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Is Westminster School the best school on Earth? STATESMOM returns

1000 replies

statesmom · 27/06/2024 22:23

I have a lot to say, don't know if anyone remembers the thread. Let me know if you want to hear from me.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
26
TizerorFizz · 18/07/2024 12:20

Here you are.

Definitely a fishing trip thread. Just with added bile to raise hackles for some reason,

Is Westminster School the best school on Earth?  STATESMOM returns
DDberzatto · 18/07/2024 12:41

Araminta1003 · 18/07/2024 12:08

Or the OP is just doing hypotheticao research for a book or article. Which is what I kind of suspected from the beginning.
The global elite class is a new phenomenon and makes for some good fiction.

Whilst I agree that the OP has spun us an unlikely tale, I have concerns that she is trying to post as if she is an actual parent from the School in some attempt to settle a score/besmirch another Mother whose child actually did attend the School....

Araminta1003 · 18/07/2024 13:06

If you have suspicions @DDberzatto report the thread to MN.

Some of it may also sound like the ramblings of an 18 year old taking the mickey out of overinvested moms. Also perfectly plausible because this age group may have mothers on MN since birth pretty much. So that is also possible…

WearyAuldWumman · 18/07/2024 15:09

Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 06:34

@DDberzatto Very interesting couple of posts!
I wonder how that will be defended? Maybe he skipped a few years? 🤷‍♀️

She’ll claim to have two sons.

DDberzatto · 18/07/2024 15:36

WearyAuldWumman · 18/07/2024 15:09

She’ll claim to have two sons.

Indeed….Having referred to only one child on all of the threads she has participated in.

And also claims to be a Lawyer in the first thread.

statesmom · 18/07/2024 15:44

Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 03:56

And you paid how much for this??
Also what’s going to happen when he has to apply for work after university- will you have someone coaching him and holding his hand for that?
At what point is he going to learn self reliance and, more importantly, dealing with failure? How we cope with the curveballs in life is what builds resilience. So far it looks like you’ve shielded and protected from every negative eventuality by paid handholding.
At what point will he be allowed to make his own decisions? You keep referring to “we” in your reply which is interesting. Surely it’s “he”?

This is such a lazy argument.

Guess what lady? At one point I wiped his butt. Literally. I no longer do that.

He is totally on his own, happy, and ready for the world, what good and ill it brings him.

I do understand, my dear, that he has to fend for himself. We did take this into account.

Sanctimony.

OP posts:
statesmom · 18/07/2024 15:48

My son was in year 8, as I recall, not 8 years old.

It was 10 years ago; we were choosing between Westminster and another school and I wanted to get some opinions.

I didn't give full details because I thought, hmm, there may be some unhinged people on this site and don't want to give too many details.

But I guess I must have been wrong: there don't appear to be too many unhinged, hysterical women on this site. Sorry

OP posts:
DDberzatto · 18/07/2024 16:08

statesmom · 18/07/2024 15:48

My son was in year 8, as I recall, not 8 years old.

It was 10 years ago; we were choosing between Westminster and another school and I wanted to get some opinions.

I didn't give full details because I thought, hmm, there may be some unhinged people on this site and don't want to give too many details.

But I guess I must have been wrong: there don't appear to be too many unhinged, hysterical women on this site. Sorry

So this is also not you then at the same time, worried about a Year 8 (13 year old) being taught about Sex Education?

All candidates for the Great School at 13+ (year 8) Westminster have to be registered by Year 5…

statesmom · 04/02/2014 21:49
pointythings said: "Maybe you and your husband will teach your children about sex (though saying 'don't do it until you're married' doesn't classify as 'teaching about sex'). But lots of parents don't"
^^
So because other people aren't responsible parents that means the state can intervene between me and my children?
^^
And what if I want to say "don't do it until you're married"? Because that's not acceptable to you I have to accept you teaching my 8 year old about condoms?
^^
Do you call that a free society?

statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:11

Do you obsess over the Zapruder film, too?

OP posts:
statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:15

Huh, you must have a lot of free time to go over details about a 10 year old post from some random that you feel must be shown to be beyond the pale.

Everything I am saying, everything I am telling you, everything I am writing is basically true.

I know this is hard for you to accept, but there are people who disagree with you, and who live their lives differently from you.

And, by they way might, just might, be as intelligent and moral as you must surely be.

OP posts:
Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:16

statesmom · 18/07/2024 15:44

This is such a lazy argument.

Guess what lady? At one point I wiped his butt. Literally. I no longer do that.

He is totally on his own, happy, and ready for the world, what good and ill it brings him.

I do understand, my dear, that he has to fend for himself. We did take this into account.

Sanctimony.

😁

Parker231 · 18/07/2024 16:16

statesmom · 18/07/2024 15:44

This is such a lazy argument.

Guess what lady? At one point I wiped his butt. Literally. I no longer do that.

