Becky High, Dr Challoners High, Aylesbury High, Wycombe High or Chesham Grammar

[sadierussell2]

I'm narrowing down the schools search but I'm more interested in the diversity of these schools because challoners high is a bit more diverse than becky high, and i want my DD to go to a diverse school (shes mixed) and also i want your opinon on how you would rank these schools (forget about distances to my house for now). Thanks

What issues did you have that mean you have to consider diversity in selecting the sex school? The home counties seems to have a fair/even dispersion.

Some girls get very anxious about school and are perfectionists. No high performing school is immune. If DC are not happy, there are other alternatives. In Bucks, very few parents of bright DC don’t see the grammar as everything. The obvious ones are the people who go to private schools, eg Wycombe Abbey. My DD got 140(max 141) in the 11 plus back in the day but we chose boarding. Most people thought we were bonkers.

AHS has always had a lot of MFL provision. Back in the day it was a specialist MFL school. Luckily my DD was required to take a spread of subjects at GCSE and did 2 MFL and 2 humanities plus drama as her choices on top of 6 (maths, sciences, English). I think these days that’s possibly too many!

After DD being at AHS for six years I haven't heard of any mental health issues. And girls do talk so I think my DD would know among her friendship group!

Also I think Spanish, French and German are available for GCSE.

No indeed @TizerorFizz . And I'm pretty sure DD's old school don't do this any more either. We did bring the issue up at the time, but were told this was how they did GCSEs. I think (though stand to be corrected) it was a hangover from the days when the majority of students couldn't really handle 8 academic GCSEs at the same time. To be fair, DD could have taken subjects such as drama, art, geography, business studies so the science-heavy bias was partly choice.

And she’s a scientist @thing47 ! So all worked out ok. I think, though, other talents are less well catered for at many schools. We had no idea DD would be good at MFLs. I’m so glad she got to do 2 and keep them to uni! It partially defines her as a person. I think when dc are restricted to one, it’s not acceptable if they have a talent. We don’t restrict sciences to one. Although in my day, lots of us did one science O level and I could not pass that.

@TimeZonedOut really? your dd knows of no issues. No one with an eating disorder, self harming, at CAMHS? In any of her classes? Then she’s walking around with blinkers on I’m afraid. It’s sad but it’s rife at these high pressure schools and it’s no good pretending it’s not.
They’re good schools but they do have their issues. Maybe speak to parents of girls that have left…….

Ha, yes. DH is like this, he did something called General Science, and failed that. He did however do German, French and Latin (the latter two to AS level, in the days when that was more of a thing). I think it's a shame that MFLs don't seem to be regarded as important these days. DD's English and history teachers both wanted her to take their subjects for A level, and in hindsight she probably should have done one of them along with biology and chemistry, but as you say it has worked out in her case. I'm broadly of the opinion that we specialise too early in England and a lot of DCs would benefit from keeping their options open a while longer.

@TizerorFizz my DD is there now. She is white British, but not one of her friends is. Her class/year is extremely diverse. Meeting outside of school has been a bit problematic as not many of her friends come from Aylesbury, but now they're getting older I hope it will resolve.

@Anonymousemouses Yes but you must be in fairly easy reach of Aylesbury? I’m catchment and we see few ethnic minority dc here. Clearly a different demographic in Aylesbury and I’ve not been aware the change has happened at AHS as you describe. The stats did surprise me. It’s also clear SHF is more popular than it used to be. Years ago, where I live, no one wanted it! The single sex schools ruled!

DD had the choice of SHF and AHS and has chosen SHF.

She has a friend a few years older at AHS who said that 60%ish girls in her class are Asian, which is obviously fine, but a large proportion aren't allowed to socialise outside of school so she's struggled to make friends she can see at weekends etc, and she's going somewhere else for 6th form.

Aylesbury as a town is about 15% Asian but DD's tutoring class was 95% Asian. A lot of Asian families are rightly motivated to see their kids do well, much more than the white British population.

after speaking to other mums around some areas at a local event, they said that AHS is quite diverse in most ethnic groups ith WHS becoming more diverse too but generally in bucks schools most kids tend to be white or asian but are very kind and inclusive anyways

I'm not just looking for 'any' school with diversity but schools who are generally inclusive because in my DD's infant school, there wasn't much diversity but everyone was inclusive but in junior school there was a bit more diversity but people were mostly stuck up in a way and this affected my DD. If i could rephrase this, it's more really the diversity ascept but a good school with good results and are very inclusove should do :)

Sorry I missed your reply. We live in Aylesbury, but some of DD's friends live in MK, which is not easy to facilitate unless parents drive, as they'd need to meet in the centre and the buses are not brilliant. Some live as far as Dunstable.

My DS went AGS (18 yrs before DD started AHS), and I wished I'd sent him to SHFGS, with DD I let her choose, as I was happy with either, but I'm very happy with her choice, even though she was the only one from her primary going there and knew no one.

Her primary was not great, went into special measures, became an academy and its most recent Ofsted still showed it needed improvement, a very different type of school to most of her peers, which shows that children from primaries in a deprived area, with no tutoring, can and do go to grammar schools.

