DD14 missing lessons, school doing nothing about it

[loobyloo1977]

My DD is in year 10. She was diagnosed with ADHD, dylexia and dyscalculia a couple of years ago. She's never been a fan of school but this year it has got a lot worse and she has started truanting from certain lessons. The reason for truanting is that she feels overwhelmed in the class as it so large with over 30 students (last year most of her classes were 10-15 students) and she doesn't understand the teacher as he talks so fast, also she doesn't have a close friend in the lesson with her which might sound silly but she is very reliant on her friends for support. She has missed over 6 weeks of history lessons now as she has truanted each time she has a lesson, sometimes she has been caught, most times not. If she is caught she gets a 40 minute detention with SLT which she would rather do than the actual lesson. Once she went in to another lesson for a subject she doesn't even study and pretended she was another student which I know she shouldn't have done but school didn't even realise, this was so she could be with a friend. Sometimes she goes to see her pastoral manager to talk to her but she just gets told to go away.

I have sent numerous emails to school but have not had a response. So today she missed yet another lesson and just sat outside on a bench in the yard. School would've had no idea she was there. I encourage her to just try the lesson but I really don't know what to do if she just won't go. Even if she goes back to the lesson she will really struggle to catch up as she has missed so much.

Please could someone give me some advice as I really don't know how to tackle this. Thank you

I think OP you need to accept that you’re going to have to be a great deal more proactive re your daughter

and as for her going in to another class that she’s not student of - that will be highly disruptive to other students OP. This is unfair

I feel for your daughter; also for the school and teacher as they don’t have enough resources.

Can you ask for a meeting? Email the Head of year or Head Teacher or Governors? To see if you can figure out something that works for both parties.

Do not email. Give them a call, go in person if needed. I know y they don’t have resources but you need to keep pushing for your daughter.

Does she has an EHCP? Unfortunately the UK education system doesn’t suit all the students; many fall through the net.

Are there other types of school you could send her too? The typical UK school won’t work for her unfortunately.

It will take awhile to get her an EHCP at this stage. I suggest you call the school every day until you get a response. If History is the only lesson she is missing she should move to another class with few kids hopefully.

Why would another class have few kids?
It's too late for her to pick up another GCSE, she'll have missed nearly a term.

The real world has many different jobs and lots of different people for each job.

No everyone is academic and pushing everyone through the same system is crazy; in particular for such an advanced country like the UK. Pretending all children can cope with 9 to 11 GCSE. Anyway this is for another thread but many kids are written off by this crazy system.

OP, you know your daughter best. I don’t think punishing her is the right answer. Listen to your daughter, support her. She is trusting in you to fight for her. Unless she is being naughty, rude I don’t think she needs punishment.

They need to be supporting her to attend, not punishing her for not attending. Are you in context with the SENCO?

Those saying get her an ehcp...by the time that gets processed she will have left school. Personally I would go into the school and ask what the procedure is for looking for her? Gently remind them if they don't know where she is then that's a safeguarding issue. Perhaps a member of staff could escort her there. Is the history teacher aware of her not understanding? If so what support can she have? Is there a possibility of moving groups with a different teacher or with a friend? Then I would look to reward her at home for attending and punishing (eg remove phone) when she doesn't go. I would also ask for the PowerPoints of what she's missed and try to get her looking at them at home...she won't want to go back now as she won't understand what's going on..

My school would have considered that a safeguarding issue and a search for her would take place ! Missing students is a concern ! Out of interest does she have a neurodiverse condition you are not aware of .? I’m my experience girls mask so well but tend to burn out in secondary school and it comes to light ?

This sounds weird.
when things sound weird there's something we don't know

why don't you change schools?

The friendship thing and other classes is shit.
She can cope there but not in other ones? Isn't that a coincidence?!

History GCSE is very hard, especially for someone with dyslexia, ADHD and dyscalculia. Your DD probably knows she has hardly any chance of passing in a class of 30 so she has written herself off.
I would try and contact pastoral and see if she can drop it. She clearly hates it. I would very much focus on passing her Maths and English GCSEs x 2 which will be hard enough as is. Perhaps she can go study in those lessons instead. Children’s behaviour tends to often be their way of communication.

Schools can't run it where they pick and mix otherwise every bloody kid would do it

This is what options are though.

The DC in question has SEND. The school are meant to comply with their legal obligations and apply “reasonable adjustments” for the DC in question.

The issue is state schools generally don't have sufficient space or staff to supervise students for the 5-6 hours a fortnight they'd otherwise be in the GCSE class. KS4 students don't have "free periods".

I'm a History Head of Department. Something's gone wrong. Email the History HOD and ask for a meeting. Take kiddo with you. They should have some catch up mechanism in place, even if it's just the Y11 revision materials.

No child should be this miserable. It's an MH issue that needs addressing. Their timetable should be modified. Parent is clearly supportive.

FYI, History GCSE is often 4 units. Chances are DC has missed one. It's recoverable.

OP, you might want to start a new thread on here about EHCPs, as well as looking into it yourself. There will be plenty of parents on here who know about how they work in practice and the best way go about it. Good luck.

Start from what you would like school to do about it and go from there. It sounds like they are already sanctioning the lesson truancy. Unless she changes subject she's unlikely to get a smaller class size, if History is so popular.
How does she respond to rewards? Both you and school could consider a reward (one from each) for every week she manages to attend all lessons.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/special_educational_needs/5484488-ehcp-support-thread-no-6?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share There is one already.

And you think the school is failing her? You are her parent and you should be the one pushing for support. Information about EHCPs is not hard to find online.

My daughter has a card to show when she's overwhelmed. She goes to her safe space in wellbeing
She's a good kid and only uses it when upset
The school needs to take action before this gets worse for your daughter.
Could she drop history? My dd is dropping in year 9. Taking less subjects and being happy is far better

School’s really can’t start rewarding pupils for attending lessons.
It’s a fairly normal expectation, regardless of whatever issues may be going on.