He is totally on his own, happy, and ready for the world, what good and ill it brings him.

I do understand, my dear, that he has to fend for himself. We did take this into account.

Sanctimony.

Many of us on this thread also have DC’s who have now started their graduate jobs - happy, independent and successful. Your DS is no different

Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:17

Parker231 · 18/07/2024 16:16

Many of us on this thread also have DC’s who have now started their graduate jobs - happy, independent and successful. Your DS is no different

Totally- and some of us didn’t fork out a shedload of money…

DDberzatto · 18/07/2024 16:18

I’m no conspiracy theorist@statesmom. No one cares if you wanted to disguise yourself and ask questions about a School you wanted to send your Son to.

But

You have denigrated the school, the staff, the teaching, the facilities, the Bursary Scheme, the Admissions Counsellors. You have given an entirely false and inaccurate picture of what the School is. If you think that’s normal I don’t think my engaging with you helps anyone. But it is an unfair representation of most families recent experiences.

If anyone is looking for genuine advice to navigate through the US college admissions system I am pointing out that you have been entirely disingenuous thus far and as such, should not be relied upon for giving an accurate picture of the process.

statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:19

Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:17

Totally- and some of us didn’t fork out a shedload of money…

Does this make you feel better about yourself?

i could have paid for 30,000 of these consultants and I'd still be quite fine financially.

OP posts:
Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:23

statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:19

Does this make you feel better about yourself?

i could have paid for 30,000 of these consultants and I'd still be quite fine financially.

I’m not sure the point you’re trying to make here. I’m not going to get into a “who is richer than who” discussion when you have no idea of my financial situation.
No doubt you’ll have the last word though!

DDberzatto · 18/07/2024 16:27

statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:15

Huh, you must have a lot of free time to go over details about a 10 year old post from some random that you feel must be shown to be beyond the pale.

Everything I am saying, everything I am telling you, everything I am writing is basically true.

I know this is hard for you to accept, but there are people who disagree with you, and who live their lives differently from you.

And, by they way might, just might, be as intelligent and moral as you must surely be.

Ahh but here’s the thing. I didn’t need a ‘Super Tutor’ to get the DC into the Great School. I didn’t need to sling £1-2k at ‘the nice American Woman running the Development programme’ to try and buy my child a place either (I had second hand embarrassment for you at that point). I didn’t need an admissions counsellor to ensure the DC got places at Uni and I did contribute to the bursary fund because it is the right thing to do if you can help another child with the same potential your own who is in different socio economic circumstances enjoy what we could afford .

I don’t think that makes me ‘more moral’ or less tolerant of how other people choose to live their lives either. What a strange viewpoint.

statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:33

Again and again and again, the agitated, insecure, hysterical mothers on this site say: "Oh, but I didn't pay for my DC to get X, Y, Z!!!!!!!!!! You are pushy and not letting them live their lives!!!!!"

Read: "I AM SO BETTER THAN YOU!!!"

Such lazy thinking.

Some mothers give their children vitamins. Are they pushy?

Some mothers give their children piano lessons. Are they pushy?

Some mothers send their children to private schools, get tutors if the kid has needs, take them to tennis camps. Are they pushy and not letting their children lead full and independent lives?

The arrogance, the idea of "I am so much more holy than you" that permeates some of the crazy people here is, frankly, funny to me.

Thank Heavens I do not have such people in my circles. Anywhere.

OP posts:
statesmom · 18/07/2024 16:35

A few nutcases, really.

Anyway, good night. I'm in our villa in Southeast Asia.

(cue: "what a great windup thread!!!")

No. Really.

OP posts:
Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:42

Gosh- so far I’ve only seen one insecure person on here….

londonmummy1966 · 18/07/2024 16:57

Goneblindduetosevereeyeroll · 18/07/2024 16:42

Gosh- so far I’ve only seen one insecure person on here….

Me too - think it might be the same one?

mathanxiety · 18/07/2024 19:35

user149799568 · 17/07/2024 20:06

The financial aid I'm talking about is offered by some Ivies and other extremely selective American universities and liberal arts colleges to international students demonstrating exceptional academic potential.

Most students at the Ivies, etc., do not demonstrate exceptional academic potential, unless you consider top decile, or so, to be exceptional. At these schools, there is no expectation or intent that all students should become academics. Your chances of gaining admission go up with academic achievement up until a certain point, which reflects the level that the university expects to teach its classes at, but then plateaus until a child really does get exceptional. A few students will be admitted because of truly exceptional academic potential. Most students will be admitted because of other demonstrations of potential.

The financial aid offered by these academically elite institutions is based on the demonstrated financial need of the admitted applicants.

That is true. They have almost all shifted from merit-based scholarships to need-based aid, on the theory that merit-based scholarships tend to reward students who were already advantaged by having a lot of resources to develop their merit.

