Year 11 - 2024/2025: It’s all downhill from here!

[QueenMabby]

New thread to help us get through the next week or so!

Thanks @QueenMabby!

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thanks for the new thread! DS is finding it tricky keeping momentum this week. I encouraged more of a break, but he’s done something most days apart from Saturday. I think he’d have been better having a couple of days or half days entirely off, rather than making three hours of work stretch over a whole day, but obviously I know nothing!

Interesting to reflect on how hands on/off we and our own parents are/were. My parents helped me enormously as I was at a rubbish comp where the maths and science teaching in particular was dreadful. I was lucky that my parents had degrees in relevant areas and could basically re teach me the content in the evenings but it was a time consuming and stressful approach for all concerned.

DS is at a much better school, still a state comp but much better in every way, so my involvement has been more light touch - checking that a schedule has been created and us being followed, facilitating exercise and trips for cake etc.

My mum still thinks that I’m “fussing” by doing this, so she’s clearly blocked out the horror that was my own gcse time!

Good luck to all revisers and parents today!

My parents were completely hands off. I do not think they even really knew what school year we were all in, at times. Even university entrance and course, hardly a discussion on the matter.
I have done the 11 plus 4 times now! But after that, my involvement has not been much, more on the social and emotional side and organising hobbies. And pep talks and lots of nice food and tea.
My older 2 did not want or need any help. I am not sure about DD taking GCSEs this year. She has no idea how some of the exams went and she is panicking again about History and her AdMaths exam right at the end. I just keep telling her less than 3 weeks to go and then a lovely summer of socialising.

However, we both know the Sixth Form taster events plus work experience etc is also looming. It is the age where you have to take breaks mentally when you can, because there is always the next step from here. It is proper adulting stuff now. Year 12 mocks are just as important really. The hard stuff is making the choices around exact A levels, different school/Sixth Form, uni courses/apprenticeships etc. Unfortunately the GCSE exams are just the start of this tedious long process - maybe that is why it is so stressful.

Thank you!

Parents hands-off for my 'O levels' too, it was up to me. I remember copying and trying to remember chunks of text word for word. So, before flash cards or memory aids were a thing. This is why I think I have bought revision aids, encouraged youtube videos and printed off past papers as much as I can as a way to heal the past. 😀

Bought a cinnamon bun for DS this morning from a nice bakery to start the day off on a positive note but still not started moving from the table. Will go in in a sec and give a gentle nudge. I think he would welcome that.

Thank you for the shiny new thread.

I 'think' DS has spent the last hour on Q4s for English, I keep popping in to see if he needs any help but he is 'fiiiiiine'.

I am off tomorrow so it is a fun day of History. His four subjects are:

Inter war years 1918-1939
Expansion of America 19th century
Health and the People
Normans

First two are done, second two are next week.

That German school looks brilliant. DS plans to continue Spanish and I would love to find something like this for him, if you have seen anything. He did a summer camp a few years back but the language element was limited as everyone (Russian , Polish etc) reverted to English. IB schools round here and a couple of comps manage exchanges but most don't. Numbers at A level for MFL are woeful across all schools. DS has a priority offer on account of wanting to do Spanish, its that bad

I have just spent a chunk on retail therapy!
New trainers, trousers, summer hoodies and a pile of books "that are for after the exams"

I am expecting big work this afternoon, as agreed, for all this!

Yes I am resorting to bribery. :-)

@Araminta1003 looks great ! Yes the MFL numbers are woeful - I encouraged DS to take a language - he was given Spanish and he's accomplished a lot probably on his ability and some encouragement from me - ( I could only teach up to Yr7 beginners rotation before they chose with a heavily planned lesson from the native specialist !) I'm a Germanist with French. He's given it a good go - DS2 is a bit more switched on- he opting for French

4th time with them here. I’ve been relatively hands off with all of them. Daughter 1 was a v hard worker, self disciplined and just got on with it, got a great mix of As & Bs. Daughter 2 insanely smart and just retained everything as she went along, resulting in A* across the board. Son struggled academically but achieved a mix of Bs & Cs (apart from maths which took him 4 attempts…!), he did get himself a first in History though, so totally got there in the end and when it was his time.

And now Daughter 3; severely dyslexic and dyspraxic, with, I suspect, ADD. She has her own way of working and the only input she asks for is occasional maths help and the endless printing of past papers.

I figure that I’m not going to be there to hold her hand through A Levels (subjects that I’m not versed in), or university and that she needed to find the best way for her without me breathing down her neck. As it turns out, she’s been pretty regimented and well planned with her revision. She’s absolutely not going to get the top grades like her older sister did, but she is doing HER best, and that’s all I ask of her. She’s actually super excited for A levels; doing subjects that she is both passionate about and interested in learning more about.

DD gone to school for maths revision. Think the teacher bribes them with sweets. Not sure if that will be her done for the day.
DS (alevels) is doing 3 hours then choosing uni accommodation after.
I’ve gone for a pedicure.
Actually dreading the end. My kids are very social so not sure how much I’ll see them come 19th June. Enjoying not worrying where they are or being taxi and that they are happy to watch TV with us as an end of day revision thing. DD has also gained a boyfriend, been very good during the run up to the exams but am sure they’ll want to spend a lot of time together after.

