravy · 16/07/2016 14:35

A sex therapist might be able to address any underlying issues contributing to your negative emotional response after the sex.

We're all wired a bit differently and it's absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

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DawnMumsnet · 16/07/2016 14:48

Hi Unsure,

We're going to move this over to the Sex topic now if that's okay with you - we can see you've been on the site long enough.

We'll make sure the thread auto-deletes in time as that's what prompted you to post it in Chat in the first place.

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Unsureofmyneeds · 16/07/2016 14:55

Great that it autodeletes! Thank you.

OP posts:
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AnecdotalEvidence · 16/07/2016 23:35

I don't see the problem, definitely nothing to feel ashamed about, it sounds like you are enjoying sex - that's what matters.

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MarkRuffaloCrumble · 17/07/2016 00:19

DP and I both have certain things that we enjoy doing/talking about during sex that we're both mortified about afterwards! We have a strict "don't mention it" policy Grin

Try reading the Chimp Paradox for an insight into the different parts of your character and to understand why we have such internal conflicts. It's enlightening to realise how your base animal instincts can override your conscious human brain. Explains a lot!

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DioneTheDiabolist · 17/07/2016 00:40

OP, you are not alone. There is nothing wrong with you.Smile And as far as sex is concerned, you should be having a cracking time, not worrying that it's too good.Shock

You are right to be aware of the longterm risks. It's not really an everyday thing, it's an occasional treat.

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Eekaman · 18/07/2016 02:19

Another voice saying you are not alone... Mrs Eek says broadly similar things to you, on those occasions when PIV isn't doing it for her she takes charge and insists.

Have fun, enjoy, don't stress.

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pocketsaviour · 18/07/2016 17:08

There's nothing to be ashamed of. You will need to be more cautious physically as the anus isn't as elastic as the vagina, but this just means start slow, use lube, and stop immediately if you feel pain.

I'd recommend reading Tristan Taormino's Ultimage Guide to Anal Sex for Women.

I have a low cervix and prefer anal to PIV as it's more comfortable for me when done right. It sounds like you are in a LTR? But if doing anal with a new partner I always make sure I'm on top, so I'm in control of speed and depth.

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GinAndSonic · 18/07/2016 22:52

Would something like a small plug or analysis beads worn during piv work do you think? If you are worried about stretching etc it might be worth a try, so you will have some anal stimulation whilst having piv, and also, something small there might feel bigger / better with a penis providing some pressure through the vaginal wall? Or a well timed finger slipped in during oral maybe?

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farkoff · 19/07/2016 06:13

'Analysis beads'

GrinGrinGrin

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GinAndSonic · 19/07/2016 07:20

Bloody autocorrect Grin

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MephistophelesApprentice · 19/07/2016 07:27

Interesting that you link it to bring non-neurotypical. My partner has a similar condition and reacts a similar way.

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TheNaze73 · 20/07/2016 19:11

You two should do whatever floats your boat. As long as both people consent, I can't see anything wrong with doing & getting amongst anything that you both like

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