Your rowing prowess (or slight stature, ability to swim, and willingness to learn to cox) might get you onto a crew once you arrive in Harvard or Princeton or wherever, but it won't get you in in the first place,

That is not true. Once a certain minimum level of academic achievement is demonstrated, Harvard and Princeton look for demonstrations excellence in something, and that something is usually not academic. The idea is that someone who has the discipline and hard work to compete at a national level in, say swimming, and still maintain acceptable academics even after 20 or 30 hours per week of practice and competitions, will be able to keep up at the university and will eventually find some other area in which to apply their discipline and hard work and, hopefully, excel.

and it won't pay for your four years there.

That is true. You are not obliged to continue your sport or music or any other activity to maintain your need-based aid. You are, of course, required to achieve sufficient academic results to remain at the university, but these requirements are nowhere near 'exceptional'.

You've weirdly conflated 'academic potential' with 'future careers in academia'. Academic potential means the ability to learn and contribute to the undergrad environment in any given third level environment.

Financial aid has always been need based.
Merit scholarships have always been a completely different kettle of fish.
(Assuming you're talking about the past three decades - back in the days of making enough at your summer job to afford private university, things may have been different).
Currently, students can get financial aid in varying proportions from the university that admits them (you apply each yearbfor financialnaid, via the FAFSA alone for state universities and via FAFSA plus CSS Profile for private institutions) plus scholarships for any kind of attribute they may qualify for - e.g. young woman from a large family seeking to major in mathematics, student whose ancestors come from a certain town in Greece, etc. Quite often, but not always, a scholarship needs to be declared, and the financial aid offered by the institution is reduced by the amount of the scholarship.

On top of financial aid (often offered as part of the package) there are federally subsidised loans, up to a limited amount and repayable after graduation, and Pell grants, which are paid to the student and are not loans (again, limited amounts available per student). There are also education loans that parents can take out, repayable upon disbursement.

There are thousands of students in the US who have long lists of fantastic attainments in the fine and performing arts, sports, community leadership, entrepreneurship, and more, who get turned down by elite colleges and universities every year. Admission to these institutions, which attract tens of thousands more applications each year than there are places available, is basically a crapshoot, and there is no way to tell what criteria in an application an admissions committee will accept or reject.

Priorities of an admissions committee can include increasing representation in the student body of rural applicants from mountain states, increasing representation of students from small southern cities, and pretty much any other category you can imagine, barring categories recently deemed unconstitutional.

puffyisgood · 18/07/2024 19:43

mediocre trolling imo.

the things that have been said here are about 5% spot on; 25% fair-ish comment that sort of roughly clangs on the truth; 70% varying shades of nonsense.

anyone whose hackles were raised by any of it needs to have a serious word with herself.

user149799568 · 18/07/2024 20:21

mathanxiety · 18/07/2024 19:35

You've weirdly conflated 'academic potential' with 'future careers in academia'. Academic potential means the ability to learn and contribute to the undergrad environment in any given third level environment.

Financial aid has always been need based.
Merit scholarships have always been a completely different kettle of fish.
(Assuming you're talking about the past three decades - back in the days of making enough at your summer job to afford private university, things may have been different).
Currently, students can get financial aid in varying proportions from the university that admits them (you apply each yearbfor financialnaid, via the FAFSA alone for state universities and via FAFSA plus CSS Profile for private institutions) plus scholarships for any kind of attribute they may qualify for - e.g. young woman from a large family seeking to major in mathematics, student whose ancestors come from a certain town in Greece, etc. Quite often, but not always, a scholarship needs to be declared, and the financial aid offered by the institution is reduced by the amount of the scholarship.

On top of financial aid (often offered as part of the package) there are federally subsidised loans, up to a limited amount and repayable after graduation, and Pell grants, which are paid to the student and are not loans (again, limited amounts available per student). There are also education loans that parents can take out, repayable upon disbursement.

There are thousands of students in the US who have long lists of fantastic attainments in the fine and performing arts, sports, community leadership, entrepreneurship, and more, who get turned down by elite colleges and universities every year. Admission to these institutions, which attract tens of thousands more applications each year than there are places available, is basically a crapshoot, and there is no way to tell what criteria in an application an admissions committee will accept or reject.

Priorities of an admissions committee can include increasing representation in the student body of rural applicants from mountain states, increasing representation of students from small southern cities, and pretty much any other category you can imagine, barring categories recently deemed unconstitutional.

Academic potential means the ability to learn

On this point we agree.

and contribute to the undergrad environment in any given third level environment.

On this point we don't. And, Oxbridge seems not to care too much about this type of potential in their academies.

But, as there is no official definition of 'academic potential', that's fine, as long as we make clear what we're talking about.

alldayeveryday247 · 18/07/2024 21:08

It's very odd to call other people agitated and insecure when you sound far more agitated (so, so, so defensive!) and insecure (incredibly so, to the point of cringeworthy declarations) than anyone else on the thread 😬

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