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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Year 7 - 2025 to 2026 - first time at BIG school

119 replies

Jellyjellyonaplate · 07/07/2025 22:14

Hi,

Anyone else got a year 6 soon to be year 7? I enjoyed reading some of the support thread for the current year 7s and thought it might be nice to make one for the coming year.

My DD is starting at a girls grammar where she knows no-one. It gets good results and I'm sure will be a much faster pace than her village primary that she is used to!

Hopefully she hangs in there and will make some friends. We've bought some uniform (ouch so expensive) and worked out the buses (we will have to give her a lift to the bus stop). Now researching a computer tablet which they need to have. It needs to be compatible with Teams, apparently android is which seems surprising.

Anyone else in the same boat?

Jelly

OP posts:
purpleme12 · 17/09/2025 17:05

My child says the corridors are too busy and there's lots of shoving and pushing (from year 10/11 maybe from what she says?)
She says some of the year 10/11 aren't very nice
She was shoved into a wall last week when they were trying to get by
And shoved against a wall again today she said.

drspouse · 18/09/2025 11:59

DD has been getting money from DH wallet and spending it, mainly on toys. We've read her the riot act and she decided to leave home. We also sent a message to the Y7 pastoral lead who called us straight back, bless her, it's common (I kind of knew this but it was reassuring) and we decided that part of learning to be responsible for her own and other people's things was to try and manage packed lunch requirements and not spend all our money on school lunches (she's very good at making her own lunch, but not good at not eating all the packed lunch contents on a Monday night).
She had a major meltdown and packed a backpack and went to sit in the garden while I had to go to a meeting at Scouts. Things have been getting to a head with her disorganisation (she finds it very hard to keep her things straight, but won't accept help) and we haven't even started with homework yet so we really need to get this sorted now rather than when things get busier.

purpleme12 · 18/09/2025 20:51

I Find it really stressful remembering everything for high school
There's more homework than I thought
I find the homework really stressful. Getting her to do it rather than doing anything else.
She finds homework really stressful and gets stressed out and worked up half the time

drspouse · 18/09/2025 20:52

DD hasn't had any homework yet - they are giving them a month's grace.

Darren2134 · 19/09/2025 14:52

purpleme12 · 18/09/2025 20:51

I Find it really stressful remembering everything for high school
There's more homework than I thought
I find the homework really stressful. Getting her to do it rather than doing anything else.
She finds homework really stressful and gets stressed out and worked up half the time

Edited

I can totally relate – Freddie’s had quite a bit of homework already too. I’m glad the Synergy app works well for keeping track, but I agree it’s definitely a big leap in ability at senior school. I feel lucky my eldest is quite bright, but I know I’ll probably find it much more stressful with my youngest as he’s not as academic. It’s such a big adjustment for them (and us as parents!).

Finteq · 19/09/2025 19:37

drspouse · 18/09/2025 20:52

DD hasn't had any homework yet - they are giving them a month's grace.

Mine hadn't had any homework.yet either

I ask her most days and she said she isn't sure.

So think they haven't had any yet.

She just always seems to not know about what's going on around her. So really wouldn't be surprised if she did have homework and just didn't know it.

Luckily we've got into a routine where she packs her own bag usually the night before. That's one less thing for me to do in the mornings.

My main concerns was her making friends. She seems happy enough so hopefully it is OK.

She doesn't have a huge friendship group but seems to have a couple of people she hangs out with .

Also luckily they posted the clubs on the Facebook account. So I've told her to go to a few.

She hadn't realised. Said they flashed up on a screen at school. But changed too fast so she couldn't read them.

drspouse · 19/09/2025 22:17

DD has already got one new friend's phone no - a boy who gets on the bus a stop after her and goes to the same place for music lessons. She was playing her flute to him over the phone today!

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 16:37

My child is getting really stressed about homework and screaming and getting really worked up

I don't know if I can do this for years

evtheria · 21/09/2025 16:47

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 16:37

My child is getting really stressed about homework and screaming and getting really worked up

I don't know if I can do this for years

Literally just came on MN to ask if anyone’s DC had issues with homework! My sympathies.

DS is acting like I’m the enemy/shouted that I’m “being mean” because I reminded him of homework due, and pointed out that he won’t be able to do it on X day because of clubs, etc… So I’ve told him I won’t say a word anymore about it, let’s see how the next few weeks pan out. He has an app that shows tasks set, though he barely checks it, and so far hasn’t written down reminders on a calendar without me instructing him to… It’s hard because I did really well at school but (or therefore?) my parents were never involved in my schoolwork, they’d not have a clue what homework I was set or what I was learning. I’m trying to be different and help him get a system in place, but arghhggghggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 17:38

This is bloody awful
She's so worried about getting a detention that she wants to do so she doesn't
But she's in such a state that she's screaming and writhing around on the floor and crying and it's been 45 minutes and she's only done one set of questions..

