All girls school or mixed comp

[mesha123]

Hello,

My dd is in year 5.

I have always wanted to send her to a mixed comp. The main reason being she is an only child, no male cousins and all our friends have daughter's too. So I feel if I send her to an all girls she will hardly get any interaction with boys outside.

However I recently came across Everyone's invited website and have been reading a lot about the issues at schools like - class being dominated by boys, girls not choosing STEM, sexual abuse, drug problems at school, etc. All these make me think whether I should really be sending her mixed comp or better to try and send to an all girls instead.

Also at the same time I don't want her to go boy obsessed and uncomfortable around boys when she grows up.

Would really appreciate your thoughts...

Thanks for reading.

My advice would be to choose the school that's right rather than setting. My daughter went to a girl's school until GCSE and then to a mixed grammar for A Level. She was pleased to not have the hassle of boys and I think it helped her keep a little more focus on her studies. I teach at a mixed comprehensive and mostly love it but there's definitely some drawbacks in my opinion.

I'd go on your gut feeling and keep an open mind. There's some time to go yet for your daughter so see how she develops.

I think this is a really important point. My DD is at a local, comprehensive girls school. I’m sure it’s a very different experience to a single sex grammar or private school.

DD goes to a girls grammar, I haven’t noticed excess bitchiness when compared with her friends at various mixed schools (I hear them all chatting away on video calls, and her best friend who goes to a mixed school is having a nightmare with friend groups). But she is only year 8, so I know that may change.

They have discos and other events with the boys school next door and loiter about in mixed groups after school.

A local school that I really disliked in other ways had what I think is a great set up. Boys and girls on same site and together at break and lunch but taught separately.

I mentioned the grammar because oddly it was not the competitive hothouse it once had a reputation to be and very chilled out compared with any of the local state schools. So I wouldn't be put off thinking grammars are competitive and bitchy as it can be quite the reverse.

Ours is exactly the same @shearwater2

I went to an all girls grammar and loved it. I didn't experience any meanness. Everyone I came across was very supportive. My niece now goes to the same school and loves it. I wanted dd to go to all girls but she wanted to go to a grammar that had a great sports department. Happened to be mixed. She loves it and doesn't experience nastiness from boys. She rarely mentions boys when she talks about her day. Sports and games are segregated by sex which is good.

I think if had a daughter I’d send her to an all girls school and a boy to go to a mixed school.
I went to an all girls school myself and liked it.

As so many have said, it depends on the child. I went to an all girls grammar and loved it . No school is perfect, but I think that the all girls environment is potentially protective against pervasive sexism or worse.

I moved my daughter from a mixed state primary to an all girls private school in P5 and she has flourished. We are now discussing secondary options and she wants to stay single sex. She likes a calm environment, to assist with some additional learning needs, and feels this is more likely in a single sex environment.

I would choose based on the school not the sex of the students. I have twin girls, one is going to a girls grammar and the other to a mixed grammar. Our choices were based on the best fit for them and nothing else.

Thankyou everyone for taking the time and replying. It is very helpful in taking a decision.

I like the diamond model for girls - mixed for primary, single sex for 11 - 16 and then back to mixed for sixth form. I think girls only for the most vulnerable early teen years gives them a breathing space away from boys and sexual bullying. Hopefully builds a bedrock of confidence that then can then take on to sixth form.

I agree with those posters who recommend finding the right school for your DC(s), as far as that is possible. When these threads come up, there is always a proportion of mums who say they loved their all-girls school and a proportion who say they hated it. It's hard to extrapolate from that whether your DD will prefer it or not.

It is factually true to say that girls do better academically in single-sex schools, particularly with regard to STEM subjects but even then there are exceptions. DD2 went to a then not very good secondary modern school but still took triple science at GCSE, 3 x science subjects for A level and how has 2 x STEM degrees. Mixed schooling suited her because she prefers her friendship group to be mixed, but if your DD thrives in large groups of girls then single-sex may very well be a good fit.