Moving school in Year 10

[winterrabbit]

DS was at a private school from year 7 and moved in year 10 (just this September past) to another private school that had a small entry point in year 10. The results at this new school are a lot better (65% grades 7-9 as opposed to 43% at his old school) and facilities much much better. We decided to apply very late in year 10 as not overly happy with the old school as there was some disruption in classes, results not great for a private school and virtually no facilities, however, DS was happy there. DS got offered a place, did a taster day and we decided to move him although we were both a little unsure at the time but the school only gave us a week to decide so we took a chance. DS started at the beginning of September but he really doesn't like it and wants to go back to his old school. The school day at his new school is really long and he says the lessons are very strict and boring, plus, although he has made some friends, he says they are not his type of people (all very posh and nerdy (his words), plus the school day is very long and the journey there is a lot longer and more difficult so he's exhausted. Even though the facilities are great, you are forced to do the school sports and he isn't into rugby at all and has a lot of existing sports commitments outside of school. I told DS to give it until half term to settle but he is still saying he wants to go back to his old school. Old school still has a place for him and says they would love to have him back. I feel in my heart, although new school is better on paper and the organisation and communication is excellent, I can't bear for him to be unhappy and should let him return to his old school. However, new school has said we will need to pay for next term as well as 1 term's notice is required. We already paid for this term and old and new school which has nearly bankrupt me and I really don't want to go it again although would think about it if it meant DS being happy. WWYD??

Still haven't been able to make a decision. I have been talking to the HT of his old school about him returning and have been reminded of the reasons I moved him. Most key for me is that DS will not be able to go back into top set maths as his space has gone so he will be going into the 3rd set where, apparently, the teacher is not good. DS had her once and said he didn't learn a thing. Seems a minor thing but DS's maths is strong and I really wanted him to go back into his old set otherwise he won't be challenged. I am still on the parents' whatsapp and it seems the issues with comms (or lack of them) are still present. So, I am re-thinking slightly as I am thinking the new school is probably better overall, however, I don't think I will be able to persuade DS. Old school says the earliest he can return is 11th Nov so he'll have to go back to new school for a week. I am hoping that he finds he likes it a bit more and can be persuaded to stay. The HT at his old school thinks there won't be a huge amount of catch-up as the new school is pretty academic so we don't need to rush the decision but I am nervous of the differences in curriculum so don't want to leave it too long.

Tell your DS he will be going to 3rd set maths and the GCSEs teaching may be an issue. So he needs to give it a go for 5 terms, get a great holiday of his dream or car driving lessons as someone else suggested. A levels, he can move to another school.
If he moves back, the double cost is going to mean no car driving, no holiday.
Ask him to do the pros and cons himself.
Do you think this issue of not liking the new school is the academic focus plus Year 10 expectations is more than he thought? Maybe in new school, 3rd set still gets 7-9 grades.
Is it a case of asking no rugby due to other sport commitments? We know swimmers and footballers who train a lot and school sport is not on their timetable due to their outside school training. Though they had to show the amount of outside school training to the sport department.

The maths thing would make the decision easy for me.

Our DS is a very strong mathematician and would have been so demoralised being in set 3 with a teacher that he’d had a previous poor experience of. I’m very sure that it would have negatively affected his work in other subjects too

Keep him in the academically stronger school, save a lot of money in the second set of fees and plan together what that might be spent on. Driving lessons are a good carrot to dangle. He was up for the move, remind him of that and be strong and confident about your decision. He’ll finish school per se in May 2026, just exams to do after that, which isn’t actually that far off. GCSE years fly by.

The old headteacher will promise the world - they want your money.

Remember all the reasons you had for moving, they are still there.

If he was really upset that would be different but it sounds move that he is dissatisfied and unsettle. He could be used to being at the top and his self perception has had a knock now he isn’t among others of similar ability

Dangle a carrot and explain the costs. Plus rugby is only for another weeks.

No I would never move a child in year 10.

It's too late.

He has done half a term's work. Even if the 2 schools are doing the same board, they will not cover the topics in the same order. And even if they're doing the same board they might have chosen different texts and options.

He would have a half a term's work to catch up on in every subject.

It's just not feasible.

Have told him and he says he doesn't care, he still wants to move back to the old school so this says a lot about his strength of feeling. He says he can't face staying at the new school for another 1 3/4 years. He says all the teachers at his new school seem to hate him and are really grumpy, constantly tell him off. I don't get the impression he is feeling pressurised academically, just that the teaching style is more strict and less interactive. In my view good relationships with your teachers is essential to doing well.

Sorry but I disagree with that. My older son moved school in March of Year 10, having missed about 3 months of school in total (due to a permanent exclusion) and he caught up by the time he sat his GCSEs and got a decent set of results, would've been even better if he'd done more revision. They go over content more than once you know. This is not a reason not to move.

