Year 11 - 2024/2025: It’s all downhill from here!

[QueenMabby]

New thread to help us get through the next week or so!

@INeverSeeYou my DS wants to do A level and not done it. His school do it but only around 10 out of 180 do it and he hasn’t. At his sixth form some will have done it, but I am told not to worry, they will need to work hard but with maths A level you would expect that anyway.

Open book even when it was allowed in recent years was always an unannotated copy. Given out by the invigilators. That's why it’s not a great idea – kids spend 10 mins trawling through R&J looking for a quote? better to have a few simple quotes quickly to hand (I defy you stars! Unsex me here) that you can talk about in a meaningful way.

It’s frustrating as they move the set texts on every two years so there’s never enough practice questions! Dd gets chat gpt to set her an exam paper based on the text - she tells it to set as a GCSE exam from her exam board and tells it how many questions and how many marks for each question. It then produces the paper. She writes down the answers and uploads a photo. It then marks it against the mark scheme it creates with the question paper. Has taken a bit of tweaking but it does work.

With regards to FM - our top set does it in the same time as the rest of the year do maths. They’d finished the maths syllabus by the end of yr 10 and this year has just been FM and revision.

ds didn’t do FM but he did do maths A Level and got an A. He did get a 9 at GCSE though and school set bridging work for the summer holiday. Not sure if everyone got that or just those that didn’t do FM. Guess we’ll find out this summer with dd!

@QueenMabbyyes my DD’s school did that, but some of the questions required really detailed knowledge about minor characters in the Aeneid which is not apparent from reading the text. Hopefully that’s just a quirk of AI and the real exam will be more accessible ( messalina was fine)
Fingers crossed 😬

Haven't been keeping up over half term but need this thread today.

DD has always been an academic child and has been working SO hard for the first part of the exams. She was clearly exhausted after the second week and after having the bank holiday off it's been a battle to ask her to do anything (not helped by me being at work during the week).

There's been a lot of stropping and tonight I've had "I'm just not motivated, I'd rather die than revise, I hate it, I hate school, I hate <certain teacher>" etc, plus a whole load of overthinking about other things related to school. Plus, in case you couldn't tell from the quote, so much DRAMA in all of it.

I've asked how she'd feel if her exams suck and she gets bad results knowing she could have done better, and would she rather feel like that forever or just for two more weeks while revising (using the drama right back at her), and of course she agrees with that.

But it's never that simple, we'll have the same conversation over and over again about this and I just cannot take this, equally I can't stand watching her just give up at the final stretch.

Advice and unmumsnetty hugs welcome 😔

@CocoPlum- they’re teenagers, stressed and not very rational at the moment. We just have to take it on the chin and keep going for a couple more weeks. and an unmumsnetty hug for you.

Thank you. I've just typed similar out to a friends group chat with more colourful language and having a little cry as I'm doing so. She's usually such great company and I've been telling everyone how "locked in" she's been and how well she's doing and I can't stand this passive giving up ... I didn't realise how stressed I was until I started typing.

This is absolutely a do as I say and not as I do suggestion because I struggle not to react to the teenage craziness with frustration. BUT if you are better at that than me I’d suggest taking the pressure off, and saying what a huge amount of work they have done up to now, and that they will do well no matter. And then say if there is anything you could do to help if they did want to do any more, to say (my child won’t take ANY help from me 😔). It sounds like your DD feels totally overwhelmed and is terrified they aren’t going to do as well as they want. I would reassure them they have done great and they can feel proud, and if they need to do a little less now that is okay. If the guilt and fear are reduced your DD might get back to it.

Also sending unmumsnet-hugs. It is horrible not being able to help our teenagers 😔

@CocoPlum
My (limited) advice, which would probably be the most effective for ours would go something like
“Look sweetheart it’s content 100% exam heavy and most people think it isn’t a great set up but it’s the system you year 11s are in right now”
(so they didn’t feel alone)
“there are hundreds on thousands of 16 year olds revising subjects they are perhaps not quite as enthusiastic about as they once were all across the country, actually all over the world”.
“it’s two more weeks, 14 days, then you have a summer of fun ahead - for 3 months you won’t have to do much you don’t want to”
”so how can I help? What study snacks/drinks do you want? And screw “mr least favourite teacher” these aren’t his/her exams they will never see your answers so they really are irrelevant if it helps yeah they were a bit of a knob at times and yes the “dates for geography cases are a little inconsistent so should we make a mind map to try and organise them better” (insert subject topic applicable)”

Basically acknowledge what she has expressed

And I would do this in the morning with a peace making cup of tea/coffee/Diet Coke/toast and jam/bowl of strawberries and yogurt

My ratty teen is a nightmare 20 minutes after waking but once he gets going (in the morning) is generally ok-ish, then tapers off early evening. There would be little point talking to him about revision this late,

Thanks @phyllidafosset , I know you're right and I have been fairly laid back till now but I'm tired tonight and it's been days of this. I also know from bitter experience how it feels to know I didn't put the effort in and feeling forever bad about it. Today I'm frustrated with all the drama and over thinking. There's been some other stuff going on in school which she's upset about too so that's adding to it.

@CocoPlum - excluding the most obvious first, is it definitely not the hormonal and anxious time of the month? Sometimes also double whammy both mum and teen?

I am having a similar day today.

He did a practice paper for history this morning that went well. Was pretty chirpy!

He was struggling with coming up with possible questions on his second history topic so thought we’d move over to biology as he’s still doing practice questions on the last topic as revision, he hasn’t quite finished the content for p2 yet. For some reason he’s really struggling and it’s a massive mental block.

He did some, but was loosing motivation. The staring into space started becomibg the default. He was getting frustrated and stroppy. Saying he didn’t want to do it.