I don't know what to do
Or how to get through high school

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:09

An hour and 20 minutes doing Sparx science and there's still one set of questions to do

Lisamummy22girls · 21/09/2025 18:11

Year 7 homework is insane but it does get easier.. my eldest is in year 10 and obv now is getting more but in year 8 and 9 it was less then year 7.

my youngest in year 7 has loads but we are slowly getting though it

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 18:13

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 17:38

This is bloody awful
She's so worried about getting a detention that she wants to do so she doesn't
But she's in such a state that she's screaming and writhing around on the floor and crying and it's been 45 minutes and she's only done one set of questions..

I don't know what to do
Or how to get through high school

Does she have homework every night?
Personally I would get her into the routine of little and often ie 30 mins per night Mon-Fri is better than facing 2 hours on a weekend. But ultimately at this age it's up to them. Some kids can only learn by getting into trouble for not doing it.
Secondary is the transition to becoming more independent and autonomous so hard as it is you need to step away slightly.
Talk through the consequences of not doing it and then it's up to her.

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:18

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 18:13

Does she have homework every night?
Personally I would get her into the routine of little and often ie 30 mins per night Mon-Fri is better than facing 2 hours on a weekend. But ultimately at this age it's up to them. Some kids can only learn by getting into trouble for not doing it.
Secondary is the transition to becoming more independent and autonomous so hard as it is you need to step away slightly.
Talk through the consequences of not doing it and then it's up to her.

It really isn't that with her
She's aware of the consequences and she doesn't want the consequences which is why she is doing the homework
But homework has always been a trigger for her. She finds it very stressful and doesn't cope well.
We are getting into the habit of doing a bit each day. On Thursday for example she did the English bit.
The only thing we've tried to do today is the science homework. She's been on a trip all weekend so hasn't been able to do anything in between then.

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 18:21

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:18

It really isn't that with her
She's aware of the consequences and she doesn't want the consequences which is why she is doing the homework
But homework has always been a trigger for her. She finds it very stressful and doesn't cope well.
We are getting into the habit of doing a bit each day. On Thursday for example she did the English bit.
The only thing we've tried to do today is the science homework. She's been on a trip all weekend so hasn't been able to do anything in between then.

So she was tired and not in the right frame of mind then tonight?

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:25

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 18:21

So she was tired and not in the right frame of mind then tonight?

No that's not what I mean. Like I say, homework is one of her triggers.
She doesn't cope well and gets incredibly stressed.
and doesn't cope well with stress or worry

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:29

Lisamummy22girls · 21/09/2025 18:11

Year 7 homework is insane but it does get easier.. my eldest is in year 10 and obv now is getting more but in year 8 and 9 it was less then year 7.

my youngest in year 7 has loads but we are slowly getting though it

Why would they give more in year 7? I don't get that

Lisamummy22girls · 21/09/2025 18:32

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:29

Why would they give more in year 7? I don't get that

not sure my our school defo gives more in 7 then 8 and 9!

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:49

Disregulates and needs help

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 19:09

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:49

Disregulates and needs help

OK well then you need to get professional advice for strategies to help her.

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 19:20

That is easier said than done

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 19:24

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 19:20

That is easier said than done

I started engaging to give suggestions because you said you didnt know what to do and you've just batted them all away. Speak to SENCO at school or try and get other help, or don't.

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 19:32

twistyizzy · 21/09/2025 19:24

I started engaging to give suggestions because you said you didnt know what to do and you've just batted them all away. Speak to SENCO at school or try and get other help, or don't.

I have already spoken to school. But no help has been out in place.

I am also trying to get other help.

I don't think I've batted away any suggestions? You said a little every day and I said we're doing that because we are
You said speak to her about the consequences and then it's up to her and I've explained how that's not really the problem with her.

I don't think I've been rude

Monvelo · 21/09/2025 19:36

Sorry to hijack this thread but as a mum of a current yr6 we are looking at secondary schools next week, I just wondered if anyone had any tips on what to ask about that you wouldn't necessarily think of. Tia!

Darren2134 · 21/09/2025 19:49

purpleme12 · 21/09/2025 18:25

No that's not what I mean. Like I say, homework is one of her triggers.
She doesn't cope well and gets incredibly stressed.
and doesn't cope well with stress or worry

Edited

Has your daughter always displayed this behaviour when confronted with homework? . It sounds very stressful for yourself?

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