Guilt of moving schools

[Whatsernom]

We are currently at a ok to good private girls school but with the new Labor government meaning VAT on school fees we can't really afford to keep sending our 13 year old there anymore. Especially as we have an 11 year old who will be going into Year 8 in Sep 2025. This is too much of a financial burden despite the fact that both me and mu husband earn 100k each. We have one school near us (Gordon's in West End) which we did not get into. They are oversubscribed every year and despite living in the area for 10 years newbies have moved into the new developments nearby which ousted us out. I am so torn with moving her. The only choice we now have is Collingwood. I keep hearing mixed things about this school - mainly negative. I feel awful and wish we had thought all this through before. Perhaps moving closer to Gordons or just to a completely different area. Anyone in and around the West End/ Bisley area who can offer advice and some words of wisdom. A huge part of me feels like a failure for not having thought this through.

She will be fine in a state school. If she is bright she would do well anywhere. If she is struggling she will get more support in state

We are in a similar situation and also feeling awful. We will keep ours in their private schools until natural exit points and in the meantime we will try to move into the catchments of the best state schools locally.

My children went to Collingwood and I taught there for a while. It’s a very large school, so would your girls be ok with that? I wouldn’t aim for Gordons, even if you could get a place. Have you considered Winston Churchill or Woking High. You’d probably need to be in Camberley/Frimley for Tomlinscote

Are there any places at Charters? Suspect it will be full but if you're applying mid-year and can get there, I'd take that over Collingwood.

Is your daughter at a day school at the moment or one with some boarding? There's a big fee difference between, say,

Lord Wandsworth's and Farnborough Hill. Could a sideways move work if you're at a more expensive school? Appreciate it won't if you're already at a more reasonably-priced independent school.

Is it worth moving? Or is that more expensive/too much hassle?

Or is a cheaper house an option, I’m presuming a lot of your 200k income is eaten up by mortgage costs.

do you have some sort of unbelievably huge mortgage? otherwise I cannot imagine why you wouldn't afford two kids in private schools

It’s still a tough age to move schools and leave all
your friends, even if there is no choice

Move to a cheaper house?

I am staggered that on a joint net income over £10,000 per month you can't afford a 20% increase in your school fees.

Would they both be moving?

If you’re looking for in-year admissions then don’t worry about catchment unless there is a waiting list. If there’s a waiting list you could ask where about’s you’d be on it with your current address.
Go and look round Collingwood, yes it’s big but certainly used to have lots going on - there are advantages to big.
Then look at where you’d be prepared to travel to and contact schools/admissions at the councils as round there you’re by Hants, Surrey and Bracknell Forest and find out what the waiting lists are like but be open minded, it takes a long time to change the reputation of a school and it’s often worth going to see for yourself.
You’ve got Sandhurst and Frogmore which are worth considering as well as Tomlinscote and some of the Woking schools. Long shots would be Charters and/or Ranelagh however I think you’d be lucky to get one place there and two would be like winning the lottery, but it is worth asking. I have a feeling Bohunt have also taken over one of the Farnborough schools - that may also be worth looking at.

Can you really not fathom that their school fees could be half of the £10k a month, they potentially have a large mortgage because they are in the south east and food prices and utilities are insane generally. An extra £1000 is a lot of money to find.

Children if our serving soldiers move schools frequently so that their parents can serve our country. Some have attended four schools by the time they are 11.

There is some useful advice here regarding transition to another school. Much of it applies to any child moving. https://forceschildrenseducation.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/20180515-MovingSchoolsGuidev4-O.pdf

They can move to a less elaborate house with smaller mortgage @NeverHadHaveHas

As for food and bills, people manage it with 5x less

Can you really not fathom that their school fees could be half of the £10k a month, they potentially have a large mortgage because they are in the south east and food prices and utilities are insane generally. An extra £1000 is a lot of money to find.

I think it would be unusual to have a very large mortgage & commit to 2 sets of high fees without any contingency or investments before the VAT increase. If it is a large mortgage that’s an issue there is the option of moving at least.

Fees increase 5% plus annually

Don't feel guilty, there are 1000s of parents having to do the same as yourself at the moment. If Labour had stuck to the Sept 25 introduction it would have given people time but instead they pulled it forwards to Jan 25 and that has created a situation of parents scrabbling around for state places over the summer.

So far looking like the % leaving will be, as some of us predicted, around 8-10% at which point the policy brings in pretty much £0-0.5million net. If the % leaving goes above 10% then the policy will cost the state. So all this stress and worry for practically no gain!

@twistyizzy This policy was never really about money. It’s red meat for the Labour base who dislike private education and dislike people with money. It’s clearly not about children!

Gordon’s has such a tiny catchment please don’t feel guilty.

It’s not a disadvantage to be at state school, it’s just normal, like the vast majority of children in this country. Please don’t worry OP and welcome to the real world.

OP hasn't disclosed how much her fees are but I must admit I can't fathom how one would choose to spend, as you are suggesting, £50,000 on a school which is only described as "ok".

It's not about being 'ok in a state school like all other children' it's about being moved away from all your friends to a school potentially miles away from home with little to no notice.

Why some posters can't understand that is beyond me.

It's really strikes me that when people post about appeals advice for state schools etc everyone wades in with support.

Someone dares to post and say they feel terrible for moving their child from private school and they get sarcastic comments.