I tried to change the mood by suggesting he do a practice geog paper2 instead. More staring into space and complaining. He just lost his motivation completely.

i don’t think we really achieved much at all. He packed it in by 330 and said he’d had enough and stomped off upstairs.

Speaking to him this evening he’s said he’s really annoyed that other people have managed to have nice half terms doing ‘fun things’ and he’s just worked. He said he’s fed up and had enough.

He did say he’s not angry with me, he knows I am TRYING to help, he’s just angry at exams.

i really feel for him. I completely understand why he’s fed up. There’s so much to cover. Unfortunately for him, he didn’t work as hard as he should, only really starting to revise hard (and he really has worked hard), since Easter. But it means his mocks (November) were 4/5/6 level and he really wants 7/8, so he’s having to put a lot in now.

Roll on 17th June!

Haha actually ... not me (I'm just finishing a 2 week long period, yay perimenopause!), but yes, actually I think she might be a little premenstrual as her last period started the day before the first exam ... so she's not fully PMS like but yeah now you mention it ...

@CocoPlum - I think stress can make the PMT anxiety much worse and more prolonged. She sounds like she has done loads of work and is a high achiever so as long as she keeps on top of her revision notes now, she will most likely be fine. Huge amounts of last minute revision is most relevant for those who have not studied constantly in the past and for mocks. She probably has it all banked. If you think of it as hours in the bank, sounds to me like she has them. So just a little top up is required.

Yes, DD said it was harder than women (her paper one and she did the Homeric World for this paper) and sounds like her essay questions weren't lovely. Think it has snapped her out of her half term lull and she is now very upset about having to carry on after half term and hating the fact they had the break when I think she switched off a bit. She is autistic and I anticipated this meltdown would happen at some point after half term. Have no idea why they have to go on for so long (have just found this thread and am sure this has been endlessley debated already).

This is all good advice that I definitely needed reminding of, as well as the reminder that it isn't just me and her going through this. My friends are mostly not at this stage yet, and the couple that are have children who are struggling to even make it in due to ND.

@greymalkin71 sympathise indeed with your DD and anyone else on the thread who is struggling with illness, ND or anything else that makes these exams even harder.

I am not sure how much more spread out the exams are – DD in 2017 had a similar number (extra papers for triple) and started on about 10 May; her last exam was 21 June (day after her birthday). DS2 in 2019 had a not dissimilar schedule tho he finished on about 15/16 June.

But I think boards now spread out some subjects a bit more esp maths and English as in Covid times there were concerns about students missing a whole subject if they were ill and off for 3-4 days. So now there is a bit more staggering. Also if the exams were across a shorter period, there would be a lot more clashes – some DC on this thread have a very busy week 1 or 2, others have their exams later. You really don't want GCSE clashes.

Also I suspect the boards avoid having subjects that everyone does on the same day too much – so with Eng lit and lang, maths and sciences, the exams on the same day tend to be option subjects like MFL, CS, RE, media; so avoiding hideously heavy days of doom with double must-pass exams. No one would thank you for biology in the am and maths in the pm, or Eng lang am and chemistry pm. But that in itself spreads them out even more.

@CocoPlum you are not alone 💐I posted the other day about having a showdown with DC about them just stopping all work /effort. I think it really takes you by surprise when they’ve been a model student in the past. In a way I was a bit smug that they would do well (not having to worry about them passing which is obviously a huge struggle/effort for some children) and now I am the one envying friends whose children are ‘in the zone’.

After the row I did end up having a laugh with DC the day after about it all. I mean of course the exams are inportant but they are not the be all and end all. That said I’m still irritating DC by sending them links and videos in the hope they might do them. I am way more invested and bothered for their GCSEs than I was about my own! Be frustrated inside but blame the system not the child.

@CocoPlum tired and frustrated is so totally understandable. My friend always says the the sign of a secure teenager is that they allow themselves to let out their stress, negative emotion and frustration at home on parents. But it doesn’t make it easy. It is just so hard and it can be so painful when the onslaught is directed at you.

If it’s not a standard offering where he’s going for sixth form I agree he’ll be fine. There won’t be any assumptions. DD was the only student in her cohort of A level maths students who didn’t do GCSE FM. She said it absolutely made a difference initially - she still got an A so caught up eventually.

Everyone has said it better than I could @CocoPlum but sending hugs too!

TMI but DD just realised her last period was before Easter...I imagine exam stress means girls' cycles are up the creek.

There's probably a research paper about it...

I agree pretty much with what @clary says there is very much more exams shorter time and less coursework

and there are a lot more exam subjects than you would think and clashes are awful - when I did exams there was a triple clash so they did English Lit in the morning then German Listening, Media Studies and Sociology it was a lot!

Then it needs to end with the 2 month marking turnaround.

I agree with half term actually it does take momentum away but not sure what you can do -

At DD2's school they offer Stats GCSE to students in the top set, and those who are likely to pass Maths, but may struggle to get all the "passes" they need for A Levels. It seems they think these students will be in with a shot of getting an extra grade 4 (or above) from the Stats paper, so it's worth a shot.

I think only around 50 or so of them were entered, but more were offered and it was up to the student themselves to decide whether they wanted to do it or not. They didn't get any Stats teaching, they were told they would know most of it already from Maths, but DD2 has been working her way through the syllabus on her own and would beg to differ!

It really does seem (in this school's case, at least) that they are just hoping for some extra "passes", rather than looking for top grades.

If it's any consolation to your DS, my DD2 went to the beach with a big group of friends after school on the Friday before half term, but other than going to her Saturday job, and regular walks round the block to get some fresh air, she didn't do anything other than revise for the full half term week, so not everyone was having fun (and I certainly wasn't - the flashcard fatigue is real)!