I withdrew my DD from BHS due to bullying, staff turnover, and a high pressure environment. I wasn’t the only one to do so in her year. The schools rely on constant testing and pressure on the girls (and the parents) - some thrive but it creates an environment where they are expected to deal with significant pressure at a young age and that doesn’t always result in optimal behaviour.

@Anonymousemouses I was a governor at a primary in a deprived area of Aylesbury for years. We had one or two pass every year. Yes, of course it’s possible, but most couldn’t afford tutoring!!! It used to 100% annoy me snd I believe the schools should be allowed to do more. It’s massively unfair. Exam technique was often the big problem. Aylesbury Vale has the lowest pass rate of anywhere in Bucks. Hence the catchments are large. It’s always had a spread of Thame to MK though. Plus the villages like Edelsborough near Dunstable. It’s rural so distances are big but lots of villages are easily accessible from Aylesbury, eg Wendover, Haddenham, Whitchurch, Wing etc.

@Hedgehohg You have to know your DD. Girls often put pressure on themselves. These are grammar schools and yes, there’s pressure to do well but someone is bottom of the pile. Someone (maybe lots) are striving to be top. Some parental expectations are massive. That’s well known too. Lots of pushy parents. Add this to over tutoring. Many teachers are aware some dc at these schools have been tutored to within an inch of their lives to get into these schools. Some dc would be far better off at a slower pace but parents won’t accept it. So there are some issues but if DDs aren’t happy, then it’s not the school for you but it’s a high performing grammar so not quite sure what you expected? Teacher turnover isn’t unusual in an area where housing costs a huuuuge!

@TizerorFizz this got to the extent of 5 hours of homework a day expected during the Easter holidays to cover for the fact that they had had cover teachers for much of a term. My DD was very high performing but just deeply unhappy there. The MH challenges for a lot of the girls were a problem (as someone alluded to up the thread).

Around here we always say you are either a Becky High type, or you aren't. Those that are will thrive, those that aren't often move elsewhere. We knew from looking round that it wouldn't be the tight place for DD. This is what worries me about parents who want any grammar school at any cost.

@TizerorFizz absolutely they should. I'm very lucky with both my DS and DD that they didn't require tutoring. When DS passed I was on income support, so couldn't afford it.

There were another two who passed in DD's class, they were tutored. I felt embarrassed when talking to their parents (when the results came out) and had to admit that DD hadn't been.

I live in social housing too (was council), and there was a scheme where the HA offered tuition for their tenants for the 11+. It was after DS qualified (2003) and finished by the time DD did (2020), so I have no idea of the amount of students who benefitted and the results that it achieved.

DD's primary school begins with E (you probably know it if you're familiar with Aylesbury).

It is an unfair system, luckily we've managed to avoid the pitfalls, but I would be shouting from the rooftops if DD had been allocated one of the poorer secondaries.

@TizerorFizz btw I don't think my children are in any way remarkable and I'm very sadly quite a bad mum, who hasn't pushed them enough, or invested enough (my friend whose son is the same age as DD goes to a secondary here (AVA), but she pays for him to have extra tuition every week, I feel so bad that I can't afford that for DD, but I honestly can't.

A lot of her classmates also have extra tuition, so the disparity doesn't end when your child passes.

DD is doing geography when she starts Y10. There is a trip abroad for it. We can't afford it, even with the support they've offered. Same as extra-curricular activities, etc.

I feel awful for DD, but she is motivated (to an extent), and seems very happy. Her friends don't seem to notice the difference in backgrounds they have, but I'm aware of it. If the school was more accessible, then I think I wouldn't feel so bad.

Sorry OT I know.

@Anonymousemouses I do know your school. You might know HA just down the road. Regarding the trip, do you get PP money going into the school for her?

@Anonymousemouses If dc are happy do they need extra tuition? I really would not worry about that. I can assure not everyone at the grammars does this. My dc didn’t have 11 plus tutoring either. I also know loads in my area who did and didn’t pass. I think passing without excessive help is better in the long run. I’m sure your dc will be fine. There are plenty of people with fairly ordinary homes and you are NOT a bad mum. Do you have any grandparents who could chip in a bit of money?

One thing I would say: try and aim high for dc. Research A levels and best unis for their subject. In the end, that’s what pays off.

Hi I’m deciding between 2 grammar schools for my daughter. Dr Challoners High or Becky High. Can anyone please share their experience of these schools please in recent years?
Both seem to have similar academic results, but is any one better suited depending on the child’s personality, and more nurturing where girls genuinely seem happy?

Many thanks

@Carrie17. Just checking but do you genuinely have the choice of both? Are you in catchment for both? Where are her friends likely to go? I’d go with your feelings when you look round. Some won’t like the schools but the vast majority will. So where do you see YOUR dd fitting in.

Also don’t put down, as your only grammar, one that’s iffy to get into. look at admission stats. (Unless you have two offers and she’s y6?) For the future, always include the nailed on choice. Also don’t expect any grammar to be truly nurturing. They are not immune to financial pressures. If you think a slower pace suits dd better, take that into consideration when you visit schools. Don’t just visit the grammars.

Thanks for feedback. Yes we live in Gerrard’s Cross and are in catchment for both schools. Depending on your 1st choice girls normally get either of these schools from here. My daughter’s friends are deciding between these two schools and independent schools.
We’ve seen both schools and the girls who showed us around seemed happy in both schools.