It's nothing to do with his confidence taking a knock at his new school. They don't have sets at his new school which is why he isn't in the top set. I know he isn't really distressed but he actively doesn't like it there so I am trying to balance this with all the positives of the new school, of which there are many. Unfortunately his view on the school and the impact on his effort and wellbeing is absolutely key.

Does set 3 in maths at his old school definitely study the higher tier course? At DS school they sit the intermediate tier maths course where the maximum grade is a B.

That’s not an option in England where I infer the Op is (maybe incorrectly tbf). It’s higher (grades 3-9) or foundation (grades 1-5).

Of course they do. It's a private school so I think all do apart from maybe set 5? Isn't that the same in state schools?

Not in my world!

Perhaps as yours is a selective school they’re all up to sitting the higher tier course.

My dc went to a 9 form entry, non selective Welsh medium state school where they catered to all abilities so not all of them sat the top or even intermediate tier papers.

Many state schools have a lot more than 5 sets. The one I worked in had perhaps 10-11 in a year for maths (very small groups for lowest sets). Because there are only two tiers in England, perhaps more students sit higher? I think the bottom 2-3 or maybe 4 sets would have sat foundation. Perhaps in some sets there would be a mixture (I have taught groups (MFL) where some sat H and some F)

Hi all, just coming back to update. We were trying to make a decision by this week latest but still really undecided. New school are doing what they can to help him settle but he still dislikes the "boring" lessons, strict teachers and longer day. He has made friends but says he prefers his friends and his old school and wants to go back. His old school can take him but he will be in set 3 for Maths and many of the issues I was unhappy about are still there although disruption in lessons has apparently reduced and kids are more focused. Such a horribly difficult decision. If he was happy there then no way would I move him but I can't bear the thought of him being unhappy.

Who is telling you disruption has reduced and the students are more focused?

I honestly think you’ve left it too long now. It was pushing it before half term, but another week has now gone by. They really do crack on with covering the curriculum at this time of year and there’s no way that both schools have chosen the same texts and are covering the work for all subjects in the same order and at the same pace.

He needs to stay put and make the most of the opportunities that he’s got at the new school.

Parents with kids at the school and I know they excluded of the kids who was causing a lot of trouble.

I know a decision needs to be made soon but a week before or after half term is neither here nor there. New school is more academic than the old school so I think they're covering a lot and any missed learning can be addressed later. They go over topics several times even before they go on revision leave.

In my subject (one of the sciences) we don’t have time to go over the topic before the exam - they are taught once. At the end of the course we go over common themes, required practicals, exam technique. I think this is the same for most subjects, they are all so content heavy.

They go over topics several times even before they go on revision leave.

Is this at the school he is at now tho @winterrabbit – the one with the longer days, more academic outlook and better-behaved students? Bc if so and you move him, that won’t be something he benefits from – when he may need it?

I’m with @OhBeAFineGuyKissMe – in my subject (MFL) I would typically still be covering content in the spring term of year 11 and would not have time to revisit topics covered in September/October of year 10. And that’s quite a skills-based subject; something really topic-based like history or Eng lit could be even more of an issue, as PPs have said.

It feels to me as tho you want to move him and somehow want the collective expertise of MN sec ed to support you in that. I don’t think that’s going to happen tho. Some posters have said move him, some have felt it would be unwise. I’m in the latter camp myself. New school is harder, stricter, longer days – all of which may well lead to better GCSE grades. And there’s the money aspect. And the maths set aspect you mentioned.

But yunno, it’s not my decision and it makes no odds to me personally if you move him back. You (and he) need to make the decision and be happy with it.

To be honest, I would prefer that he stays at the new school as the reasons I moved him are still valid. The question now is, do these factors/positives outweigh DS's wishes and happiness?

Just wanted to come back here and update. DS is still at the new school and still unhappy. He seems to be doing ok academically but hates the longer days, travel, strictness and that it's "boring." He also doesn't like the people and says they are "nerdy". I would have moved him back to his old school after the October half term but his old school said that they no longer had a place available for him so the decision was made for us. So, I have a pretty unhappy child and trying to work out what to do. He wants to leave to go to one of our local state schools but I really don't want him to move to an entirely new school at this stage in year 10 so he is just going to have to get on with it. And yes, I feel like the worst parent ever.

You not the worse parent ever, I think the nerdy and strictness aspect is very telling. DC may be expected to put effort in and nerdy means there are students studying and not thinking they can sail through exams with bare minimum. Strictness in what sense? Giving homework on time, getting to class room on time? Move him for A levels in state school, he now has 5 terms until GCSEs. Have you talked to current teachers in the school? What are their views?

Agree. I would move him back. No matter how good the school is if he is unhappy he won’t get the results; he may get anxious and stressed and this is not going to help

That’s a shame; so you didn’t take the place when it was available?