Thanks for the new thread @QueenMabby !

@Araminta1003
It is the age where you have to take breaks mentally when you can, because there is always the next step from here. It is proper adulting stuff now. Year 12 mocks are just as important really. The hard stuff is making the choices around exact A levels, different school/Sixth Form, uni courses/apprenticeships etc. Unfortunately the GCSE exams are just the start of this tedious long process - maybe that is why it is so stressful.

This is a what worries me.
DD thinks it's all downhill from here. She's 16!

She says she doesn't know what she'll do if working life is as dull, awful amd exhausting as school has been 🙁.

I've no idea what we're doing to our children, but if that's them at 15/16 something has gone terribly wrong somewhere, hasn't it?

My reference to “downhill” was more we’re over worst and now heading towards the home stretch rather than - it’s all going to get worse! 🤣

@QueenMabby , I know! 😂

I must admit, I didn't even notice the title of the thread, but DD would agree with it - if not with the sentiment. One for English Lang! 😉

I think they get a bit more freedom in Sixth Form and that is enough to keep many of them happy. I mean like more choice over leaving the school campus, around uniform, lots of free periods and exercising a choice over subjects and their own working time. Then obviously they get even more freedom at university, if they go. GCSEs is the height of control over them in many ways. It is more of a question of whether they are ready at the right stages for the extra bit of slow release of freedom, that our society allows them.
Making the right kind of choices over their time and freedom is hard for some though. Others really fly with it.

It is a cliche, but GCSEs are a marathon and not a race and perfectly normal to get a bit fed up and exhausted right now. But we need to keep telling them it is worth it to push through. That is why DD and I are still counting down the days until freedom day on June 17th for us.

I take the view with DS when he complains how boring it is - I agree and point out that education is a privilege and can open doors that 99 percent of the rest of the planet can only dream of. Or he can if he wants try a trade if studying is not for him but I pointed out at entry level he might earn some good honest money at the beginning but the kind of lifestyle he aspires to is not to be found on bricklaying / roofer wages in the long run with a family in his 30's and possibly being fed up of working in all weathers, with back problems, and the smarter guys end up running their own businesses or upskilling. A friend has a son who bombed at GCSE because he lost the other parent sadly in yr 10 . He was quite happy at first earning big money as a builders mate when his like minded friends went off to sixth form but were still around in our small rural town. Three years later he's fed up as everyone has gone off to uni, headed abroad having adventures or moved elsewhere to pursue degree apprenticeships . He's now gone back to what my mother would quaintly call "night school" So at the risk of sounding like my mother at the dinner table when I turned up my nose at the food " there's starving kids in Ethiopia.. " is the line I push with DS. I think he gets it as he has a saturday job pot washing job at a local pub and was a bit snotty about one of his coworkers who was in his 20's doing the same and a bit of a loser ( his words) but I do point out at least he was working and you didn't know how he came to end up there. I'm the child of the post war generation who believed if you worked hard, you would get somewhere and have a nice standard of living . By and large ( ignoring house prices ) I think in the western world that definitely holds true

DD's done 4 hours at school today. 2 hours English 7+ and 2 hours chemistry triple (DS only attended the English). I can't believe all the extra support school are giving. DD really needs that to stay on top of revision; it's been like pulling teeth this week.

On another note, trying to sort a prom dress this half term. We got one on Vinted which juuust fit, but DD gone from a B to a D cup in 5 months 😱 so now trying to find something else not too pricey and sell the other one.

Trade wages are pretty good! Many a family can exist on a trade wage (us included!). Less people are doing trades and so they are pretty in demand meaning they can charge well! We need more tradespeople!

@Pinkflower100I don’t disagree - our good friend who started as hod carrier with no qualifications 15 years ago earns 10 times my NHS consultant salary as a contractor

Yes I can imagine! A lot of people seem to look down on trades and it does annoy me to be honest. It’s seen as the career for those who aren’t academic only, when actually some people are pretty academic but want a career doing something practical.

Our 16 year old can’t wait for A’levels because he is whittling down to the subjects he likes best.

@Pinkflower100 no I don't disagree in the slightest - I told DS there is a demand for tradespeople if that's what he wanted to do - I'm not the least bit sniffy about it but its no less hard work I'm sure you'll agree. He knows running a business is hard - DH is working 24/7 His head is in the clouds atm I think the ( unrealistic) lifestyle he aspires to is not found on tradespeople wages so he dismissed that when we looked round the FE college which is his plan B looking at engineering if he doesn't go down the A-level route . I think the point I'm trying to make is there is no easy route to making a living whether academic or practical

Trades can pay very well. My brother who is an electrician is better off than the Oxbridge grads in the family. I’m sure I saw an article about trades out performing many professional jobs now. Maybe try a different example pp 🤣🤣