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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Swearing in year 7

51 replies

Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 19:51

My ds has just started year 7 in a state school that is very over subscribed, it’s in a lovely area and he is really happy there . However , he has told me that half of year 7 swear a lot at break times .. is this normal in secondary school ? His friend that goes to a private school also hears swearing .. I am surprised at this .. is it a just trying to be cool and grown up thing?

OP posts:
Hellocatshome · 30/09/2023 20:03

Do you live under a rock? Yes it is a trying to be cool thing and has always been and always will be this way. It doesn't matter how oversubscribed the school is kids are kids.

VioletCharlotte · 30/09/2023 20:04

Can you not remember this from when you were at school? It's just kids testing the boundaries and trying to be cool!

TheLongGloriesOfTheWinterMoon · 30/09/2023 20:05

Yes they think it's cool.
Your son does it as well.
Trust me.

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:05

really for year 7 ? No I don’t live under a rock , I am just surprised so many year 7s are swearing , they have just left primary . Thanks for your helpful post though

OP posts:
Blanketpolicy · 30/09/2023 20:06

Secondary school kids swearing? Well, I never!

Secondaryschoolstress · 30/09/2023 20:08

It was like this back in 1991 when I started school. It’s the most normal thing in the world. Regardless of which school they attend. Just teach him when and where it’s appropriate, and when it’s definitely not.

i.e. alone with his mates = ok
At school = not ideal but it happens
At lunch with with granny = a definite ono no

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 30/09/2023 20:10

Yup. Trying to be cool. Trying to fit in. Tale as old as time (secondary teacher here)

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:12

not all kids like swearing , I know it happens . Some are uncomfortable with it …

OP posts:
Hellocatshome · 30/09/2023 20:12

Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:05

really for year 7 ? No I don’t live under a rock , I am just surprised so many year 7s are swearing , they have just left primary . Thanks for your helpful post though

I hate to burst your bubble but a fair bit of swearing goes on in year 6 as well.

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:13

@Blanketpolicy helpful post .. why bother ?

OP posts:
Fireisland · 30/09/2023 20:16

It's a rare y7 that doesn't swear!

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:17

@Hellocatshome my ds said he barely heard a swear word in year 6 . Of course I know kids swear in secondary but I am just surprised how much in year 7 so early on . Some kids actually don’t like it , yes that may change as they get older . His friend was annoyed at it as well ..

OP posts:
AliMonkey · 30/09/2023 20:19

Definitely normal at DS's school (as is fighting, bullying and generally misbehaving unfortunately). However, he's now Y12 and I have still never heard him swear (though doesn't of course mean he doesn't at school, but I suspect not as then surely it would occasionally slip out at home), so hopefully it won't be a bad influence on your DS.

Hellocatshome · 30/09/2023 20:21

Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:17

@Hellocatshome my ds said he barely heard a swear word in year 6 . Of course I know kids swear in secondary but I am just surprised how much in year 7 so early on . Some kids actually don’t like it , yes that may change as they get older . His friend was annoyed at it as well ..

The thing is part of being at school is learning how to get along with a large community of people some of whom may do things you dont like, hold opinions you dont agree with etc. If they are swearing at him and/or using racist/homophobic slurs then that is obviously not ok. If they are just swearing in general conversation then thats a live and let live situation. The first of many he will have to negotiate throughout school and adult life

MigGirl · 30/09/2023 20:26

Haha swearing is normal, although teachers will tell them off. It's the pennies drawn everywhere that annoys me, desks, books, walls if only they could actually draw them correctly.

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:29

yes I understand what you are saying .

OP posts:
sunlovingcriminal · 30/09/2023 20:33

Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:17

@Hellocatshome my ds said he barely heard a swear word in year 6 . Of course I know kids swear in secondary but I am just surprised how much in year 7 so early on . Some kids actually don’t like it , yes that may change as they get older . His friend was annoyed at it as well ..

They're not going to tell you that they think it's okay! You're a parent so of course they'll say they don't like the swearing. My son is in year 9, and doesn't swear at home (we're not mega sweary people), but I'm sure he does at school and I'd be surprised otherwise!

Ggttl · 30/09/2023 20:41

They start swearing a lot in Yr6. It continues into secondary. It isn’t anything like as annoying as other things children do at this age, so I’m surprised your DS is bothered by it.

Original poster
Sweetie1980 · 30/09/2023 20:45

some kids just don’t want to hear it ! I totally get that as a lot of adults don’t want to hear swearing all the time ..

OP posts:
clary · 30/09/2023 20:47

Yes I agree with others, quite normal.

Swearing in conversation with peers - fine, normal, completely standard at 10+.

Swearing in front of your mum - TBC (see below)

Swearing at your teacher - probably be sent out or given detention. So don't do that.

My Ds1 swears quite a bit, sometimes in front of me, not really at me (maybe a muttered grumpy word); DS2 swears mostly in relation to or when playing his sport "f-ing well move up the pitch!" and then sometimes when he is talking to me about it - but soon corrects himself. I have never heard DD swear at all. \

So they have all (youngest is 20) grown up to find their own way of dealing with it. Your son will be fine @Sweetie1980 - as a PP said, it's just something else to deal with from other people. A good learning experience tbh.

Stealthtax · 30/09/2023 20:57

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Mumstheword93 · 30/09/2023 20:58

Sweetie it doesn't matter weather they go to a state school or private school, my partner and his friends all went to private school and say the c word more than I can count.

Every child experiments with swearing it's naughty, they've left primary school their in with the big kids now....its a normal part of growing up.

Brilliantlydone · 30/09/2023 21:00

Year 7 do swear , but not in lessons.
In lessons they find the number 69 hilarious and say it at many opportunities 🙄

Holidaylover68 · 30/09/2023 21:03

This post made me lol. I worked in primary for 16 years and learnt all my fave swear words from them, probably Y3 upwards. Very normal!

clary · 30/09/2023 21:04

Brilliantlydone · 30/09/2023 21:00

Year 7 do swear , but not in lessons.
In lessons they find the number 69 hilarious and say it at many opportunities 🙄

Oh yes indeed.

I taught German in school for many years - the letter G is hilarious, as is the word for father, and the word for six. And don't even get me started on the word for art....